


Take two

by muffinfury



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bisexual Bucky Barnes, Bisexual Clint Barton, Bisexual Tony Stark, Everybody is a Good Bro, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Gay Steve Rogers, Happy Ending, I started tagging individuals but there were too many good bros, Light Angst, M/M, Minor Agents of SHIELD, Mostly happy throughout, POV Steve Rogers, Post-Avengers (2012), Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Slow Burn, Superhusbands (Marvel), new timeline
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2020-10-29 10:02:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 55,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20794838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muffinfury/pseuds/muffinfury
Summary: This story explores what happens in the new 2012 timeline that Steve, Tony, Bruce, and Scott created when they went back for the two infinity stones there. They weren’t supposed to change anything, but they didn’t quite manage it. Steve and Tony learn about each other, what’s important, and who to trust.





	1. The Hero

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first foray into writing in this fandom, and my first attempt at writing in nearly 10 years, so we’ll see how it goes. I welcome all comments, including concrit, although please, make sure any criticism is, in fact, constructive. 
> 
> A little backstory, this is mostly MCU compliant, although there are going to be a few things I do differently. I don’t like how Pepper and Tony came about in the MCU. She dedicated all her time to taking care of him as his PA and then suddenly she became the man-child dream woman because she took care of him and had sex with him, to say nothing of the awful power dynamic. I actually did like them in Endgame, so as far as I’m concerned, in the MCU, they got together much later on, maybe during Iron Man 3. She’d established herself as his CEO, he’d grown up a little and learned to take care of himself, and then their relationship plays out through the rest of the movies. All this to say that in 2012, right after the Battle of New York, they are not together. They are, of course, very close, and she knows him better than just about anyone. 
> 
> I’m also not crazy about Clint’s secret wife (although it did bring us the amazing scene where Tony accused the kids of being smaller agents). The whole thing seemed really forced to me, and mostly just a way to explain why he and Natasha weren’t in a relationship (because obviously a man and a woman can’t be close and not in a relationship unless there’s a REASON). However, him having a wife and kids had some pretty serious Endgame consequences, so I feel like there has to be something. Instead, I’m going to have Laura be his sister who is raising her kids alone. They’re very close, and he loves those kids like his own. Natasha is still Auntie Nat. They are all still a secret that’s off the SHIELD record book for safety. Clint still goes off the rails when they get snapped. He still visits them in the test in Endgame.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve tries to figure out where Loki went, what happened downstairs, and where he goes from here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This starts immediately after Steve’s fight with future!Steve in Endgame.

Steve came abruptly to consciousness, his face pressed against the cool tile floor. He pushed himself up to his knees and looked around but saw no sign of Loki. The scepter, however, was on the floor next to him. “Damn. How long was I out?” he wondered aloud. Since he hadn’t seen anyone, he started when he received a response.

“You were unconscious for approximately 15 minutes, Captain Rogers.” Steve jumped to his feet, bracing himself for an attack.

“Who said that?” 

“I apologize for startling you, Captain. My name is JARVIS. I run the Stark Tower.”

Steve came slowly out of his tense crouch, puzzling over what he had just heard. “Edwin?” he asked. Now that he was fully conscious and focusing, rather than reacting, he realized that the voice was familiar to him. He smiled at the idea of seeing a friend from his life before. 

“I am afraid not, Captain. JARVIS stands for ‘Just a Rather Very Intelligent System,’ although I believe this name was chosen to honor Edwin Jarvis after his death. I am an artificial intelligence created by Mr. Stark. I monitor Stark Tower at all times and assist Mr. Stark in any way I can.”

Steve was disappointed, as the hope that had barely had time to flicker died. “I’m sorry to hear about Edwin. He was a good man and a friend. It says a lot that Tony would create a whole system to honor him.” Steve paused, thinking about the rest of what JARVIS had said, and he decided that this new JARVIS could be helpful, hoping he could be friends with JARVIS, as he had been with Edwin. “Say, if you monitor the Tower all the time, do you think you could please help me figure out where Loki went? Or why he left the scepter?”

“I do not have a record of Loki leaving with the scepter. The scepter was removed by a man who matches the existing data on Captain Steven Grant Rogers. He then returned a short time later and replaced the scepter.”

Steve sighed. “Yeah, Loki disguised himself as me. He did it earlier, too.” Steve frowned at the memory.

“I apologize for the confusion, Captain. The man who was in this room fighting with you and who both left and returned with the scepter was not Loki. His energy signature did not match that of Loki, even when Loki temporarily created the illusion that he was Captain America preparing to coordinate search and rescue. Indeed, during the time of your fight, Loki’s energy signature was detected in the lobby of the building with Thor and Mr. Stark. The man you fought with most closely resembled you, although he was not an exact match for your energy signature.” There was a brief pause, as if JARVIS was thinking; then, “If I may, Captain, when he returned the scepter, he asked me to record a message for you. Would you like to hear it?”

Steve blinked. Matched him. Not Loki. “Might as well, I suppose. Please, go ahead JARVIS.” A voice that sounded just like his rang out in the room.

“You’re going to have trouble believing this, but I need you to give it a shot. I’m you from the future. I know, I know. Crazy, right? I was just saying the other day how much I miss the days when the craziest thing science had come up with was me. We weren’t supposed to change anything, but I’m sure I’ve already done that telling you Bucky was alive. I wasn’t lying about that, by the way. He is. I don’t have much time, so I’ll just tell you two things. The first is to prove I am who I say. You’re attracted to men. As much as you wanted to love Peggy, and as much as you might’ve grown to be happy with her, she was never your destiny. You’ve never told anyone, not even Bucky, but your first crush was on the boy down the street who lived with his family over the butcher shop.” Steve opened his mouth, but the recording continued, “Don’t interrupt. Yeah, I knew you were gonna. Just listen. The other thing I’m going to say is this: trust Tony. You won’t always understand him. In fact, you’ll almost never understand him, and by the time you’ve unraveled one thing, he’s already done five more crazy things and you can’t catch up. But trust him. Trust the team. And make sure you deserve their trust in you. What you started today can be the most amazing thing in your life if you let it. So let it. I have to go. Good luck. Don’t make my mistakes.”

The recording stopped and Steve just stood, immobile, wondering what the hell he was going to do now. Well, nowhere to go but forward. “Um, JARVIS? Do you think you could keep the first item on his list to yourself? The proof that he was… me? Boy, that’s odd. I’m going to have to tell the rest of the team that he was here, and what he said about us, but…” Steve took a breath, trying to find the words. It wasn’t like no one had ever known he liked men, but he was pretty sure most of them weren’t in this century.

“Do not be concerned, Captain. I will certainly keep the details of this conversation confidential. It is written into my programming never to disclose a person’s sexuality. However, you may be interested to learn about the changes in civil rights since your time of origin. Homosexuality is no longer illegal, and although there are many individuals who hold unfortunate beliefs regarding the morality of it, much progress has been made. In fact, two people of the same sex may be legally married in several states, including New York, as well as the District of Columbia.”

Steve wondered how many more times he could stand to be shocked like this before he really started to crack. “Boy, it’s been a hell of a day. Helicarriers, aliens, portals to outer space, me from the future, and now this. Alright. JARVIS, do you think you could tell me where Tony is? I think I’d like to start by talking to him.” There was a long enough pause that Steve opened his mouth to rescind his request, but then JARVIS responded. 

“Mr. Stark is in his workshop, and he is willing to speak with you there. Please follow the highlighted path.” As he spoke, lights sprang to life along the hall floors. 

Steve took a deep breath and made his way to the workshop, but he forgot everything he was planning to say the moment the doors opened. “Killer diller!” he whispered in awe, so softly Tony may not have even heard him. His fingers itched for a drawing pencil in a way they hadn’t since he’d awoken in this century. Though the walls were unremarkable, the contents of the room radiated beauty. One whole wall was a museum exhibit, displaying Iron Man suits, and everywhere he looked were holograms that appeared to be there by magic. Spinning around with a grin that felt unfamiliar on his face, Steve spotted Tony at a table, screwdriver in hand, watching him curiously.

“What can I do for you, Cap? I thought everyone had bailed. No SHIELD debriefing to attend or search and rescue to organize?”

Despite the edge to his tone, Steve couldn’t manage to bring himself out of his wonder at the workshop. “I don’t know how you ever bring yourself to leave this room. Though I suppose you’d get hungry after a while.”

Tony cleared his throat, seeming mildly surprised by Steve’s enthusiasm and easy praise. “You can’t have come down here just to ogle my toys,” Tony prompted again.

Steve made himself turn away from the suits to face Tony. “Actually, I’m here for two reasons. The first is to apologize for everything I said on the helicarrier. You are a hero, and you deserve my respect.”

Tony brushed this off with a careless wave. “Eh, we were under the influence of Loki’s scepter. Everyone said things they didn’t mean. Old news, bygones, water under the bridge.”

“Oh no, I meant it,” Steve corrected. “I was just wrong.” He hesitated, unsure whether he could really _talk _to Tony, then continued, deciding that he deserved the truth. “I was angry. I _ am _angry. Everything here is too much, too loud, too big. You are certainly no exception to that. The men I served with were heroes, too, but no one remembers them but me. And everyone will remember you. I was too busy being struck by the unfairness of that that I was unfair to you. Truce?” He extended his hand with half a smile. “I think we’re going to need it for the second thing on my list.”

Tony gave a half-smile of his own and returned the handshake. “Should I sit down for this? Or maybe a drink is in order?”

JARVIS interrupted, “Perhaps a drink is inadvisable, sir, given what took place in the lobby.” It might’ve been Steve’s imagination, but that seemed a little pointed. He was curious about what might’ve happened in the lobby, but Tony didn’t seem inclined to share. He just huffed and gestured Steve to a chair. Although Tony sat, he continued to tinker with whatever he was holding. He didn’t seem to be able to hold himself still.

“Alright, drink’s on hold for now. I reserve the right to change my mind, depending on what the boy scout has to offer.”

Steve dove in immediately, telling Tony all about the fight with the other Steve, learning that Bucky was alive, losing the fight, and waking up with the scepter returned. He paused. “Now, here’s where things get odd. The man I fought, he wasn’t Loki in disguise. At least, not according to JARVIS. JARVIS says that this man most closely matched me, and he played me a message that he recorded. He says he’s me from the future. He… he knew things he couldn’t have known otherwise. Things I’d never told anyone. And then he said he only had one piece of advice. He told me to trust you. The rest of the team, too, but you first, and that I need to deserve your trust. He said our team could be amazing. So here I am. Trusting you not to decide I’m crazy. Well, I probably am crazy, but this part is true.”

All Tony said was, “J?”

“I can confirm everything the Captain has stated thus far, sir. The energy signature of the man he fought was definitively not Loki. The explanation provided by the man in question does seem to be the most logical one. I do not have a DNA sample, but based on all of the scans available to me, he was who he said. In addition, tracing his movements back to his arrival in the tower, I have discovered new information. He arrived here in the company of two other men. One has never visited the tower, but based on facial recognition, his identity is Scott Lang, who is currently in prison for breaking into Vistacorp’s headquarters and hacking their systems to return money to their customers. There are no records of him escaping prison. The other man, in all ways I can determine, was Anthony Edward Stark. These two men were in the lobby when you were leaving with Thor. The other Anthony Stark disguised himself as a SHIELD agent, while Scott Lang appears to be able to change his size at will. I believe they were responsible for the malfunction in your arc reactor. Based on my review of the video footage, I believe they were attempting to steal the tesseract until Loki took it and vanished.”

Tony spoke first. “So you’re telling me that our future selves came back in time to beat the crap out of us and steal our stuff?”

“What malfunction in your arc reactor? Are you okay?” 

Tony brushed him off with another wave of his hand. “I’m fine. Mild cardiac dysrhythmia. Goldielocks gave me a little jolt, so we’re square. Let’s get back to the actually important stuff. Future us came back, tried and failed to steal the tesseract, stole Loki’s scepter, then brought back the scepter, left you a voicemail – which contained a mystery piece of personal information, the news that your lifelong best friend from the 40s is not dead, and the instructions to trust me – and then Marty McFly’ed back to the future. Did I miss anything?”

“Well I can’t say I followed the reference at the end,” Steve’s lips quirked, “but then, future me said I’d almost never understand you. The rest of it seems right. If it’s alright with you, I’d also like to talk about something he didn’t say. He was very clear to tell me to trust you and the rest of the team, which I assume includes Thor, Dr. Banner, Natasha, and Clint. He didn’t tell me to trust anyone else. He didn’t tell me to trust Fury or SHIELD. Unless I’ve changed a helluva lot, I think that’s an intentional omission. If I went back to pre-serum me, I’d tell him to trust the Howling Commandos, sure, but I’d also tell him to trust Phillips, Erskine, Howard, Peggy, and the rest of the SSR. I tend to have some… slight issues with authority. I was a rebel long before I was a soldier. I guess what I’m saying is that I’d like to keep this between the team until we have a better idea of what could be going on. Especially after that nuke,” he concluded with a nod to Tony.

“Boy, you sure had me fooled. Not only are you not a good little soldier, you are openly asking me to deceive your commanding officer. I’m so proud.” Tony paused to look at the object in his hand, where his tinkering had never ceased. “I’m not going to be your obstacle there, Cap. It’s Romanoff you need to worry about. I know future you is all about the team, but I don’t know if they’re all there yet. Thor won’t be a problem, and Bruce certainly has no trust for the man. But Romanoff is a spy, second only to Fury. They sent her in here undercover to get a read on me. You saw her with Loki. You’d never know she was lying to you. Never mind that her assessment is from when I was imminently dying. She seems loyal to Barton, and Phil’s death hit her hard, but I think Fury still pulls all her strings. Barton probably won’t be our leak, but he won’t stop her from doing it.”

“Yeah, Romanoff is definitely the snitch of the group. Maybe we release information a little at a time. Start with what seems like Mickey-Mouse stuff. I’m not great at undercover, myself, so I’ll probably have to stick pretty close to the truth,” Steve grimaced a little. “Actually – and trust me the irony isn’t lost on me here – how much did you get from the SHIELD computers when you were on board? Is there any reason that you can see for us not to trust them?”

Tony grinned. “You mean besides the alien weapons of mass destruction? No worries, I left a bug on SHIELD’s servers, in addition to the one Fury saw while we were there. I’ll let you know if I find anything interesting. Here’s the flip side of tech. SHIELD is almost certainly monitoring you if you’re living on site. Probably even if you’re not. They’ll also have bugged that ridiculous brick you call a phone. If you’re serious about secrecy, you’re gonna have to let me hook you up, and you can’t discuss anything anywhere on SHIELD property. They have eyes and ears everywhere, just like I do in this building.”

Steve nodded; although it took him a moment to parse Tony’s rapid speech and modern vernacular, this confirmed his earlier conversation with JARVIS. “That makes sense. Lucky thing I’m used to having no privacy. In the army, we were all living in each other’s pockets, and Bucky could sniff out a secret on me no trouble.” It still hurt to say Bucky’s name, but the little tiny bit of hope he’d gotten from his future self kept him upright.

“Well, that’s good. I’m not good with secrets, either. With one or two very specific exceptions, JARVIS won’t keep secrets from me, so don’t ask. I’ll take care of finding out what I can from SHIELD. You’re going to be in charge of testing Romanoff. I vote we wait to tell everyone else until you get a read on her, because if she sees us having regular conversations with the rest of the team, she’ll want to know why. I don’t do trust. After what I’m sure you’ve read in my files, you should understand why.”

“I don’t. I mean, I didn’t read your files. Or at least not the full thing. They gave me files on everyone, but mostly it was just skills and evaluations, no real history or detail. They, ah. They also showed me some… footage. Of you and Dr. Banner, mostly. They seemed to think it was important. I’m not sure why. The stuff they showed of you doesn’t really seem like you. Anyway, you don’t have to tell me anything you don’t want to. I can wait. Besides, he said I’m supposed to trust you and earn your trust in me. That’s where I’ll start. I’ll keep you posted on what I get from Romanoff. Should we set up a time to meet? Do we need an excuse? Damn, I’m terrible at subterfuge.”

“Keep it simple, Cap. I’ll give you a call in a day or two and tell you I’ve been working on some outfit upgrades. The one you’re wearing is clearly tapped out. I’ll come up with something for some of the others, too. Wouldn’t want them to be jealous. Now – ”

He was interrupted when a strawberry-blond woman ran in on heels so high Steve couldn’t believe she was still upright. “Tony, oh my god, are you okay? Why aren’t you at the hospital? I can’t believe you. When JARVIS told me you were in your workshop, I swear I had to pick my jaw up off the floor. Have you eaten anything? You need to get some rest. I’m putting my foot down, Tony, I mean it.”

Tony’s smile went soft around the edges. “Relax, Pep, I’m fine. JARVIS is monitoring me. I’m too wired to sleep now, anyway. I had some cold pizza. Guess we'll take a raincheck on the shawarma.” Right at that moment, though, Steve’s stomach growled, loudly and to his great embarrassment. Pepper, who hadn’t seen him in her Tony-tunnel-vision, whirled around, eyes widening. Tony laughed. “Apparently, the big guy feels differently. Pepper, this is Steve Rogers. Cap, this is Pepper Potts, light of my life and CEO of my company. I don’t suppose anywhere is going to be delivering tonight, huh?”

“No, no, that’s okay,” Steve rushed to say, cursing the blush he could feel on his pale Irish skin. “I’ll just get something back at the base. I’ve taken up too much of your time, anyway. I’ll see if I can get Natasha and Clint to eat with me. Maybe Thor. I bet he eats a lot, too. After something like the battle, I just can’t keep up with my metabolism. I’ll leave you both alone now.” He could tell he was rambling, but couldn’t do anything to stop it. He’d always been like this around pretty women. “Ma’am, it was lovely to meet you. I’m so sorry for disturbing you.” With that, he vanished, Pepper and Tony blinking after him.

As Steve walked away, his extra-sensitive, serum-enhanced hearing just picked up Tony’s chuckle. “Shit, he’d better hope that none of the villains figure out how scared he is of beautiful women. Aliens and Hydra, no problem. You walk into the room and he can’t escape fast enough.” Steve heard Pepper’s light laughter fade as he walked away.


	2. Modern Times Rock 'n' Roll

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve gets to know some of the other members of his new team a little better and reflects on his life in this new time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since this is my first fic, I don't have a lot of experience with tagging. I'm adding stuff as I think of it, but let me know if you see anything you think I should add to the tags!

Steve managed to snag Thor, Clint, and Natasha and talk them into eating with him in the SHIELD mess. Steve watched carefully as he ate, trying to see what he could learn about his new teammates. Thor was clearly disappointed that Loki had escaped, but he put on a good face, smiling warmly at them all. Clint and Natasha were both obviously exhausted, and even Steve was starting to feel the adrenaline wear off. He was interested to watch how casually the two of them shared space – her leg up on his chair, his head on her shoulder, no hesitation in touching each other. He missed that camaraderie and felt a sudden deep ache for Bucky.

Time to start building the new team. Though they’d been forged in battle, just as the Howling Commandos had, they needed to do some of the normal stuff, too – playing cards, telling wild stories, talking about their girls back home. The real bonding happened in the little moments between battle. Steve cleared his throat, eyes on his food. “So, it seems I’ve got an awful lot of culture to catch up on. Anyone want to help me with that?” He looked up from under his lashes, trying to gauge their reaction. As usual, Natasha showed none, though she did glance briefly at Clint. Clint, on the other hand, looked excited.

“Have you asked anyone else, or are we starting with a blank slate?” he asked.

Steve gave a half-hearted attempt at a smile. “Fury mostly left me alone after I busted up his attempt at a ’40s era hospital.” Clint and Natasha exchanged another significant glance. “I have a radio, but I think Fury did something to it, because I only get a couple of jazz stations. Don’t get me wrong, I love jazz, but they’re not even getting the good stuff. I’d love to hear some other kinds. And all of Stark’s references – those come from movies, right? It’d be nice to understand more than every fifth word he says.”

Clint laughed outright at that. “Well I sure as hell can’t help you with the science side of Stark, but I can get you started on the rest of it. It’ll give me something to do when I’m not sleeping tonight.” Though he said it as if it were a joke, Steve could tell it wasn’t. Clint had to be reeling after being the puppet of a madman bent on total destruction. “The music part’ll be easy. You work out a lot, right? We can put some stuff on your phone for you to listen to at the gym. If you’re okay losing your phone for the night, I’ll load’er up for you.” Clint reached out a hand, and Steve handed over his phone. Clint blinked rapidly. “Um… no offense, Cap, but what the hell is this?” Steve immediately remembered Tony calling his phone a brick.

“Is something wrong with it? This is the phone SHIELD gave me. Should I ask for a different one?”

“It’s just an old model,” Natasha soothed. “If you’re comfortable with this one, you can keep it.” She eyed Steve speculatively. “But if you’re tired of the kid gloves, we can help you pick one out.”

Steve huffed out a laugh. “Yes, please, dispense with the kid gloves. Might actually be my favorite thing about Stark. Zero risk of kid gloves there. How am I ever supposed to catch up if everyone keeps pretending nothing’s changed?” As they finished eating, they made plans to meet up the next day to buy him a new phone, then decided to meet at Natasha’s to watch their first movie. Despite everything that had happened that day – and boy, had it been maybe the longest day in history – Steve went to bed feeling more hopeful than he had so far this century.

* * *

Steve slept solidly that night, his body working overtime to heal the minor damage done to him during the fight. From the look of Clint, he hadn’t fared nearly so well. The store with the phones was a little overwhelming, but Steve picked things up pretty quickly. The more he saw, the more he realized SHIELD had been sheltering him and guiding what he could and couldn’t see. Before the battle, he’d hardly left his room except to go to the gym. He wondered if he would’ve done all this if he hadn’t had a visit from future him, then decided it wasn’t worth trying to figure out. He didn’t know much of anything about his future, and it would drive him to madness if he examined every move wondering whether or not it was the same. He bought a phone and a laptop, deciding he didn't need a tablet. He would see if Natasha would come out with him for other things he needed – it would be a good opportunity to try and feel her out one-on-one. 

Thor skipped the shopping but met them at Natasha’s, which was homier than Steve expected. Despite the weapons case against the wall, which he suspected was only a part of her stash, the whole room seemed warm and welcoming. It threw Steve's own place into sharp relief. Though he had no visible weapons in his apartment, it lacked every feel of home. It had been decorated by someone else in a poor facsimile of the '40s, and he hated every inch of it. 

Natasha pulled out a slim box and flashed it at Clint. “Perfect! Great movie, a million references, nothing that should be too touchy. Pop it in!” They settled in, Thor and Steve on the couch, Natasha in an armchair, and Clint stretched out on the floor. Natasha brought out warm, buttery popcorn in pretty cream-colored bowls.

And over the next couple of hours, Steve fell in love. He fell in love with the beauty of the sets and the man reading to his grandson and the storytelling. He was the perfect audience – tearing up when Buttercup thought Westley dead, gasping when they were attacked in the forest, laughing over Westley’s battle of wits with the Sicilian. He watched with rapt attention all the way through the end, as Westley told Inigo Montoya that he’d make a good Dread Pirate Roberts.

After the credits rolled, Steve sat back. He’d been unaware that he’d even leaned forward. “Well, you’re going to have a job topping that next movie night,” he grinned. “I look forward to the attempt.” Thor left almost immediately after the movie, thanking them for sharing the day with him, although in truth, it had only been a few hours. 

"I wonder what he gets up to on his own. I hope he's not lonely," Steve mused out loud. 

Clint snorted. "Don't you worry about Thor. He came to earth and found a girlfriend in one day. Feisty, brilliant woman who ran over him with her van. After which her assistant tazed him. She's flying in – should be landing soon." His tone darkened. "Nat, can I crash on your couch? I might sleep better knowing someone who can cognitively recalibrate me if necessary is sleeping in the next room." Natasha nodded and went to get him some blankets. Clint cleared his throat. "Hey, uh. Cap. I just… I wanted to thank you. For trusting me. I tried to kill you, and you let me fight at your side. No questions asked. Means a lot to me. That you had my back. Just know, if you ever need it, I'll have yours." Affection filled Steve. He could do this. He could make this team. 

"I never doubted it. You're a good man, Clint. I'm glad to have you on my side." Steve chuckled lightly. "The rest of the team may not come together so easily. Natasha doesn't seem like she trusts easily. Neither do Banner and Stark, for that matter. Don't get me wrong, it sounds like they all got plenty-a reason, but it is gonna make my life a little more challenging. I don't think I understood how much I needed this. Not the fighting, like Loki said. But the team. I got nothin' here. Now. Also, I didn't realize until I saw this place how much I hate my place."

Natasha reappeared as though she'd been waiting for a cue. "We'll help you redecorate. Won't we, Clint? We'll stop by tomorrow, see what we have to work with." 

Steve took that as his cue to leave. "That'd be great. Come by anytime. I'm over -"

"We're spies, Cap. We know where you live." Natasha softened her words with a ghost of a smile. 

* * *

Clint, looking somehow both better and worse than the day before, whistled when he came into Steve's apartment. "No wonder you hate this place. It's awful."

Natasha swept in behind him. Her eyes alighted on the picture of Peggy he'd hung on one wall. "Who's the girl?" 

Steve felt grief wash over him. "That's, uh, Peggy Carter." He thought about saying more but decided against it. 

Clint cut off his thoughts anyway. "More importantly, who's the soldier?" He gestured at the only other personal item in the apartment: Bucky's photograph. 

The grief was piercing this time, strong enough that he had to shut his eyes against it and didn't see Natasha's eyes widen and then narrow at the picture. "That's Bucky Barnes. James Buchanan Barnes. He's – was – my best friend." 

Clint's reaction was much more pronounced than Natasha's had been. "Wow, _ this_ is Bucky Barnes? They didn't do him any justice at all in the comics. Musta had all the good artists working on you," Clint grinned. "Too bad. He was always my favorite. No offense. And I didn't even know how pretty he was." Steve looked up sharply. JARVIS had said it was fine now, but he hadn't been prepared to hear Clint just say outright that he thought Bucky was pretty. "I just loved that he was a sniper," Clint carried on without commenting on Steve's noticeable jolt. "Man, I thought he was the best thing since sliced bread. His picture can stay up. Hers too. Everything else in this depressing pit has to go." He looked Steve up and down. "Including your fashion sense. Come on Tash, it'll be fun."

She eyed the two of them speculatively. "Sure. Sounds like fun." Her tone was dry and her face held little expression. Steve realized all at once that, while he didn't know the mistakes his future self had referred to, he was already doing things differently. He had spent the time since thawing almost exclusively alone, finding no enjoyment in anything and no connection to anyone. He also knew himself well enough to know that without the fire lit by Bucky's potential survival, he would not have put much effort into getting to know Natasha or Tony. Clint, maybe. He had the makings of a soldier, not a spy, and he seemed the type to reach out first, especially given his gratitude towards Steve. With their closeness, Natasha may have followed, but it would've taken time, and Steve would've been a mostly passive participant. He hoped it would make whatever difference he apparently needed. 

They spent the day making Steve’s apartment livable. Natasha explained credit and debit cards and showed him how to figure out his financial situation. He had more money than he’d ever imagined, but he also knew that everything cost more now. She smirked and told him he’d get used to it, but also helped to steer him towards stores and options that wouldn’t break the bank. They stopped at a little Chinese restaurant for lunch, where Steve ate whatever Natasha ordered for him. 

After they made it back to his apartment with their purchases, Natasha took charge. Clint seemed content to let her lead. Just before they left, she instructed him to set up Steve’s TV and told Steve to come help her rearrange the furniture in the bedroom. He didn’t see the point – they’d arranged it all already, but followed willingly enough. She surprised him by pushing him down into a chair – which she wouldn’t have been able to do if he hadn’t already trained himself to regard her as a friend – and leaning so that she spoke directly into his ear. “Meet me for coffee at the cafe four blocks west of here tomorrow at 11 am. I need to talk to you.” 

He instantly recalled Tony telling him that SHIELD had undoubtedly bugged his apartment. Her reluctance to talk here was encouraging – maybe she would be willing to keep some things from SHIELD after all. To prevent her subterfuge from being in vain, he just nodded, then asked, “So do you think the chair should go on the other side of the bed? It’s no trouble to move it.” 

Her smile was bigger this time. “No, on second thought, I think you’ve done everything right.” She walked back to the living room. “Let’s go, Clint. I’ll let you buy me some ice cream. 

* * *

That night, Steve dreamed, as he so often did, of the day Bucky fell from the train. He woke, suppressing a scream, his arm thrown out in front of him. He glanced at the clock – 4:22 – and sighed. He could try to go back to sleep, but he knew it wouldn’t work. Instead, he decided to grab some breakfast and head for the gym, like he usually did, to pound out his frustration, guilt, and regret on the heavy bag. He stayed for a couple of hours, then walked back to his place. He was surprised to find that the changes made yesterday lifted his spirits a bit when he walked back inside. He picked up a history book to pass the time until he met Natasha. 

He got to the cafe a little early and sat down in a corner booth with his black coffee to wait. Natasha came in exactly on time, stopped at the counter for a frothy-looking iced coffee, and casually made her way over. She sat across from him and said nothing, sipping her drink. Then, abruptly, she said in a quiet voice, “Tell me about Bucky Barnes.” 

Steve couldn’t stop his gasp of surprise but tried to school his face. “I could talk all day about Bucky. You’ll have to be more specific.” 

“Who was he to you, really? His picture is one of only two personal items in your possession. I also want you to tell me what happened to him. Subtle isn’t your strong suit, Rogers. Whatever you feel about him runs deep, and it’s painful. I can’t explain yet, but I need you to trust me.”

This was the most emotion Steve had ever seen from her. Well, he needed to earn her trust, and she was giving him the perfect opening. “Trust goes both ways, Romanoff. But I’ll tell you, because someone has to trust first. Bucky was my best friend. My family in everything but blood. What do you know about me from before the serum?” 

“Not much.”

“I can count on one hand the number of people who really saw me.” Steve paused to look her up and down. “I suspect maybe you know a little of what that’s like. My mother worked herself to death trying to keep me alive after my father died. She took the jobs and shifts no one else wanted to keep food on the table and enough medicine to try and fix what was wrong with me. She did her best, but she wouldn’t’ve managed it without Bucky. While she was killing herself on the job, Bucky was pulling me outta fights I couldn’t win. Everybody loved Bucky. Clint wasn’t wrong when he said Bucky was pretty, though Buck might’ve objected to the word. He was tough and smart and handsome and charming. The dames loved him and the guys wanted to be him, hoping some of that magic might wear off, just a little. And he dragged me right along with him. Every date he went on, he got her to bring a friend so we could double. Every bully I picked a fight with, Bucky fought with, too. Right up to and including the Red Skull. The day I really became Captain America is the day I decided to go behind enemy lines, against orders, to rescue him when he was probably already dead. Howard Stark flew me over, and I jumped out of a plane that was being shot at and went up to a Hydra base armed with nothing but a prop shield to save him. It was crazy. I figured I might die. But for Bucky, I was willing to leave it all on the field, because I knew he woulda for me. I found him laying on a table where Zola had been experimenting on him or torturing him, I don't know which, mumbling his name, rank, and serial number over and over again. When we got back to camp, he followed me, same as always, hauling me outta trouble. He fell off a train in the mountains on a mission. After the serum, I thought that wouldn't happen anymore. Being too slow or too weak. But it did. All the times he saved me, and when I could finally keep up, I couldn't save him."

Natasha hesitated, then reached across the table and rested her hand on top of his. "You're right that trust should go both ways. I don't have that with many people. Clint's about it, really. You trusted me today, and you trusted him to fight with us, after Loki. I have some things I'd like to tell you, but I think they'll be hard for you to hear. You need to prepare yourself." 

Steve looked at her and made a snap decision. "I’m as ready as I’m likely to get. I’ve had a helluva few months, Natasha. I keep saying nothing else will surprise me, and things keep happening just to prove me wrong. Go ahead and say it, and I’ll pick up the pieces like I always do.”

“Clint recruited me for SHIELD in the fall of 2000. Before that, I was in the Red Room and working for the KGB in Russia. I was trained there from the age of 5, believing utterly in my cause. They did a lot of things to us there. Almost everyone thinks that Clint was my first real taste of kindness, but he wasn’t. A few years before he showed up, I was assigned a new teacher and told that I would become his field partner. The Soldier. At first, he was even colder than I’d been trained to be. He was not hiding his emotions; he was truly emotionless. I found out later he’d been brainwashed over and over and over. But the longer he trained me and the more we worked together, the more human he – we both – became. I fell in love – what I thought was love, at least. Though I was never innocent, I loved this older man with all the innocence of youth. He was the first time I ever felt anything resembling safety. He didn’t love me back, of course – I was a child – but he felt something for me that broke some of their programming of him. Perhaps he thought of me as something like a sister. Oh, he still followed orders, but he was kinder to me than they would have deemed necessary. His affection for me was discovered, of course. He was taken from me, I don’t know where. I didn’t see him again until a few years ago, I was escorting a nuclear engineer out of Iran. Someone shot out our tires and we went over a cliff. I pulled the engineer out, but he was standing there. I was covering the engineer with my body, but the Soldier shot him through me. He didn’t recognize me at all. I called him Yasha. I learned in your apartment yesterday that his real name was James Buchanan Barnes. I’m not sure how that’s possible, but the picture in your apartment is my Soldier. I’m sure of it.”

Steve just stared at her. He realized that she did look a little like Bucky’s baby sister. Maybe that had been enough to reach him. He thought this would probably be a lot more shocking if he hadn’t already been told Bucky was still alive, but he still had no idea how to respond. He’d already known he had failed Bucky, but a quick death was very different from decades of torture and brainwashing. He was saved answering by his new cell phone playing an unfamiliar song. After pulling it out of his pocket, he realized it meant someone was calling him.

“Rogers.”

“Hey, Rogers,” came Tony’s voice through the speakers. “I hear you’re getting a crash course on the brave new world without me. My very delicate feelings are wounded and now you’re going to have to make it up to me. I want your feedback on suits for the team. Maybe field test some stuff for me. Come to the tower.”

“Sure thing. I’m bringing a friend. See you in 20 minutes.”

Steve could hear Tony pause and parse his words as he watched Natasha silently raise one eyebrow at him. “Wow, you got to her this fast? Color me impressed, Cap. Guess batting those big blue eyes is more effective than I would’ve thought. Can’t wait for the story on that. Over and out, Rogers.”


	3. Good Company

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve and Natasha head over to Stark Tower, Steve meets another important person in Tony's life, and Steve and Clint have an interesting chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, this took a little longer than I wanted - I had a not so great mental health week last week, so writing took a back seat. But we’re back now! Also, I’m not so much a “plan things out in a detailed manner” kind of writer, so I don’t really know how long this is going to be. It’s only been like two days in-story, and we’re at the end of chapter 3. I think things are going to move a little faster after this, once we’ve gotten everyone sort of introduced and settled. I hope you enjoy it! Thanks to everyone who has commented/kudos’d – I really appreciate the encouragement!

The cab pulled up in front of the Tower, and Natasha quirked an eyebrow at him as they got out. "Stark is the one who called you?"

"Yeah, he said he has some gear upgrades for me to look over." Steve returned easily.

They entered the Tower; no one was around, but the elevator was waiting, and JARVIS greeted them. "Welcome, Captain. It is good to see you again. Please enter the elevator. It will take you to meet Mr. Stark." If Steve thought it was possible, he would've said that JARVIS's tone cooled. "Hello, Miss Romanoff. You may accompany Captain Rogers." Steve managed to keep a straight face, but he chuckled internally. It would seem that Tony's AI was awfully loyal. 

"Hey, Tony," Steve called warmly when they entered the room where he was waiting. "It's so funny that you called just now. Natasha and I were just having coffee and chatting. Before we get to any gear upgrades, I'd like you to hear what she was telling me." 

The slightest hint of annoyance ran across Natasha’s face. "I thought you said trust went both ways, Rogers."

"Oh it does, and when you're done talking, we have plenty that we'd like to share. But you're at something of a trust deficit in this room, Natalie, so you get to start." Despite her excellent and almost immediate recovery, Steve could tell he'd scored a point. He may not be a spy or a good liar, but he had plenty of experience reading people, and in his day, reading things wrong usually got him beaten to a pulp. 

"That's above your clearance. Did Stark tell you, or just hack the records for you?"

Steve laughed out loud. "Neither. I noticed when we stole that jet to go to the battle that most junior SHIELD agents pretty much do what I tell them to. I just explained that I'm more comfortable with paper copies and asked them to let me into the file room. I figured I should do at least a little prep work for our coffee today." 

Tony, who'd been quiet up to this point, huffed indignantly. "Well, hell Romanoff. It seems we and our fancy new tech just got schooled. And we've discovered another victim of the big blue eyes. C'mon, you show me yours, I'll show you mine." Natasha relented and told Tony all she'd told Steve about Bucky, though she showed less emotion than when she’d told Steve. Tony listened quietly through it all, then turned to Steve and nodded.

Steve cleared his throat. "Before I tell you any of this, I'd like your word that you won't tell SHIELD – not even Fury – and you won't discuss it anywhere other than this building. The reason why is part of the story, but I need your word first."

She seemed to hesitate. "What about Clint?" 

Steve grinned. Maybe she was ready for a team, after all. "We'll read him in. The rest of the team, too. We just -"

"You figured I was the one most likely to tell Fury, so you wanted me on board first. Smart. You have my word. So, have I proved myself worthy?"

Steve made the leap. "It was never about worthy, Nat. It was about loyalty. Yours to Fury runs deep, deeper than the rest of us. I knew I needed to be able to give you a good reason for loyalty to us to come first. Your story today happened to fit that requirement. I don't know if you've noticed," he couldn't help the smile; Natasha noticed everything, "but I'm not exactly the warrior stoic type. It probably seemed a little odd to you that I could tell you exactly what Bucky meant to me one minute, and then have virtually no reaction to your big reveal. I knew Bucky was still alive. I found out yesterday, from future me." He went through the whole story – minus the details of his future self's big reveal – and waited for her reaction. 

"So future you told you to trust me but not Fury?" This trust in her seemed to be the stickiest point to her. "Do you think he trusts me that much or Fury that little?" 

"Did you miss the part about future semi-thieves beating the shit out of us?" Tony interjected. "Because Captain America being all rah-rah team spirit isn't all that surprising to me."

Natasha brushed this off with a graceful wave of her hand. "I don't know the details, obviously, but it seems to me that at some point in the future, you – or maybe we – need some sort of major power source, and they came back to borrow these. Since they've apparently mastered time travel – thought apparently not theft, considering the debacle with the tesseract – they just brought it back when they were done. Makes sense. I don't think they beat the shit out of you intentionally; you were just in the way. You're sure it was really you? The last thing we need is to be taking directions from the enemy."

"JARVIS confirmed that he wasn't Loki and the things he knew… only I would know that." The palest pink that tinged his cheeks did not go unnoticed by his audience.

"Oh ho ho! He didn't blush when he told me before. He's blushing because you're a woman, which means it's about a woman! Now we have to get him drunk and get it out of him. What d'ya say, Romanoff, wanna help me corrupt a national treasure?"

Natasha gave the most genuine smile Steve had seen. He didn't love that it was sort of at his expense, but he'd take what he could get. "Look, it's not about a woman. And I can't get drunk. Besides, it appears that I never told you guys, or future me wouldn't have given it as evidence. It has to stay a secret." 

Tony, who seemed much more relaxed than yesterday, blew a raspberry at him. "Fine. Keep your secrets. So, the upshot is that we need to be a team, trust each other, so what, we have slumber parties? Paint each others' toenails?"

"We could train together," Natasha suggested. 

"Actually I was thinking movie nights." Tony and Natasha stared at him for a moment. "Look, we've done the whole forged in fire thing. More finely honed fighting skills will come with time. We need to get to know each other as people. I'd like us to start by bringing the rest of the team on this, but then, yeah. Movie nights. You guys pick your favorites to show Thor and me. We get dinner. Talk. Aside from Thor, none of you guys have really been on this kind of team. The bond that matters is formed off the battlefield. Then the battlefield reflects that. I know it's a lot to ask, but I'd also like help from both of you to find Bucky. I don't have any idea where to start. And if what Natasha says is true and he's been brainwashed into killing people, I don't know who I'll find at the end of my search."

Natasha continued to stare at him as though she were analyzing everything in him. "Call the rest of the team. We'll debrief tomorrow before Indian food and movie night. Let Clint pick the movie to make up for telling me first. Stark, I'll see you then." She paused. "Are you ready to go… Steve?" 

Before he could respond, Tony interjected, "You know, the new suit wasn't just a gimmick to get you guys over here. I actually do build things. Cap, wanna check it out, or do you have to get back before curfew?"

"I could probably make some time for you in my extremely busy schedule. Let's go. See you tomorrow, Nat." 

As they walked down to the lab, Tony squinted at Steve and gave an odd little half-smile. "So the indomitable Natasha fell in love with your best buddy. That weird for you?"

Steve laughed. "Actually, that's the most normal part of all this. Dames were constantly falling for Bucky. He liked them just fine, but I can't say I ever saw him fall for one."

"Turns out pretty handy, actually, that even brainwashed, he managed to crack the ice on the person on the team that we most needed to convince."

"Yeah, that's Bucky for ya. Always there for just exactly what I need." Steve sighed. The one time Bucky had needed him, he'd let him down. He had to make it up to him. Whatever it took, he'd find Bucky now and save him. 

"You know, Howard talked about Bucky. Don't feel bad, you were still his favorite, but I think he liked how nuts Bucky always went over his tech." 

"Yeah, Bucky was the one always reading those science fiction novels. He thought Howard's stuff was the best. Your lab would make him lose his mind." Steve cleared his throat. "I've been meaning to tell you, I'm sorry about your parents. I never met your mother, but I've seen pictures – you look like her. And Edwin. JARVIS said he died as well. He was a good man."

Tony just blinked at him for a moment, his face as unguarded as Steve had ever seen it. "You knew Jarvis? Really? He pretty much raised me. Didn't mention you. Guess he figured Howard talked enough for both of them."

Steve heard a lot that Tony didn't say. Never once had he called Howard his father. Of the three deaths, he'd only responded to Edwin's. Howard had apparently talked about him enough that Edwin refused to. He took a shot. "That's funny. No offense, but I always liked Edwin a lot more than Howard. Don't get me wrong, he was brilliant, and he helped me out a lot, but I never really… connected with him."

Tony shot him a wide-eyed look but said nothing as he pulled up some holograms of what appeared to be a new suit for Steve. They talked through suit upgrades, fabrics, designs, what gear might be best for the rest of the team, and the time just slipped away. Eventually, Steve’s phone made a dinging sound, and he pulled it out of his pocket.

“Ah, I see you replaced the brick. With a StarkPhone! Good choice.” Tony seemed genuinely pleased that Steve had picked a StarkPhone. 

“Great, can you tell me what the dinging means?”

“That’s a text message.” Tony tapped what looked a little text bubble from the comic strips Steve used to draw. “It’s like a… like a telegram, but instantaneous and directly to your phone.” 

As Tony tapped the text bubble, a window opened. 

_ This is Clint. Add my number to your phone. I’m coming over tomorrow at noon. I have a playlist for you and I’ll bring burgers. _

When Steve tapped it experimentally, a tiny keyboard appeared. “What does he mean add his number to my phone? And damnit, how did SHIELD think I was going to catch up using the stupid old phone they gave me? Gradual isn’t useful when it comes to tech. I just have to keep unlearning and relearning everything. The other phone didn’t have a keyboard. It had letters on each of the number keys. And I never needed to type anything. Plus the screen was tiny. And black and white. Do they think I’m afraid of color?” he groused.

Tony, on the other hand, grinned. “You ready for a tech tutorial without the training wheels, old man?” Steve nodded, still frowning at the phone. “You good for me to see the message you just got?” Steve nodded again, and Tony instantly made grabby hands at him. “Give it here, then. I’ll show you. Wait. Clint made you a _ playlist? _You’re starting on musical education without me? J, throw on some Black Sabbath. I can’t leave something this important to a guy who shoots arrows for a living. Okay, music can stay on in the background while we work through the phone how-to.”

Steve liked listening to Tony explain new tech. He was less enthusiastic about whatever music Tony had put on. It was fine, but it didn’t really resonate with him. He hoped Clint’s music was better. As they went on, he realized how useful the phone was going to be. He could look things up in real-time, instead of making a list of things to ask about later. For the second time, Steve’s time with Tony was interrupted by a stranger barging into the lab.

“What the hell, man? You can’t answer your phone after you fight aliens?” Steve looked up when he entered, but the annoyed- and concerned-looking black man didn’t even seem to notice him.

“Aw, don’t be mad, Sourpatch. I told you after the battle that I was fine.” Clearly deciding that distraction was the best technique here, he ducked behind Steve. “Here, meet Steve Rogers. Cap, meet Rhodey. He’s been my best friend since MIT, and then he abandoned the vastly superior world of engineering to become Colonel James Rhodes.” He stopped talking abruptly when Steve saluted. After JARVIS had spilled the beans on the gay rights movement, Steve decided to prioritize finding out what other civil rights changes had happened while he’d been on ice. He was grateful for that now, or he’d have been unable to hide his surprise at a black man making the rank of colonel. He wished he’d understood his phone better last night – it would’ve made the research a lot easier. Rhodey, who had clearly been so single-minded in his frustration with Tony that he’d missed the super-solider-sized blonde, looked a little dazed. Tony smirked at the two of them. 

“Steve Rogers... as in Captain America Steve Rogers?” he managed after a moment. 

“Yes, sir, Colonel,” Steve responded crisply, still at attention. 

“I mean I saw you on the news, but it’s still pretty surreal.” Rhodey finally seemed to notice that Steve was saluting him. “At ease. Jeez. And don’t salute me. It’s weird.” He turned to Tony. “Captain America just saluted me.” 

Tony’s smirk definitely widened at that. “You know, I haven’t seen him salute anyone else. You must be special. In fact, he has an amazing disregard for orders that no one ever seems to mention in the history books.” 

Steve shot him a mild glare and tried again. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Colonel.” He stuck out his hand. 

Rhodey took it with a look of mild disbelief. “The pleasure is all mine, Captain. You can call me Jim. Or Rhodey, since that’s what Tony calls me.”

“Then you have to call me Steve.” Rhodey looked a little awed that he was being allowed to call Captain America by his first name. Steve was starting to get used to this treatment – between Coulson and the junior SHIELD agents, he’d discovered that a lot of people were fans of the Captain America comic books and cartoons. 

“Snap out of it, Sugarbear. Be a little cooler.” 

At that, Rhodey stopped staring at Steve and narrowed his eyes at Tony. “You want me to snap out of it? Fine. Did you go to the hospital? How much sleep did you get last night? Have you eaten anything today?”

“Ugh, never mind. Go back to staring blankly at Cap.”

Steve cleared his throat. “Well, it is approaching dinner time. We were about done here if you guys wanted to get some dinner. I’m trying to figure out what food I like best. I’ve mostly been eating at the SHIELD mess.” He shrugged. “We used to boil everything, and didn’t usually have meat, plus we were rationing during the war, so SHIELD seemed like a big improvement, but according to Clint and Natasha, it’s maybe not as good as I thought. They took me to a Chinese restaurant yesterday, and we’re supposed to have Indian food tomorrow, but maybe you could suggest something else for me to try?” 

Both men stared at him for the briefest of moments; then Tony’s look transformed to dramatically betrayed, while Rhodey’s morphed to a smug sort of approval. “What do you think, Tony? Should we introduce him to the wonders of modern New York pizza?” 

Both Steve and Rhodey gradually relaxed as they ate pizza and chatted. Tony seemed happier than Steve had ever seen him. As Steve watched Tony do his best to shove Rhodey off the couch and onto the floor after Rhodey told one too many stories of Tony getting into scrapes at MIT, he wondered if this was what he and Bucky had looked like from the outside. As he left, he turned to Tony. “So I think maybe you and I have more in common than I thought.” Tony didn’t say anything; he just raised one eyebrow in question. “We’ve both spent most of our lives with a best friend named James who is constantly pulling us out of one scrape after another.” His lips quirked up in a half-smile, and he realized that he’d smiled more in the last two days than he had in the months since he’d woken from the ice, and that was including an alien invasion. “I’ll see you tomorrow with the rest of the team. I’ll bring Clint and Natasha. Do you know how to get in touch with Dr. Banner and Thor?” 

“You know, he’s going to get his feelings hurt if you call everyone by their first name except him. Call him Bruce. And sure, I’ll give him a call. Not so sure about Thor.” 

“Clint said something about a girlfriend. Maybe he knows how to get a hold of them. I’ll ask him tomorrow when I get my playlist.”

* * *

Steve dreamed of Bucky again, but this time, it was of the two of them at Coney Island. It was a nice change. When Clint arrived, he seemed a little uncomfortable, and Steve wondered if there was some kind of problem. He didn’t have long to wait.

“Okay, look, I’m a spy, but when I’m not undercover, I pretty much call it like I see it. So I wanted to talk to you about something. I called Bucky pretty when we were here yesterday, and you kinda reacted to that, so I’m just going to tell you right out. Things are not the way they were when you went under. I mean, I know you know that. But specifically, men liking other men is not the way it was when you went under. It’s legal to be gay now. It’s even legal to get married, at least some places. I wasn’t really thinking when I said it. I’ve never made much of a secret of the fact that I’m bi – bisexual, I like men _and _women – even when it got the shit kicked out of me. There’s a lot of bigots still out there, but I was kinda hoping you wouldn’t be one of them. I know times were different then, but – ”

“Clint,” Steve interrupted. “I need you to stop for one second. Take a breath. You did surprise me yesterday, I won’t lie. I’m not any good at it, anyway. But you didn’t surprise me for the reason you think. When I was growing up, no one woulda just said it like that. It was dangerous. Forget jail, it got you killed. But you absolutely do not have to worry about me being a bigot. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but I pretty famously hate bullies. When you said that Bucky was pretty, I thought it was amazing, how much things have changed.” He tried for a smile. He knew he was rushing, placing so much trust in his teammates, but he trusted his instincts. “Hating you would be a little hypocritical of me.” He waited as Clint’s eyes widened as that sunk in. 

“... oh. Wow. Okay. Captain America is… gay? Bi? Wow. I wish 12-year-old me could hear this.” 

“Gay, if I understand all the terminology correctly. Just men. Umm, I haven’t told anyone else. Although JARVIS knows, thanks to the recording of future me. He won’t tell, though. Apparently Tony programmed him against telling anyone, even him.” 

“Yeah, well that actually doesn’t surprise me. Stark was forcibly outed as bi in the papers as a teenager. Didn’t go over too well with his pops. Publicly, he’s only been with women since then. Anyway, not to worry. I won’t say anything. Although no one on the team would care. Nat obviously knows about me, Stark is bi, Asgardians don’t seem to care about anyone else’s sexuality except when they’re trying to get in their pants, and I’m pretty sure Bruce considers it the least of his worries. If you ever decide you want to tell people, I got your back. Boy, this is so much better than the conversation I came over here to have. Here, have a burger, we’ll put on a baseball game.”


	4. The Show Must Go On

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Team briefing, Steve catching up on culture a little bit, and a meeting with Fury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I realized that I had the wrong birth year for Natasha (I for some reason had it written down as 1974 instead of 1984), and that would’ve made her 13 when she met and fell in love with Bucky, which is creepy and gross, so I’ve made a few changes to Chapter 2. If you’d like to actually read it, it’s the paragraph that starts “Clint recruited me for SHIELD in the fall of 2000.” The summary is that she was 13, not 23 when they met, and she did fall in love with him in that 13-year-old who falls in love with a movie star or the cute older boy who lives down the street kind of way. Bucky is NOT a creepy predator and did not love her back, but thought of her as a sister and cared for her enough to be kind to her. Steve realizes that Natasha does actually look a little like Bucky’s baby sister. I have therefore also removed the Bucky/Nat tag. I also did a tiny bit of cleaning up of the previous chapters. Just little fixing of commas and typos and whatever.

When Steve and Clint swung by to pick up Natasha, Steve saw the two of them exchange a loaded glance that ended with Clint giving a tiny smile and Natasha looking at Steve with a nod. He assumed that was Clint’s way of telling Natasha that they were cool. Clint had apparently succeeded in getting in touch with Thor because he and Bruce were waiting at the tower when they arrived. 

As they walked over, they heard Tony. “Look, I’m just saying I have a lot of practice keeping my stuff out of the hands of the government. Tell Jane that if anyone gives her any trouble, she can give me a call. Scientists have got to stick together. And she’s one of the best. Ah, our SHIELD contingent is here. Well SHIELD and shield,” he mimed holding up a shield and gestured at Steve on the last word. “Who wants a drink?"

They settled into the couches and armchairs and, in the case of Clint, sprawled across the floor, leaning up against Natasha's legs where she sat on the loveseat next to Bruce. They went through the whole story, with only a couple of clarifying questions.

“Wait, so if he’s really from the future, shouldn’t him telling you shit mess everything up?” Clint asked. “Wouldn’t he change things enough so that he never comes back? But then he wouldn’t tell you and things would go back. Now I’m confused.”

Tony rolled his eyes. “That’s not actually how time travel works. Given that apparently time travel doesn’t defy the laws of physics – and I will definitely be taking a serious look at that later – coming back and changing things would create a branching reality. The other Steve’s future is already set because it’s already happened. That Steve and our – this Steve shared a timeline up until the point when they met, but now this Steve’s future is different. This Steve will never become that Steve because they’re no longer in the same time stream. He’ll become a different Steve. Depending on how big the change is, he may never travel back to the past at all.”

“I am not less confused, but whatever. No weird Back to the Future changes sounds good to me. You say don’t tell Fury, I trust you, Cap. I’m an excellent secret keeper.” 

Bruce looked between Steve and Natasha. "Well, I'm certainly not going to tell Fury. And considering the fact that you already told Natasha, it seems that you trust her not to. To be honest, I'd rather stay as far away from SHIELD as I can.”

Steve looked around. "Look, you've got no reason to follow my lead here, but it seems to me that if that's the only advice future me gives, it's awfully important. He seemed like he trusted you all, both on and off the field, but something about how he said it made me think that the trust took a little too long and something slipped through the cracks in the meantime. I know this doesn't automatically make us a team, but I'd like us to be." He cleared his throat. "Anyway, that's where we are."

“My question is where we do we go from here?” Natasha asked. “Clint, Steve, and I are going to be running missions for SHIELD,” Steve’s head popped up at that; it was news to him. Natasha continued without pause, though he doubted his response went unnoticed, “Tony spends half his time in Malibu, Bruce travels all over the world, and Thor doesn’t even live on this planet. How are we even supposed to spend enough time together to become a team?”

“Well I actually had an idea about that,” Tony responded. “I know I don’t generally play all that well with other people,” his eyes flickered over to Natasha almost too quickly to see, “but I think we have to commit to the team. It seems like things in the future get pretty shitty, considering my future self was willing to pull the pin on my arc reactor to get the tesseract. Maybe Cap’s right and we didn’t become a team fast enough. Bruce, I think you should skip globetrotting for a while and stay here in the tower. Come play in R & D, big guy. It’ll be the best time you ever had with your clothes on.” Bruce blushed and looked at the ceiling. “Thor, you can obviously stay here, since you don’t really have a home base on this planet. Jane, too, if you want. We’ll set her up with her own lab. Least I can do after you jolted me back to life. Then we have all our meetings here. Cap can go to Fury and tell him that I’d rather not meet at SHIELD headquarters. He’d buy that I’m petty enough not to want to go and diva enough to make Cap ask. I’ll take a little break from Malibu; Pepper can hold down the fort there – she goes back in a week or so. I can even get a gym and training center set up here. And Cap wants to have movie nights.” He turned to Steve with a smirk.

“Your invitation is most welcome, Anthony. With the tesseract missing and the Bifrost broken, I do not know how long I will be unable to return to Asgard. And I do not like the hotel where Jane and I have been staying. Everything is so breakable. The furniture is much hardier on Asgard.” Bruce choked a little on his drink at Thor’s pronouncement. 

Natasha actually cracked a smile. “Gutter brain,” she said softly. It took Steve another moment, but then his eyes widened and he looked over at Thor, who looked rather smug at this reaction. 

“Um, actually, staying here for a bit would be great,” Bruce said, clearly trying to change the topic. I’m not sure what exactly I’d like to do next. Thanks, Tony.”

Steve thought through Tony’s suggestions. He noticed that he, Clint, and Natasha were not invited to live in the tower and wondered whether that was because they already had living quarters or because Tony didn’t really want them there. He certainly had reason to distrust Natasha, and it was pretty obvious that she and Clint were a set. Steve knew he’d have his work cut out for him turning this group of six independent, stubborn, mistrustful people into a team. All this flitted through his head so quickly that there was no noticeable pause before he replied, “So Natasha suggested Indian food for dinner if that's okay with you all, and Clint was charged with picking a movie."

"A responsibility I take very seriously. I brought _ Die Hard._ It's a classic. You'll love it." 

"Nice choice, Robin Hood. The quintessential ‘80s action flick. Load ‘er up. J, put in an order for food. Everyone make requests.” 

Clint was right. Steve loved the movie. After it was over, Thor left to meet Jane, and Steve talked the others into giving him some book recommendations – he’d only read non-fiction since he woke up – and Tony and Clint told him that he should watch some TV shows. Tony was angling for _ Star Trek,_ while Clint pushed something called _ Avatar: The Last Airbender._

While the two of them were bickering about it, the elevator door opened, and both Pepper and Rhodey walked in. Pepper visibly faltered seeing the five of them spread across the room, but Rhodey took it in stride. Tony lit up at their entrance. “Back me up here, Rhodey. Cap needs to watch _ Star Trek,_ right?” 

“Look,” Clint interjected before Rhodey could answer, “I get it. I even like _ Star Trek._ But _Avatar _is amazing. It has the best characters and good representation and a giant flying bison and the relationships are meaningful. And hands down the best character arc ever. Plus it’s all about a team, which should resonate with the good Captain.”

Pepper looked confused. “_Avatar_? Like the blue aliens?” 

Clint gasped. “Oh my god NO, not the stupid movie. The TV show. _ Avatar: The Last Airbender_.” 

Steve was relieved. He’d had about enough of aliens for a while. “I’ll just watch both. It’s fine. Hey, Jim,” he said with a nod, receiving one in return. “Ma’am,” he said to Pepper, the palest of pink tinging his cheeks as he avoided eye contact with her. Tony narrowed his eyes and opened his mouth, probably to comment on the blush, but Steve cut him off. “Do either of you have any book or TV recommendations? I’m trying to catch up.” 

“Well my favorite book of all time is _ Pride and Prejudice,_ but maybe that’s not your taste,” Pepper said with a tiny smile. 

“Oh, I’ve, um, actually already read it,” Steve replied. “That one’s actually older than me. It’s wonderful. I, uh, may have related to Lizzy straining against being told what to do because of things she couldn’t change.” 

She let out a surprised giggle. “There are movie versions now. Several, actually. The BBC one with Colin Firth is my personal favorite, but the Keira Knightly one is great, too.” The rest of the Avengers and Rhodey were watching this exchange with interest. 

After a pause, Rhodey chimed in. “I don’t read a lot of fiction. I’m a big _Iliad_ and_ Odyssey fan_, but those are older than you too. _ The Hobbit and__ Lord of the Rings _is definitely worth the time, too. You can probably skip the rest of Tolkien”

“Wait, _ Lord of the Rings _is Tolkien? _ The Hobbit _was one of my favorites. I enjoyed the _Iliad _a lot, too. Too bad there are no sequels to that,” he chuckled. 

“There’s always _ The Song of Achilles,_” Tony suggested with a smirk, “but it might be too much for your ‘40s sensibilities.” 

Steve frowned, but Pepper, who apparently understood whatever Tony was implying, interrupted. “Anyway, we just stopped by so Rhodey could say goodbye. I’m going to drive him to the airport.”

It was Tony’s turn to frown. “You sure you can’t stay, Platypus? I’m sure we could convince Cap to let you join the superfriends team. Once we take all the Hammer trash off your suit, you’d be a good addition.”

“You have an Iron Man suit?” Steve asked, trying desperately to interpret what Tony was saying.

Tony answered first. “Yeah, he does, but he decided to let the Air Force outfit it with substandard Hammer weapons.” 

“Umm… there’s a hammer on your suit?” Steve was getting more confused by the second.

Tony scoffed, but it was Rhodey who responded. “No, sorry, weapons designed by Justin Hammer. And it’s not like I had a lot of options. They wanted more guns. You don’t make guns anymore. Anyway, I’m happy where I am, but you can always call if you need me. Maybe before the world actually ends next time, okay?” He gave Tony a stern look, then a hug, then waved to everyone and left with Pepper. 

Tony took advantage of the silence and turned to Steve. “This happened last time you met Pepper, too. You get all stammery and blushy and weird. Why aren’t you scared of Natasha? She’s the one who could kill someone with a bobby pin. Don’t get me wrong, Pepper can be scary, but mostly only in the boardroom, which you can easily avoid. What’s the deal? Come on, cough it up.”

“He doesn’t see me as a woman. He sees me as an agent. Happens a lot,” Natasha said with a shrug.

“That’s not it! Actually, I think it’s that you remind me so much of Peggy. Peggy Carter,” he clarified for the rest of the room. “She trained me out of stammering at her, especially on the job. She couldn’t afford for anyone to take her less than 100% seriously. She might’ve beaten the lesson into me a little.” Steve rubbed the back of his head with a reminiscent grin, as though he could feel the ghost of a swat. “I’ll admit, taking a punch didn’t usually help me learn any lessons, but Peggy was special, and she’d earned a spot where people took her seriously. Besides, I tried to mostly do what she said after that time she shot at me.”

Natasha raised one eyebrow, but Tony responded first. “Yeah, that sounds like Aunt Peggy.” Steve jolted a little and looked at Tony, who was not looking back. He supposed it was reasonable the Howard and Peggy had stayed close after the war, but he hadn’t thought about it in terms of Tony. 

“Wait, why did she shoot you?” Bruce looked totally perplexed. Steve laughed and told the story of first picking up his shield. 

“Eugh, you accused her of _fonduing _with Howard? No wonder she shot you.” Tony seemed deeply offended on Peggy’s behalf. 

“Yeah, that’s fair, but I gotta say, I don’t think getting attacked by the secretary was really Steve’s fault,” Clint said. 

“Thank you! She _ really _ wasn’t my type.” Steve wrinkled his nose. “Anyway, Peggy didn’t hold a grudge, but I did learn how to talk to her. Besides, you deserve to be taken seriously at SHIELD.”

Natasha smirked. “I appreciate that, but trust me, no one would take me any less seriously if you started stammering at me. Breaking men is what I’m best at. I’m going to head out. Steve, Clint, want to share a cab back to base?”

After they all made it back to their respective apartments, Steve pulled out the computer that Natasha had helped him buy and started in on some research. He put Clint’s playlist on in the background and set out to figure out the library system. He had some reading to do. 

* * *

Steve ended up spending most of the next day at the Schwarzman library on 5th Avenue. The building had apparently been there since before him, but he’d never been in. As it was a weekday, there weren’t very many patrons, and the group of librarians was more than happy to help Steve figure out the system. He checked out a dozen books along with several movies, including both versions of _ Pride and Prejudice._ As he walked back to his apartment, he spotted an art store and decided to take a look. He hadn’t really been driven to draw since he woke up, with the brief exception of his time in Tony’s lab, but the shop intrigued him. He couldn’t believe all the new kinds of equipment and techniques. Paints, chalk, charcoal, pencils. It was all a little overwhelming, and the staff here weren’t nearly as helpful as the librarians had been. In the end, he decided to stick with just a sketchbook and some drawing pencils, then come back after he’d done more research. 

Over the next couple of weeks, Steve kept mostly to himself, although he did spend plenty of time at the SHIELD gym. He watched both versions of _ Pride and Prejudice and_ decided he agreed with Pepper that the BBC version was better. He made his way through _ Avatar _ (which Clint joined him for) and started on the original _ Star Trek._ He’d discovered at the library that they had made movies of the _ Lord of the Rings,_ but he wanted to read the books first. He’d also gotten _ The Song of Achilles,_ though he hadn’t started it yet. He knew Tony had been making fun of him in some way and figured the only way to understand what he’d meant was to read the book. 

He had noticed that a lot of people expected him to be a lot more… hateful than he was. Things had changed a lot, but as far as he was concerned, it was mostly for the better. They seemed to have forgotten that he’d been fighting against bullies his whole life, and in his experience, there was a pretty significant overlap between bullies and people in power. His first major fight as Captain America hadn’t been against Nazis, but against his superior officers, who’d wanted to cut Gabe Jones and Jim Morita from his squad. 

He found himself sketching more and more, mostly pictures of Bucky and Peggy with the rest of the Howling Commandos sprinkled in, but eventually, he started trying to sketch his new team. He didn’t know them as well, so they mostly remained vague outlines. He hadn’t realized how much he wanted the Avengers to become his new Howling Commandos. He would never want to replace the amazing men he had served with, but he knew he wasn’t really meant to be an island. He’d spent most of his life with just Bucky and his mother, then most of what was left with just Bucky, but the time he’d had with the Commandos had made him happy, despite the horrors of what was going on around them. That was the first time in his life he’d felt he really belonged anywhere, and it came from leading a team. SHIELD had already told him that they were all dead, but he knew that when he was a little less raw about it, he’d want more information about how they’d lived. He wanted to know what they’d done and whether they had families. Maybe he’d even see if he could meet some of their families and hear about them from a more personal source. 

Eventually, his solitude was disrupted when Natasha came and knocked on his door. “Fury would like to speak with you,” she said with no preamble. 

“This wouldn’t happen to be about some SHIELD missions that I’ll apparently be running with you and Clint, would it? It would’ve maybe been nice if he’d talked to me about it before he told you I would do it,” Steve replied, grabbing his leather jacket from the closet and his keys and wallet from the bowl on the table by his door. 

Once at SHIELD, Natasha left him in front of Fury’s office with nothing but one raised eyebrow. He gave a perfunctory knock and entered the room. “What can I do for you, Sir? Another mission, perhaps?”

“Actually, Captain, I wanted your thoughts on the team. I hear you guys had a little get-to-know-you gathering. I’m curious how that went for you.” Fury leaned back in his chair with his hands folded in his lap. 

Steve wondered exactly where Fury had gotten that information and decided to go with as much truth as he could. “I’m not sure how many of them are ready for a real team, but I’d like to give it a shot. They’ve got pretty different personalities, but I think those sometimes make the best teams. Maybe you have more fights, but you’re generally more effective. We’re going to have a barrel full of trust issues, but I think we can crack it. I’d like to continue working with them, meeting and training and discussing strategy.”

Fury nodded as though he’d expected as much. “We’ll be happy to set up some scheduled training for you and set aside time in the conference – ”

“Actually, sir, Stark indicated that he’d be… uncomfortable pursuing this at SHIELD. He didn’t really say why, but I don’t think it does any harm to cooperate with him here. When we spoke a couple of weeks ago, he said he’d set up a training floor. I expect it’ll be crawling with robots by now,” Steve chuckled. 

Fury, on the other hand, did not crack a smile. “Well, I suppose that’s alright for now. I’d like you to get started training with Romanoff. You’re strong and you’ve got a lot of practical fighting experience, but that’s not always going to be enough. You can train here or at Stark’s. The team is your first priority. You make it clear to Stark that he should appreciate you fighting his battles for him.”

“All due respect, Sir, that’s my job as their captain, and I take it very seriously. That’s what makes a team.”


	5. Don't Stop Me Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve starts working with Natasha, but she's a tough nut to crack. This chapter also deals with the Mandarin, and Steve learns something interesting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, this is so much later than I wanted. I had a really solid idea of how I wanted it to start and how I wanted it to end, but then I had to rewrite the middle a couple of times to get it to fit right. Turns out it's pretty hard to figure out what would happen in the MCU if the Avengers actually talked to each other. On the plus side, it’s almost twice as long as my usual chapters. 
> 
> Second, all of the titles in this story have been/will be Queen songs. For the most part, they’re just representative of what’s happening in the chapter, but there will be some that focus on Steve’s relationship with a particular character and the chapter is named with whatever song I’ve decided to have as that character’s sort of theme song. This chapter is Tony! There are some that came to me pretty easily (like this one!), but I would LOVE to hear ideas for Queen theme songs for any of the characters. Let me know in the comments :)

_I'm a shooting star, leaping through the sky_   
_Like a tiger defying the laws of gravity_   
_I'm a racing car, passing by like Lady Godiva_   
_ I'm gonna go, go, go  
There's no stopping me_

_I'm burnin' through the sky, yeah_   
_Two hundred degrees_   
_That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit_   
_ I'm traveling at the speed of light  
I wanna make a supersonic man out of you_

_ -Don’t Stop Me Now, Queen _

In addition to his drawing, the team’s movie nights, his regular training, and his attempts to catch up on 70 years of missed popular culture, Steve started sparring regularly with Natasha. He was actually pretty excited about it. He’d never had time for formal training – he’d gone right from the lab to the chorus line to Nazi Germany. Thanks to the serum, he’d managed just fine. His reflexes, flexibility, and strength were all heightened, and he’d always had a mind for strategy. Up until the Battle of New York, as it was being called, he’d only ever fought against the Red Skull and people weaker than him. He hadn’t really needed to be a superior fighter, but now, he knew he needed every advantage he could get. Natasha, on the other hand, often fought against people physically stronger than her – she hadn’t even hesitated to fight the aliens with enhanced strength – but her prodigious skill allowed her to best nearly anyone. 

He could feel his skills improving as they worked, but he didn’t feel like he was making as much progress cracking the outer shell Natasha always kept in place. They rarely talked much during their actual sparring, and she usually declined to join him for any one-on-one activities. 

Clint was a totally different story. Bonding with Clint was easy – definitely the easiest thing Steve had done in this century. He still missed Bucky fiercely, but over the next several months, Clint filled in some of the holes of emptiness he’d been living with since waking up. Steve wasn’t quite ready for everyone to know he was gay, but it was nice having someone he could talk to, and Clint made it so easy. He brought Steve to the roof of an apartment building to watch the Pride parade that June. Steve couldn’t believe how amazing everything was and promised himself he would be brave enough to go next year.

The two of them also stealthily joined the relief efforts throughout New York. Knowing that their appearance would cause the press to flock and slow down any work, they went in civilian clothes – Clint made Steve go shopping first so he wouldn’t give himself away with what he referred to as Steve’s old-man-clothes – and tried not to draw any extra attention to themselves. Rebuilding New York took most of the summer, and when fall rolled in, Steve found himself missing the feeling that came with helping in a non-fighting capacity, so he started volunteering other places when he found himself at loose ends: homeless shelters, soup kitchens, and the only place he wore his Captain America uniform – children’s hospitals. Sometimes he dragged the other Avengers with him to the hospital. Iron Man and Thor were always exceptionally popular, and he found himself surprised at how Natasha softened when faced with little girls who wanted to be superheroes just like her. 

Tony told them that Pepper was back in California, but she’d asked him to pass on how pleased she was with the good PR that came from the team visiting hospitals, especially since Tony hadn’t let her publicize the money he’d poured into the relief efforts. Steve had spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to spend more time with Tony so they could maybe be closer friends. He finally found a winning tactic when he asked Tony if he could come to his lab and draw the suits; Tony agreed with the stipulation that he got to pick the music. Over the next several months, Steve ended up spending a lot of time there, and he watched as Tony went from a handful of working suits to dozens. He knew that Tony had a lot of time commitments, and he saw how long it took him to work on projects; there was no way Tony was sleeping through the night. But then, it wasn't like Steve always slept through the night, either. 

Completely separate from wanting to bond with each of his teammates, Steve grew to love his time in Tony’s lab. Mostly they were silent, with nothing but the sound of whatever loud music Tony had put on that day, but with the way Tony sank into whatever project he was working on, Steve got to watch him without worrying about what Tony would think of it. And boy, he had started to love watching Tony. He was never still – even when he was thinking and not actively working on the project, he couldn’t seem to stop his hands from moving and tinkering. He danced along with the music and Steve couldn’t tell if he was really that unselfconscious or if he had actually gotten so caught up that he’d forgotten that Steve was there. Sometimes, Steve started drawing Iron Man only to flip to a new page and draw Tony in the lab instead. Tony never asked to see the drawings he did there, and Steve never volunteered. 

Occasionally, they did talk. Steve could tell that Tony’s favorite stories were the ones Steve told about Edwin Jarvis. He worried sometimes that when he ran out, he’d have nothing left to say that Tony would want to hear, but that turned out to be wrong. Tony also loved hearing about the scrapes he and Bucky had gotten into and the ones Steve got into while Bucky wasn’t paying attention (“And to think that I would’ve thought signing up for a top-secret government experiment would top the list,” Tony said wryly).

Steve’s favorite was when Tony talked him through various new tech – they covered everything from smartphones and video games to armor and weapons for the team. He loved the way Tony lit up and bounced when he talked tech. He talked with his whole body and leaned into the role of instructor. He seemed to appreciate how quickly Steve picked things up and laughed when Steve groused about the lack of help SHIELD had been. When Tony asked, Steve handed over his phone to let Tony tinker with it. He promised that SHIELD would no longer be able to monitor Steve’s phone usage, and they’d only hear conversations that Steve had in otherwise monitored locations. “Won’t Fury be suspicious if they suddenly can’t see what I’m doing anymore?” 

“Nah. I mean probably, he’s a spy, so he’s suspicious of everything. But no more than anything else. He’ll either assume that you got fed up trying to learn the tech or that I SHIELD-proofed it because I didn’t want him spying on me.” Steve nodded. He was interested to learn how many people underestimated his brain. He’d thought that when he got the serum, people would stop underestimating him, but they just shifted their focus. Turns out, you couldn’t get rid of people’s preconceived notions about you. 

They also talked about books. Tony laughed through Steve's analysis of the battle plans in _ Lord of the Rings _and smirked a little when Steve asked him to tell Pepper she was right about the BBC _ Pride and Prejudice_. "I, uh, actually read the one you recommended. _ The Song of Achilles _." Steve looked up at Tony from under his lashes in time to see his eyebrows shoot up to his hairline. 

"Well color me shocked. And?"

"I loved it. I thought it was an amazing lens on Achilles' and Patrocles' relationship. And her writing was wonderful. Thanks for the recommendation." Steve smirked internally at Tony's obvious surprise.

"Well. Good. I'm glad you liked it." Tony went back to what he was working on and Steve went back to sketching, but he caught Tony glancing over at him for the rest of the afternoon. 

* * *

One afternoon, after Steve had been coming by to sketch for a few months, Tony seemed more jittery than usual. He wouldn’t make eye contact and he turned the music up so they wouldn’t be able to talk. Steve knew he could wait Tony out, so he settled in on the couch where he usually set himself up. After a couple of hours, Tony cracked. “J, music off. So, um, I wanted to tell you something. I mean I don’t want to, but I think I should. I mean you should know, I just wish someone else would tell you. But I can’t think of anyone who would. Or could. Anyway, it’s about Aunt Peggy.” That was maybe the last thing that Steve had expected. “I don’t know how much you know about her life after you went into the ice. But, um, she got married.” Tony said all this very fast, and it occurred to Steve that he thought it would hurt Steve to hear about Peggy loving someone else.

“I’m glad,” Steve said gently. “I, uh, I get the impression that you’re concerned about upsetting me. I’m glad Peggy got married. He would’ve had to have been pretty special for her to get married. She deserved special. But she and I weren’t… I wasn’t in love with her.” Tony’s head shot up from where he’d been staring at his desk. “She was the first dame – woman – I could really talk to, and I know that we got painted as sort of star-crossed lovers in a lot of the stories. And maybe, if things had been different, I would’ve loved her. I like to think we could’ve made each other happy. I’m sorry I never got to see all the amazing things she did. And I miss her… very much. But I don’t think she was really meant for me.” He’d gotten good at these sorts of half-truths a long time ago – talking about women without giving away that he had no real interest in them. He felt like he should tell Tony he was gay, but he wasn’t ready. But then again, maybe this was one of the things his future self had meant that he should trust Tony with. It had all just been easier with Clint, somehow. Clint had said something first, been ready to take on Captain America if it turned out that Captain America was a bigot. Still, trust Tony. Steve shook his head. “That was a lie.”

Tony looked confused by Steve’s abrupt statement. “So you _did _love her? That was all to… what, make you sound tough? I don’t get it.” 

“No, no, that part was true. It’s true that I didn’t love her. It’s a lie that we could’ve made each other happy. I would never have been happy with her. I wanted to be. Really wanted to be.” 

“So what, she loved you more than you loved her? You really did dig the blond secretary but you felt guilty?” This was the most flustered that Steve had ever seen Tony, and they’d fought aliens together. Steve wanted to fix it – he could see that confusion was a hard thing for someone as smart as Tony – but he was having a hard time actually saying the words. 

“No, nothing like that. I mean… okay. When you were at MIT, when you had a crush on someone, did you tell Jim?” 

“I refuse to accept Jim as a substitute for Rhodey. But yeah, sure. If he hadn’t already figured it out, sure, I told him. What does that have to do with Aunt Peggy?”

“The message from the future, the thing about myself that no one else knew was who my first crush was. My first crush that I never told anyone about, not even Bucky. I never told anyone because I couldn’t.” Steve could see the tiny changes in Tony’s expression as he started to connect the dots. “I couldn’t tell anyone that the first person I liked as more than a friend was named Matthew.” 

Neither of them spoke for a moment, just breathing quietly. The longer the silence went on, the tenser Steve got. Suddenly, Tony started to laugh. Steve was rather taken aback. He hadn’t known what to expect, but it wasn't laughter. He straightened his spine, realizing he’d been leaning closer and closer to Tony as he talked. He’d started gathering up his things when Tony grabbed his wrist with one hand as he waved the other frantically. 

“No, no, Jesus, I’m sorry. I just… my whole life, my dad held you up as this paragon of everything I’d never be, and trust me, straight was definitely on the list. It just hit me all at once – every comparison he made, everything I ever hated you for, and he never really knew you at all. No wonder he never liked me. All he had to compare me to was some cardboard cutout in his head that never even existed.”

“He knew Captain America, Tony. He didn’t know shit about Steve Rogers.”

* * *

After that, he and Tony grew even closer, and with Tony came Bruce. With all the time that Steve was spending at the Tower, he got to know Bruce a lot better. They had more in common than Steve would’ve thought. He was just as brilliant as Tony, in his own way, but he tended to move through life a lot slower, which Steve really appreciated. He lacked Tony’s impulsivity and boldness – he didn’t really have the luxury of either. Steve had his own moments of boldness, but they were usually a result of stubbornness, not impulsivity. They shared a love of tea and jazz, and Steve felt like he could be quiet with Bruce in a way he couldn’t be with anyone else. So much about this time period was too fast for Steve, so it was nice to slow down sometimes. Steve also used it as an opportunity to talk to Bruce one-on-one about training. “I know you’re not comfortable training with us, at least not here, but I’d like the opportunity for us to make the Other Guy,” Steve had learned that was how Bruce preferred to refer to the Hulk, “a real part of the team. It’s possible we’ll have to work together in the future, and I want to make that as easy on you as possible.”

Bruce was thoughtful. “You know, Steve, I think that if we could get to a safe enough area, that would be alright. He likes you. He saved Tony for me – we’re linked enough that he could tell how important Tony was to me, and he liked that Tony made me feel sort of okay about the whole thing. But he definitely liked you the best. You treating him like part of the team made a big difference.” 

Spending time at the Tower also put him in the path of Thor. Thor was easy to like, and although he was clearly used to being in charge, he seemed content to follow Steve’s lead as part of the Avengers. 

Steve really felt like the team was coming together. He just had to work on Natasha. 

* * *

In mid-December, Steve was making dinner one day with the news on his TV in the background. He hadn’t been paying much attention to it – he was mostly thinking about what exciting things he could do for Christmas at the children’s hospital – when Tony’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

“Here’s a little holiday greeting I’ve been wanting to send to the Mandarin. I just didn’t know how to phrase it until now. My name is Tony Stark and I’m not afraid of you. I know you’re a coward. So I’ve decided that you just died, pal. I’m gonna come get the body. There’s no politics here, just good old-fashioned revenge. There’s no Pentagon, it’s just you and me. On the off chance that you’re a man, you can find me in the tallest tower in New York. It’s got a great big A on it. Pretty easy to spot. I’ll leave the door unlocked.”

Steve sat there in shock for a moment, then pulled out his phone and called Tony. He picked up after only half a ring. “Yeah, I know, don’t start, Rogers,” he grumbled in place of a greeting. 

“You invited a terrorist to your Tower in the middle of New York City. A building where hundreds of civilians work every day. You wanna tell me what the hell just happened?”

“He blew up Happy. In Malibu. Pepper just called and told me. He’s in the hospital. She’s with him now. I told them to put on _ Downton Abbey_. It’s his favorite.” 

Steve didn’t hesitate. “I’ll meet you at the Tower with Clint and Natasha in ten minutes. We’ll figure it out.” 

* * *

As soon as Steve walked in, Clint and Natasha behind him, Tony started to talk. “Look, I know what you’re thinking, but – ”

“If you’re going with ‘but,’ you clearly have no idea what I’m thinking,” Steve cut in. “You do remember I’m the same guy who planned to drive a stolen Jeep behind enemy lines to rescue a guy who was probably dead, right? They came for Happy. Any idiot can see he’s your family. And if they fuck with you, they fuck with us. We’re a team now. So skip the apologies. What do you know?” 

Tony looked taken aback. “You said fuck.” 

Steve sighed. “You seem to have forgotten a lotta things about me. I was also a soldier in World War II. It’s fine. Status?”

Tony seemed to snap back to himself a little bit. "At this point, not much. I have JARVIS analyzing the data to see if we can get a pattern of the Mandarin's attacks. Rhodey is working on it for the government. Aside from the bombing with… with Happy, the media has only reported on three. There have actually been six more that weren’t made public.” 

“Sir, if I may?” JARVIS asked. He continued when Tony waved a hand. “There were military dog tags at the scene of the bombing in Malibu belonging to a Mr. Jack Taggart, but no individuals by that name have been listed among the dead or injured. I have also been unable to detect the remains any explosives at the scene. I have searched my database, and this most closely resembles an explosion that occurred four years ago in Rose Hill, Tennessee, which predates any known Mandarin attack. An ex-army soldier named Chad Davis caused an explosion, killing himself and five other people. I beg your pardon, but Miss Potts is calling.” 

“Put her through, J. Hey Pep, you’re on speaker with the Avengers. Don’t tell any embarrassing stories. How’s Happy?”

“No change. I’m actually calling because you have a visitor. She says her name is Maya Hansen. I was at the office, on my way out and she asked to talk to me.” Steve saw a flicker of recognition cross Tony’s face.

“Maya Hansen? What on earth does a botanist want with me? I mean besides the obvious.” Tony winked at the rest of the room. 

“She says she needs your help. She thinks her boss is working for the Mandarin.” Steve’s eyes shot to Tony, who hesitated, then nodded. 

“Miss Potts? This is Steve Rogers.” He saw Tony smirk slightly. “I’m going to have Natasha Romanoff and Clint Barton come out to you. They’ll get some more information from Miss Hansen and make sure the two of you are safe. Will you let us know if anything else happens?” As soon as Steve finished, Natasha and Clint nodded and headed for the roof. 

“A quinjet is on the way. We’ll be there as soon as we can.”

“Um, yes, sure thing. Thank you. Tony, you and I are going to have a discussion later that you will not enjoy, about things like threatening a terrorist on national television and not telling me about it.”

“Yeah, can’t wait. Be careful, Pep.” 

After he hung up with Pepper, Tony turned to Steve. “Okay, so the spy twins are going to Malibu, apparently. Do you have plans for the rest of us, oh fearless leader?” 

“I’d like for you to go to Tennessee and see if you can figure anything out about the explosion that happened there, if that’s alright with you. You can get there the fastest, except for Thor, and I think you’re better suited for investigation. I’m going to coordinate from here for now. Bruce, I’d like you to help with any… scientific… things,” Steve cracked a smile at Tony’s accompanying snort, “from here. I’d also like to keep Thor with us so we have a flier. You said Jim is working this from his end?” 

“No, I said Rhodey is working it from his end. They’re trying to trace the Mandarin’s signal. He’s going to different locations. So far, it hasn’t done much good. Anyway, yeah, your plan sounds fine. I’ll head to Tennessee. I’ll let you know what I find out.” 

Tony suited up and blasted off, leaving Steve alone with Thor and Bruce. He called SHIELD, talked to a few different people who were no help at all, then settled in with Thor to wait for Natasha and Clint’s report while Bruce worked with JARVIS to analyze some of the data from the Mandarin’s explosions. 

* * *

A few hours later, Steve's phone rang. "Hey, Clint, what've you got?"

"A problem. Pepper and Maya are gone, and Pepper's cell phone is on the ground near her car."

"Shit. Okay, we have to assume they were taken. Excuse me, JARVIS? Miss Hansen told Pepper that her boss was working for the Mandarin. Do you know who her boss is?"

"Miss Hansen is currently working for a think tank by the name of Advanced Idea Mechanics, which is run by Aldrich Killian. If I may, sir, Miss Potts had a meeting with him a few days ago. He wanted Stark Industries to invest in a project he called Extremis. Miss Potts declined." 

“JARVIS, do you happen to have any surveillance footage from when they were taken?” Immediately, video footage displayed on the wall. Steve, Bruce, and Thor watched as Pepper saw Killian, told Maya to run, and was grabbed. They also watched as Maya stepped up to Pepper and took her cell phone and threw it away. 

“So I guess Maya wasn’t exactly innocent. Do we think they wanted Tony?” Bruce asked. 

“Without having to deal with the security in this building and the possibility of other Avengers. Much easier to grab Pepper and wait for him to fly to the rescue,” Steve responded. “The question is, why do they want Tony? Just because he threatened the Mandarin?”

Bruce took his glasses off and started to clean them. “JARVIS, do you know what Killian’s Extremis project is?” 

“Yes, Dr. Banner. I have a recording from Aldrich Killian’s meeting with Miss Potts.” 

“Bruce, can you work with JARVIS to figure out what the hell these people were working on? I’m guessing they want Tony because they hit a wall and need someone smarter than them to fix it. Half-finished tech can still be dangerous, though, so I’d like to know what we’re heading into. Clint, can you and Nat talk to SHIELD, see if they have any information on Killian. They were pretty useless on the Mandarin, but having an actual name might help. See if you can figure out where they took Pepper. JARVIS, can you patch me through to Tony?”

“I am sorry, Captain, but I am not in contact with the Mark 42 suit.”

Steve and Bruce exchanged a glance. “Shit. Bruce, if it’s alright with you, I’d like you to stay here and keep working. It’s not that I – ”

Bruce was nodding as soon as Steve got the words out. “Go, I’ll figure it out. Keep your comms on. Let me know when you find him.”

* * *

Steve and Thor touched down in Tennessee at Tony’s last known coordinates. The ground was covered in snow and they found impressions where what looked like something human-sized had crashed into it. “JARVIS said that Tony landed in this area about 20 minutes after he left New York,” Steve frowned. “It took us an hour and a half to get here via quinjet.” Steve knew he’d been twitchy the whole flight, thinking of everything that could happen to a member of his team while he was too far away to help. “Maybe when things cool down I’ll see if he’s willing to help us upgrade.”

“Indeed, this quinjet is not fit for immediate response,” Thor agreed. “It looks like Anthony landed here, and look, there is a trail. His suit must have been damaged in some way.” They followed the path apparently made by Tony dragging his suit behind him. They followed it to a barn with a very strong-looking lock around the door handles. Steve looked around. He hated to break in, but the suit path definitely led into this barn. He was just about to break the lock when he heard a noise be him.

“Oh my god!” Steve and Thor whirled around, braced for attack, only to see a blond child holding some sort of homemade weapon that looked like it had been pointed at them until he’d figured out who they were. “Tony didn’t say you guys were coming!”

“You’ve seen Tony?” Steve asked. “Where is he?” Steve paused. “What’s your name?”

“Harley Keener. And he left. Come on into the barn. I’m rebooting the suit for him.” Steve and Thor exchanged a loaded glance, but followed Harley into the barn. They listened as Harley told them about the five shadows for six dead people, Tony talking to the mother of the soldier who died, the fight with people who light up from the inside out, and Tony stealing the fire-guy’s car. “Is he okay, guys? He seems to kinda freak out a lot. All I did was ask him about the portal and he couldn’t even breathe.”

Steve swallowed, feeling guilty that he hadn’t seen how much Tony was struggling, but it was Thor who answered. “Ah, he has seen many hard things. Iron Man is a hero, but sometimes that comes at a price. He is rightly haunted by the things he has lived. I have seen this in many a great warrior.” Harley nodded. 

Steve cleared his throat. “Harley, we have to go.” Steve pulled out his phone and called the tower. “Hey Bruce, we hit a dead end. Tony was here, but he left. We did get some new information though, something about people who light on fire from the inside out? Tony fought a couple.” 

“Yeah, that sounds like it could be Extremis. It’s designed to heal almost anything that could happen to the human body - all number of diseases, amputated limbs, birth defects, you name it. But I’m guessing it’s unstable. That could be what they want Tony’s help with. You have no idea where he went?”

“No, he hooked up with some kid, left the suit with him to reboot, and stole the car of one of the people who was on fire. Do you think JARVIS could find him?”

“Probably, given some time. I’ll put him on it when we hang up. Clint and Natasha checked in. They’re going through a list of properties listed under either Killian or AIM, but again, it’s going to take some time to eliminate all the extra places.”

“Damn. I’m not sure what else we can do here or how to find Tony. It’ll be dark soon, so I guess Thor and I will go back to the quinjet and get some sleep. No point in coming all the way back to New York if it ends up being around here. Hopefully Tony will get in touch soon. At least we know he’s alright. Or he was when he left here.”

* * *

The next morning, Steve received a message from JARVIS telling him that he believed that the Mandarin was at a base in Miami. Steve and Thor headed out immediately. When they arrived at the mansion, they were surprised to find Tony, walking in a banged-up Iron Man suit, and Rhodey, also banged up, but without a suit. Steve smiled, relieved that they were both alright. 

“Hey there Mr. Fahrenheit, you fellas look like you could use a lift.” 

The faceplate on the Iron Man suit lifted to reveal a smirking Tony Stark. “I understood that reference.” 

Rhodey looked back and forth between the two of them with an inscrutable expression, then cleared his throat. “Well, I’m glad you called the Captain when you called me. We’ll need backup for what’s coming.” 

Steve frowned at that. “You called Jim?” He didn’t think he’d managed to keep the hurt from his voice, at least not if the wince on Rhodey’s face was any indication.

“Well, yes, but only to get his password so I could read some files. It’s not like I told him where I was. Look, we can talk about that later. The point is, the guy on the TV is not the Mandarin. It’s actually – ”

“Aldrich Killian?” Steve cut in with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah, we know. Get on the quinjet. We’re not just here because you suddenly and without explanation fell off the grid. Tony,” he said seriously, wishing he was certain enough of Tony’s reaction to put his hand on Tony’s shoulder, “Maya Hansen was not a victim. She was there to help Killian kidnap Pepper. We think he’s trying to get you to help them fix Extremis.”

“He took Pepper? How long ago? What are you doing about it?” Tony lurched toward Steve, who caught him by the upper arms. 

“He took her before Nat and Clint could get there. They’ve been following her trail from there, and we were working with JARVIS to trace the Mandarin. That led us here, but I’m guessing since the two of you are here and I heard armor fly overhead, that Killian isn’t here. Do you have any idea where they’re going next?”

“Well, you just solved the mystery of what’s happening off the coast. That must be where they’ll have Pepper. We also have to deal with the President. He’s on Air Force One, which should be in the airspace just above us, with somebody else dressed in my War Machine armor,” Rhodey sounded very disgruntled. “The Vice President said that he’d talk to security, but baseline human agents aren’t going to be any match for a guy with Extremis inside my armor.” 

“You’re not wrong,” Steve responded, with a quick glance at Tony. “I think we should split up. Clint and Nat won’t be able to get here fast enough. Jim, will you go with Thor in the quinjet to save the President? I trust an Air Force colonel can handle a quinjet, even if he is more used to armor nowadays. Tony and I can go get Pepper and capture Killian.”

“How are we going to get there?” Tony asked.

“I called in a favor at SHIELD. They don’t have any assets in the area qualified to handle this, but they have the resources for when agents end up here. Jim, there’s a comm for you right over there. You’ll be in charge of updates – Thor tends to fry his comms. Let’s go.”

* * *

“Tony, do you have another suit somewhere?” Steve asked as they approached Killian’s location. 

“Steve, you’ve watched me build dozens of suits over the last six months. Lucky for you, they have a remote access feature, now that I’ve connected back to JARVIS. They’ll meet us there.”

When they arrived, they heard Killian yelling at a man in the War Machine armor, his whole body starting to glow. “What do you MEAN you lost him? The President dying in a very public execution is crucial to the plan.”

“I didn’t exactly anticipate fighting the god of thunder on an airplane. I made the extremely reasonable decision to escape with my life,” countered the man in the armor. 

Tony nudged Steve with his elbow where they stood behind a shipping container. “Look there she is. She’s glowing – they must’ve injected her with Extremis. We have to save her, Steve. It’s my fault she’s in this mess, and she’s my best friend.”

“We will, Tony, I promise. Good news is that it looks like Thor and Jim saved the President. Must be something else happening there, though, or they would’ve checked in already. Now, where are your suits? I was promised backup.”

Tony gestured with his chin. “Ask and ye shall receive, Cap. Let’s go. Steve was hard-pressed to follow the fight as Tony continually jumped off of things only for armor to surround him midair. Steve fought several of the Extremis agents, who were confounded by his unmeltable shield. Suddenly, he heard Pepper scream and turned to see her fall through a space where the metal of the structure had melted. She had landed on a platform above him where Tony was trying to reach out and grab her. Steve watched, as if it was happening in slow motion, as she started to fall. He could hear Tony talking to her as a buzzing in his head as he eyed the trajectory Pepper would take as he would figure the trajectory of his shield. He started to run at top speed, which for Steve was exceptionally fast, then leaped and flew across the gaping chasm, just in time to catch Pepper before she fell into the fire below. He heard Tony yelling, both above him and through his comm. He could feel Pepper burning his skin, but he didn’t put her down – he knew she’d just melt the metal they were standing on. 

“Pepper, I need you to try to calm down,” he said gently. “I know you’ve gone through more than anyone should ever have to today, but I’ve got you now, you’re going to be alright. Tony and I are going to take care of you, okay?” He watched as the panic began to recede from her eyes, as the glow began to recede from her skin. She cooled enough that he felt safe putting her down. They both looked up as they heard Killian talking to Tony. It was clear he’d seen Pepper fall, but hadn’t seen Steve catch her. Steve looked around to make sure there were no other agents. “You’re safe for now, but I’d like to go help Tony. Killian obviously has better control of this Extremis thing than the rest of his agents.” 

Pepper nodded and started to walk toward the steps to the upper platform. “I’m coming with you.” Her tone brooked no argument.

“Okay, but you stay behind me,” Steve ordered. As they approached, they watched Tony eject himself from one armor and dive into another. Steve jumped into the fray, letting Tony bounce his repulsors off of his shield, using the shield to knock Killian back, but seeing that his own weapons wouldn’t be enough to kill him. Even when Tony encased Killian in the Mark 42 and had JARVIS blow it, Killian just emerged from the fiery pit with his skin knitting itself back together. Steve had been thrown back by the blast and watched, horrified, as Killian stalked toward Tony. Then, out of nowhere, Pepper appeared and hit Killian with a wooden beam, then kicked a missile toward him and blew it up with a repulsor she’d taken from one of Tony’s broken suits. Both men just stared at her.

“Oh my god, that was really violent,” she said, seemingly back on the edge of panic. 

Tony hugged her and told her he’d take care of Extremis. “You’re going to be fine,” he promised. Then he turned to Steve, noticing the burns for the first time. “You saved her. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me for that. You said she’s your best friend. I have something of an issue with best friends falling to their death,” Steve exhaled sharply. “I’m just glad that I could get there in time.”

* * *

Tony was right. Pepper was fine. He managed to take care of it, fixing things, as usual, this time with the help of Dr. Helen Cho. Dr. Cho also removed the shrapnel from Tony’s chest, allowing him to live without the arc reactor. Steve watched alongside Pepper and Rhodey as Tony headed into surgery.

Over the next few months, Steve and Tony talked a lot about everything that happened, and Steve extracted Tony’s promise to always call him when things went sideways (“You have a team now, Tony. That’s what we’re here for.” “Yeah, yeah. Give it a rest, Rogers.”). They continued to spend time together, and Steve convinced Tony to spar with him in the gym in the tower. He still went to the SHIELD gym with Natasha, and he definitely learned more with her, but he much preferred the time spent with Tony.

During his time in the SHIELD gym with Natasha and occasionally Clint, Steve ran into SHIELD agents all the time. They all knew Natasha and Clint, and they at least knew _of_ him. He liked some of them better than others but made the same polite small talk with everyone. After Natasha had left for the day, he usually kept pretty much to himself. He'd put in his headphones and run or destroy some punching bags. He knew he'd be going on missions with many of these agents sooner or later, but he wanted to solidify his team first, and he wasn't even close. One February day, he was in the locker room putting his stuff back together and one of his least favorite agents approached him. They were alone in the locker room when he greeted Steve. "Hey Cap. How are things? Making progress with everything you've got going on?" 

Steve sighed internally but nodded back. "Rumlow." He couldn't figure this guy out. Before the Battle of New York, Brock Rumlow had mostly ignored him, which suited Steve just fine. According to Fury, Rumlow and the rest of the Strike team were among the best SHIELD had to offer, but something about Rumlow just rubbed him the wrong way. "Things are great." He wasn't sure what to say – he and Rumlow had never been alone together. Luckily, he didn't have to do anything. Rumlow finished getting his things together and headed for the door. As he walked by, Steve heard him whisper two words.

"Hail Hydra." 

And then he was gone. 

Steve stood frozen for a moment before pulling out his phone, thanking his lucky stars that he'd let Tony work some SHIELD-proofing magic on it. He pulled up the Avengers group chat and sent a message. 

_ I think I know why people were omitted from my who-to-trust list. Meeting at the tower as soon as everyone can get there. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To anyone who has trouble keeping track, this chapter covers from a few weeks after The Avengers (May 2012) to a couple of months after Iron Man 3 (December 2012). 
> 
> Don't forget to put your Queen character theme song suggestions in the comments! <3


	6. Fight from the Inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team tries to figure out what to do about Hydra and brings in outside help.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! I hope you're doing well. It's been a crazy few weeks (my husband got his wisdom teeth out and my cat had an emergency vet trip), so this took a while. Sorry for the delay! I am still welcoming suggestions for Queen songs that you tie to a particular character. The last chapter (Don't Stop Me Now) was for Tony. If you have ideas for other characters, let me know in the comments! Thanks to all the people who have read and especially those who have commented :)

Steve walked into the tower only ten minutes later. He knew he was wearing what Clint called his Captain face. “JARVIS, can you please tell me whether the other Avengers are here yet?”

“Of course, Captain. Mr. Stark is in his lab. Dr. Banner and Thor have not yet returned from their outing. Mr. Barton and Miss Romanoff have not arrived yet.” 

“Will Tony let them into his lab? Or should I ask him to come up here?”

There was a pause, and Steve knew that JARVIS was asking Tony. “I have notified him of your arrival, Captain. He would prefer that the other Avengers not join him in the lab.” Steve felt a tiny burst of pride that Tony trusted him to be in his space, but he also wanted Tony to trust the rest of the team. He knew he’d have to just give it some time. 

A few minutes later, the elevator door opened and Tony stepped out. “How goes it?” 

“How far back does JARVIS store recordings of what’s happening in the tower? I’d like to review everything our future selves did when they were here. It has audio, right?” Steve said. 

“Yes to the audio. I’ve got a year of surveillance stored on-site and another ten years backed up off-site. I find it extremely useful in business deals, and it definitely came in handy after I became Iron Man. You wanna wait for the other musketeers or go ahead and get started?” 

“Let’s go ahead and set it up. I’m not sure exactly what I’m looking for.” 

Without Tony having to say anything, JARVIS immediately projected the recording. Steve and Tony settled onto the couch to watch. They saw future Tony fly in through the window to watch as their current (past? If Steve still got headaches, this would give him one) team threatened Loki. On-screen, future Tony scoffed, “Mr. Rogers, I almost forgot, that that suit did nothing for your ass.” As future Steve replied on-screen, current Steve turned to raise an eyebrow and smirk at Tony.

“Well. That’s not exactly how I would’ve chosen for you to hear that, but okay. Sure. Why not? Your suit is extremely unflattering. We’ll work on it.” 

“Yes, I’m very concerned about how my ass looks in my alien-fighting pants.” Steve turned back in time to hear Scott Lang say that as far as he was concerned, it was America’s ass. They watched as STRIKE team, including Rumlow, came out of the elevator to take the scepter and future Tony explained to Scott that the whole team was Hydra, although they hadn’t known that at the time. 

“I’m sorry, what?” Tony said, turning to Steve. “You don’t look surprised. Why aren’t you surprised? I feel like you’re taking this warrior-stoic thing too far. This is shocking. And terrible. There are Hydra members inside SHIELD. Be more surprised, please.”

“I’m not surprised. You know when I was surprised? Thirty minutes ago when Rumlow said ‘Hail Hydra’ to me in a locker room. This no longer makes the cut of things I find surprising. Now I’m just pissed.” Steve consciously relaxed his jaw. 

JARVIS paused the playback. “Sir, which section of the recording would you like displayed? You deploying the Iron Man suit and leaping out of the window, Scott Lang riding along with the tesseract, or Captain Rogers riding in the elevator with the scepter?” 

Steve smiled at JARVIS’s dry humor, which he was starting to get used to in a machine. “Stick with me for a bit, will you JARVIS? Thanks.”

Future Steve entered the elevator and told them he was taking point on the scepter. Rumlow and Sitwell, who were clearly in charge of the group, both declined until Steve leaned over to Sitwell and whispered, “Hail Hydra.” Shock and pleasure crossed the faces of Rumlow and Sitwell as they handed the scepter over. Steve, on the other hand, remained straight-faced until he left the elevator with the scepter, at which point he smiled. 

Current Steve tried to have JARVIS stop the playback, but Tony interrupted, “No you don’t. This is the Cap 1 v Cap 2 fight. I gotta see this.” Steve groaned, but didn’t argue. Just then, the rest of the team came in.

“I didn’t think you’d send out a distress call to watch a movie,” Clint commented, collapsing into an armchair. 

Natasha, wasn’t looking at them, but at the screen. “Future you is a much better fighter. You’re lucky he didn’t want to kill you. I believe now that we’re friends. There are some moves I don’t show just any trainee,” she smirked at him. 

The team was silent just long enough to hear future Steve say, “That _is _ America’s ass,” while looking at the prone form of current Steve. Four of them swiveled to stare at him while Tony laughed helplessly.

Steve shoved him gently. “Shut up. This is all your fault. Look, that,” he waved vaguely at the projection, “is not the point. The point is, I was right. SHIELD was omitted from my who-to-trust list on purpose. Because at least some of them are actually Hydra.” 

Clint’s jaw dropped open, Natasha’s eyes narrowed, and Thor just looked confused. Bruce was the one who actually asked, “I’m sorry, Hydra? I thought they were wiped out in World War 2.” His eyes flickered between Tony and Steve. “When Steve crashed the plane into the ocean and defeated the Red Skull.” 

“So this Hydra is a foe of Captain America?” Thor asked. 

“Hydra was – is, I guess – a terrorist organization run by the Johann Schmidt – AKA Red Skull – during World War 2,” Bruce explained. “He believed himself a god among men and wanted to use the tesseract to shape reality to his will. By which he meant, ‘kill a bunch of people,’ basically.” He turned back to Steve. “How can Hydra be here now?” 

“I have no idea how it’s possible. I did defeat Schmidt, and from my understanding, the rest of Hydra followed soon after. But Brock Rumlow, head of SHIELD’s STRIKE team, said, ‘Hail Hydra,’ to me in the locker room today. Long story short, our future selves,” he gestured between Tony and himself, “apparently knew that the whole STRIKE team and Agent Sitwell – plus, from how the conversation went, Secretary Alexander Pierce – were Hydra. They were in the elevator with the scepter, future me needed the scepter, and he convinced them to give it to him by hailing Hydra. So now, they all think that _ I _ am Hydra.” 

“That could be a huge advantage,” Tony said. “From what we saw, it seems pretty likely that our future selves found out about Hydra in a violent way. I’m inside all of SHIELD’s files, and there’s nothing there about Hydra, so I’m guessing we only found out when they decided to come out of the shadows. Us not only knowing beforehand, but having a built-in spy? This’ll be cake.” 

Steve was already shaking his head. “I’m a terrible liar. I don’t know how to be a spy.”

Tony cocked his head. “Come on, you’ve never kept a secret? Told half-truths to avoid giving it away? I know Captain America is all virtue, but I’m willing to bet young Steve Rogers had a few things he didn’t want anyone to know. Tap into that guy.” Clint’s eyes flicked back and forth between Tony, who looked all too knowing, and Steve, who had just the faintest blush. He hid a smirk behind his hand. “Besides, you now have access to the queen spy. I bet she’d be happy to teach you, right?” He finally broke eye-contact with Steve to look over to Natasha, but Steve was still thinking about what he’d said. Maybe he could do this.

“Sure. You’ll never be a master of stealth, but I can coach you enough that you can get some basic information from STRIKE. The real problem is to figure out your backstory. People know too much about you. You killing the Red Skull is common knowledge. How did you get involved in Hydra? Who recruited you? Why did they think recruiting you would have a big enough payout to risk exposure? It’s one thing to tell a lie one time, but after they take a step back, at least the higher-ups will be wondering how you ended up on their side. Rumlow will take it at face value, because he’s got a little man-crush on you, but Pierce is smart.”

Tony shrugged. “Sure. So what we need is an introduction to Hydra that Cap has met and they haven’t. Someone from before their time.” 

Steve caught on quickly. “You can’t mean Schmidt.”

“Why not? You were the only one there with him when he died. You told me you didn’t even kill him – the tesseract did it for you. So we just come up with a story in which he convinced you of the need of Hydra but died touching the tesseract because he wasn’t as strong as he thought, and you couldn’t do anything about it because, Hydra or not, you had people in New York that you didn’t want to see nuked. You wanted a more… orderly Hydra. Only taking out those who were a direct threat."

Natasha frowned thoughtfully. "That's… actually not a terrible idea, Stark. It's always best not to have anyone alive who can contradict your story. But if Schmidt recruited him, how did he figure out that Hydra still exists within SHIELD?"

"Maybe first we should figure out how Hydra came to exist within SHIELD," Clint suggested. He was visibly restless. 

“J, pull up the pictures from SHIELD’s founding. I know Howard had some in storage. Cap, take a look. Anyone look familiar?”

Steve stood up to approach the pictures and gulped. “All of them.” Peggy, Howard, General Phillips, the Commandos, they all stared back at him. Then his eyes came to rest on a less welcome face, then narrowed. “What the fuck is Arnim Zola doing in these pictures?” 

“Who?” asked Clint, clearly puzzled.

“German scientist. He worked for Red Skull. He was the head of Hydra’s science division.”

“Operation Paperclip,” Natasha said. “After World War 2, SHIELD and other government agencies would have recruited German scientists with… strategic value.”

“God, isn’t that just like dear old Dad. So desperate for science that he completely ignored all the possible consequences. He got in bed with Red Skull’s best friend, and for what? What could he possibly have had that was worth it?”

“The serum,” said Steve, with sudden realization.

“What do you mean the serum?” asked Clint. “Like your serum?”

“Pretty much. Look, maybe it’s crazy, but everyone wanted the serum. They took pints of my blood after Erskine was killed, trying to unlock the secrets of it. As far as I know, that didn’t really help them much. But what if Zola had information on Red Skull’s serum?”

“Why would you think he did?” asked Bruce. 

“How else could Bucky have survived the fall from the train? I find him on a table in Zola’s lab, and then suddenly, he survives a fall that should have – no doubt about it – killed him.” He closed his eyes for a moment to swallow back his grief. “If there had been any chance – any chance at all – that he could’ve survived that fall, I would’ve gone back for him. I left him there. And he got taken and turned into the Winter Soldier.” 

“None of that’s your fault, Steve,” said Natasha, sounding softer than he’d ever heard her. 

He shook his head. “The point is, a baseline human couldn’t’ve made it. Someone with the serum, though, they would’ve had a chance. The only place he coulda gotten it was Zola. And that’s also reason enough for SHIELD to want to work with him. Although I can’t believe Peggy would’ve been on board.” 

"She may not have been," said Natasha, "but she didn't found SHIELD by herself. She would've had to make compromises."

"Maybe she wouldn't have been involved, but a lot of people would've given almost anything for the chance at the serum, Steve." Bruce looked ashamed. Thor, sensing his discomfort, clapped him on the shoulder, but said nothing. 

"Okay, so back to the plan. Steve was recruited by Red Skull, then, while doing his research on SHIELD, discovered that Zola was inside SHIELD from the beginning. But how did he figure out which SHIELD agents were Hydra? If it was obvious, Fury would figure it out," said Clint. 

"How sure are you of Fury? He is the one who told me STRIKE team was the best of the best at SHIELD." countered Steve.

Clint and Natasha exchanged a look. “There are some people in SHIELD that I’m absolutely sure of,” said Clint slowly, “but it’s hard to be absolutely sure of Fury. I do trust him. I do, but he keeps so many secrets. But then, some of the people I’m sure of are – or were – his most trusted people.”

“That would be a masterful tactic, though,” Natasha argued. “Surrounding yourself with the enemy and making them trust you. Look, I want to trust Fury, too, but I think actually talking to him is too big a risk.”

“Okay, you two know SHIELD better than any of us, so I want you to make a list of the agents you trust without question. Don’t approach anyone. Tony, can you run a deeper analysis on the agents themselves? See who works with Rumlow and the STRIKE team, if there’s any sort of pattern?” 

Clint and Natasha both nodded. “J, start running pattern analysis on SHIELD agents, their missions, hobbies, smoothie places, favorite colors, etc. Let me know when something pops.” 

“Of course, sir. Master Thor, there is an incoming call from Miss Foster.”

“Excellent, JARVIS! If you will excuse me, I’ll speak with her privately.”

“Actually, sir, she wishes to speak with the Avengers together.” 

Thor frowned, but agreed. 

“Hello?”

“Dearest Jane! How are you?” 

"Um, hi everyone. I have some… interesting news. I've been doing a lot of work scanning for events like the wormhole." At that, Steve noticed as Tony tightened just the tiniest amount, but he said nothing as Jane continued. "I thought, maybe, anything that showed the same energy signatures might be Loki. Thor said he escaped with the tesseract, which is how the original portal formed, right? So anyway, I've been looking for him."

"Got yourself a brilliant lady, there, Goldilocks," said Tony, patting Thor on the shoulder. "I confess, that didn't occur to me. So, what do we want to do? Go bat cleanup on the whole invasion thing almost a year later?" 

"I believe that Loki was acting under the influence of the scepter." Now, it was Clint who tightened. Steve could see Thor register the discomfort, but he continued, "he was promised an army by someone, and gifted with the scepter at the same time. He is prone to mischief, but not on this scale. If it is agreeable, I would pursue him alone."

"Actually, that's not why I called. I came to a location where I detected a similar signature, but it wasn't Loki. It was a stable gravitational anomaly… but then things got weird. I apparently disappeared for five hours, but it seemed like only a few minutes, and when I got back, this cop tried to grab me and everything sort of… exploded." 

Thor looked alarmed and opened his mouth to speak, but Steve cut him off. "Go. Figure out what's going on. Do you need help? Someone can come with you."

"No. From what she says, I may have to return to Asgard, and I would not take you away from your duties here. If I go there, I will have help enough." 

"Alright, but you take a comm unit with you. I want the data on intergalactic coverage anyway," said Tony with a smirk. Steve was beginning to notice that Tony tried to distract from his own kindness with quips and mocking. 

Thor gave an indulgent smile. "Of course I will take it with me. They will be most entertained by your Midgardian technology." Clint barely controlled a snicker at the look on Tony's face. 

Bruce cleared his throat. "Jane, would it be alright if I looked over your data? I think it would be great if we could develop a way to track this kind of phenomenon. Especially if Loki is going to be on the other side of it."

Jane seemed to hesitate. "Are you with SHIELD? They're fond of stealing my work." 

Bruce laughed. "After everything I've learned, I could not be less of a fan of SHIELD. Your work is safe with me."

"Okay. I'll send you what we've got. Tony, do you think you could help me arrange transport of all my stuff? It would actually be great if you guys could keep an eye on it – and Darcy – while I'm dealing with… whatever this is."

"Sure, I'll send someone out to get it in the jet." Thor and Bruce left to get started. "Anyway, you've given out assignments to everyone else, teacher. What are you planning to do?"

Steve took a deep breath. "I thought maybe I'd go see Peggy. Do you know where she's living now?"

Tony frowned. "Spy 1 and 2, don't you have things to do?"

Natasha caught his eye and nodded. "Let's go, Clint. We have a lot of personnel to comb through."

After they left Steve turned to Tony. "Alright, out with it. What didn't you want to tell me in front of the rest of the class?" Steve gave a half-smile that Tony didn't return.

"Aunt Peggy is in a nursing home in DC. She has dementia. Sometimes her mind is all there and sometimes it's not. I want you to be prepared. She has good days and bad days. And… to be honest, I wouldn't be shocked if her room is under surveillance. She founded SHIELD. Even if they weren't interested in her secrets – which they are – she would probably be under protection." 

Steve felt a wave of grief for the Peggy he'd known. "Thanks, Tony. I don't want to talk to her in public, either, though. Any ideas?"

"Sure, book a hotel room. They'll have recording devices in the lobby, but law prohibits them in the room. Don't book in advance and use a fake name. You'll need a credit card on file for incidentals, but we can work you up one with whatever fake name you like."

Steve blinked. "Easy as that, huh? Well alright then. Let's set it up."

* * *

Steve took a deep breath and entered the room at the nursing home. He could see it was a top-quality kind of a place and wondered whether Tony had anything to do with that. His eyes tracked to the woman in the bed and his heart stilled for a moment before restarting just a little too fast. He cleared his suddenly dry throat. "Hey there, Peggy."

There was a small intake of breath, then very softly, "Steve? You came back." 

He smiled warmly at her, trying to see the girl he'd known under the white hair and wrinkled skin. "Bit of a surprise for me, too, if I'm being honest," he replied. 

She chuckled lightly and held out her hand. "I'm so glad you're here. We have so much to catch up on. It's been so long." 

It seemed that today was a good day. He was glad that this first meeting could be easier. Even though he'd been awake in the new century for nearly a year, seeing Peggy was hard. She was a tangible representation of exactly how much time had passed. He walked over and grabbed her hand. "Actually, Peg, I was hoping to execute a jailbreak. Wanna go on an adventure with me?"

She chuckled again. "Never let it be said that I'm too old for an adventure. Lead the way."

He signed her out at the desk pushed her in a wheelchair to a car out front paid for by Tony. When they got to the hotel, she raised one eyebrow at him. "So a secret adventure then, eh?"

He gave her a half-smile and a shrug in return. He'd already checked in using his fake ID and credit card, so he took her directly to the room. He made tea and sat across the table from her. 

"Your tea isn't any better now than it ever was, and you only made it when you wanted something. Out with it."

"You always did know me better than anyone but Bucky. Alright, yes, I need something. I'm working with SHIELD now and I have some… concerns. I know you helped found it, which is one of the things that's kept me there, but… maybe I should back up a little. I've been working with a team. They're amazing – you'd like them. Actually, you do like one of them. I work with Tony Stark."

"Ahh, they've decided to have Captain America try to wrangle Iron Man since they couldn't manage it?" 

He laughed. "Not exactly. There was a major incident, and they called both of us in, and, well, anyway, we're a team now. We're sort of working with SHIELD rather than for them. Do you remember Arnim Zola?"

"Steve, it may have been longer for me than for you, but I couldn't forget the man who cost you your best friend." She took his hand and squeezed it warmly. Then she frowned. "But you're probably referring to the fact they recruited him for SHIELD." She sighed. "Yes, I was upset about that, but there was no arguing with Howard when it came to the serum. What does he have to do with SHIELD now? He's dead."

He told her everything about his future self coming back, tricking SHIELD agents into thinking he was Hydra, the team wanting him to go undercover. " I don't know what I'm going to do. Okay, so say they buy that Red Skull turned me and that I magically figured out that Hydra was in SHIELD from one picture of Zola. How am I supposed to explain how I knew the STRIKE team was Hydra?"

She was clearly upset, but nobody attacked a problem like Peggy. "Oh Steve. You're a brilliant tactician in a fight, but as soon as someone mentions undercover you turn into a fool. The answer is as plain as the nose on your face. " He just stared at her. "You're enhanced, darling. All you have to do is explain that you overheard them from the next room. I'm surprised Tony didn't think of it. And didn't you say there were two spies on your team?" She clucked her tongue in disappointment. 

God but she was brilliant. "Well, to be fair, they probably don't know my senses are heightened. I also wanted to ask you if you still knew anyone at SHIELD that you're absolutely sure of."

"I can help you there, too. My great-niece is an agent. Sharon Carter. She's based here in DC. You'll have to look her up while you're visiting."

"Couldn't help but follow in your footsteps, huh?" He asked with a grin. Peggy had solved his two biggest problems in no time at all. "I missed you. My new team is great, but they're still settling in and getting used to each other. They're not quite a team yet."

"Don't worry, you'll get them there." She patted his hand. They talked for another hour when he could see her start to flag. 

"I'll take you back now. Thanks for everything. You're the best, Peggy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Timeline update for those having trouble keeping track of where we are! This chapter picks up right where the last chapter left off, so February/March-ish of 2013, or about the time of the second Thor movie (the timing of that movie isn't particularly clear, so I've elected to have it happen then).


	7. Friends will be Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Steve meets with Peggy, he and the rest of the team come up with some new plans - with appearances from new friends and old - to take on Hydra.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have basically no excuse, other than life happened. My cat got really sick, and then Christmas, and then my other cat got really sick, and work drama. Anyway, here we are! We get to see a few new characters, although not the ones that I initially thought I’d bring in. There will be a LITTLE bit of stuff from Agents of SHIELD, but I think this should be readable even without seeing it. Some of it what’s in here is semi-spoiler-y for stuff that happened in season 1 (details in endnotes). If you’re confused about any of the stuff here, let me know!

_ It's not easy love, but you've got friends you can trust _ _  
_ _ Friends will be friends _ _  
_ _ When you're in need of love they give you care and attention _ _  
_ _ Friends will be friends _ _  
_ _ When you're through with life and all hope is lost _ _  
_ _ Hold out your hand 'cause friends will be friends _ _  
_ _ Right till the end _ _  
  
_

_ -Friends will be Friends, Queen _

The day after meeting with Peggy, Steve went for a run. It was early, before dawn. He pulled out his phone and the fancy Bluetooth headphones Tony had talked him into and headed for the monuments. As he settled into the run, he called Tony. 

"We're not all like you, Cap. Some of us need our beauty sleep," Tony answered after only one ring.

"Well apparently that doesn't include you since you haven't gone to bed yet," Steve replied. 

"How do you know? Maybe I'm very responsible."

"JARVIS told me. I checked with him before I called. Also, how could you even keep a straight face when you said that?"

"We'll revisit you conspiring with my AI later. What did you want to talk about?" 

“Peggy had a good day yesterday, and I think she solved pretty much all of our problems. Typical Peggy. What do you know about me?”

“What, is this a pop quiz to see how much I was listening when you talked? I wasn’t taking notes.”

"Let me rephrase. How much do you know about how the serum affected me?"

"That's a pretty broad question, Cap. I know about the increased strength and speed, plus the accelerated healing. Did the serum give you the blue eyes capable of manipulating people, or were those available on the original model?"

“The blue was on the original model, but the vision wasn’t. My senses are… heightened. Smell, hearing, vision, taste, even touch to an extent. My hearing, for example, is good enough that I can hear people talking the next room over. Say when I’m at the SHIELD gym.” 

Steve could almost hear Tony connecting the dots, but he controlled his response well. “So what you’re telling me is that you needed Aunt Peggy to remind you that you’re enhanced,” he said flatly. 

Steve chuckled. “Pretty much. She gave me a hard time over that, too. So that solves that problem. The other thing she mentioned is that she has a great-niece at SHIELD – Sharon – who apparently doesn’t advertise that she’s related to the co-founder. I’m having dinner with her tonight at the hotel so I can fill her in.”

“Careful there, stud, or she’ll think you’re trying to get in her pants.”

Steve could feel himself blush. “I’ll be very clear that this is a… business discussion.” 

Tony snorted. “Yeah, good luck with that. Anyway, you want to hear about my day, or are you all about you?”

“Sorry, dear,” Steve said dryly. “How thoughtless of me. I would love to hear about your day. Was it as good as mine?”

“Eh, it was a mixed bag. According to JARVIS, our sample is too small to come with anything concrete through pattern analysis without more known variables in the equation, so we need more known quantities or more variables. Preferably both. Theoretically, I could use the records I got from SHIELD to create a kind of web. Who knows who, who was assigned to what projects, etc.”

“Do you think you can plug in whatever lists Clint and Natasha give you? Give you some more,” Steve took a moment to reach for a Tony-ish way to describe it, “data points for your web?” 

Steve could almost see the smirk he could hear in Tony’s voice. “Well listen to you. Yes, I can add whatever we get from Spy 1 and Spy 2. There will still probably be a lot of agents outside the web that we’re not sure of. We could theoretically come up with an algorithm to designate people as Hydra or SHIELD, but we’d probably have a pretty big margin of error. It’s safer to split people into Hydra, SHIELD, and unsure, then do some more digging on the unsure group.”

“Sure, Tony, whatever you think. I’ll see if I can get Sharon to put together a list, as well.”

“Whatever I think, he says. Like he’s all agreeable and malleable. Well I’m going to take you at your word and do it exactly how I want to. When are you coming back to New York?”

“I’m meeting with Sharon tonight. Unless she has something in particular that needs dealing with here, I’ll be back tomorrow. Most of the Hydra agents we know about are there, and I’d like to keep an eye on them. I’ll let you know what I find out from Sharon.”

“Sounds good, Cap. See you tomorrow.”

“And Tony?”

“Yes?”

“Get some sleep.”

* * *

Unlike Peggy, Sharon didn’t need him to pick her up. She knocked on his door promptly at 6 that evening. “You know, I don’t usually meet strange men in hotel rooms,” she said with a smile.

Steve smiled in return and stepped back to wave her into the room. “I appreciate you making an exception.”

“Well, Aunt Peggy has always been my favorite. My parents never understood me wanting to be an agent. Aunt Peggy bought me my first thigh holster.” 

Steve laughed. “That sounds like her. When we have more time, I’d love to hear all about what it was like growing up with her, but I’m afraid I don’t have all that much time for chatting tonight. I need your help, and I need you not to tell anyone, not even SHIELD.”

If Sharon was taken aback by his request or the abrupt manner in which he made it, her face didn’t show it. “And what kind of help would that be, Captain?” 

“You can call me Steve,” he said easily. He told her an abbreviated version of the course of events: his future self had come back and convinced Brock Rumlow and others that he was Hydra; now they thought current Steve was also Hydra; he and the Avengers were trying to figure out who was trustworthy and who wasn’t; their need for allies. While he talked, he watched her. After he’d told her just about everything, he said, “You know, you remind me of Peggy. She watched me just the same way when I told her all of this. No reaction, just taking it all in. I admire that steadiness. I have trouble with it, on occasion. But if you’ve got questions, now’s the time to ask’em. We’ll have to figure out ways to communicate without SHIELD being aware, but I’d like to avoid as much of that as possible. When you don’t know who the enemy is, it’s tough.” 

“Have you seen _ The Untouchables_?” 

Steve blinked at her. That was not what he was expecting. “Uh, no. Clint mentioned it, but I haven’t gotten there yet.”

“Move it to the top. It’s an excellent movie, for all there are no women. It’s based on the story of how Eliot Ness brought down Al Capone. Now, Capone had bought a lot of the guys on the force by the time Ness got there, so he didn’t know who to trust. He teamed up with this older beat-cop, Malone. You know what Malone told him? ‘If you're afraid of getting a rotten apple, don't go to the barrel. Get it off the tree.’ Don’t look for allies just within SHIELD. Find your own people. I’d stay away from SHIELD academy – you can’t be sure whether Hydra has infiltrated the teaching staff. See if any of your Avenger friends have allies who aren’t SHIELD.”

“That’s good advice. I don’t know exactly what we’ll come up with, but we’ll talk about it. Still, we’ll need allies within SHIELD, as well – people who know the players and how things work. I’d appreciate it if you could help us, come up with a list of people you trust without question, maybe people you’re suspicious of. Tony is coming up with some sort of algorithm and the more data points he has, the better he’ll feel about it. Barton and Romanoff are coming up with lists, too. We’ll see where you guys overlap.” 

“I’ll do what I can. Hydra is everything Aunt Peggy fought against. I won’t let it take over SHIELD if I can help it. It sounds like future-you gave us a leg up. We just have to use it.”

* * *

Steve dropped entered the tower kitchen to find the other Avengers (minus Thor) already there. Tony stopped his pacing, and Clint and Natasha looked up from where their legs were tangled together on the couch. Bruce, making himself some tea, was the only one who didn’t freeze immediately.

“Wow, okay. I guess we’re debriefing now, then,” he joked.

“Now that you’re here, yes,” Tony responded. “Okay, so as I told Cap on the phone, we need more data. A handful of known Hydra agents among the thousands across SHIELD isn’t enough. How’s your homework assignment coming, spies?”

“Honestly, not that great. Neither of us are recruiters for SHIELD, and we both tend to work mostly solo,” said Clint with a huff.

“We do have a few, though,” Natasha said. “Bobbi Morse, for one,” she smirked at Clint, who rolled his eyes. 

Steve looked back and forth between the two of them. “Clint, do you disagree?”

“Oh no, Bobbi is definitely not Hydra. She just also happens to be my ex-wife. We were married for the longest five minutes in history. We also agree Melinda May is safe. Which is good, because she’ll be a real asset. I’d also swear Hill is on our side, but I think we should wait to bring her in. Her first loyalty is to Fury, and until we’re sure of him, we can’t _ really _ be sure of her.”

“Agreed,” Natasha said. “We’ll give you our full list. We also have to make your algorithm a little smarter.” Tony looked affronted, but didn’t interrupt. “While we don’t recruit assets for SHIELD, it’s my job to assess people and figure out the best way to get them to do what I want. What you need to understand is that people don’t usually apply to work for SHIELD. They’re recruited and then subjected to a rigorous battery of psych evals. In order to get new Hydra agents within SHIELD, either people are targeted for recruitment_ because _they look like they’re probably sociopaths – CIA rejects, ex-cons, etc. – or they’re vulnerable when they're recruited and their handler is Hydra. Imagine you have nothing – no family, no friends, or not many, no real future, no one to turn to – and someone in a suit comes to you and says they’ll save you. They’ll give you a chance. How do you feel about that person?” Natasha’s eyes flicked around the room. 

Steve cleared his throat. “Well, for me, after my mother died and Bucky was about to be shipped overseas, that person was Erskine, and yeah, I’d say I felt indebted to him.”

“And when he was killed, what did you do?”

Steve blinked at her. “I went after his killer. I wouldn’t have killed him, but I would’ve brought him in to face justice.” 

“And despite all the hardships you faced, you knew real love, right? Your mother loved you? And Barnes? Now imagine you’re someone who hasn’t ever experienced happiness or kindness or love. And imagine you had longer with Erskine. He spent time with you, teaching you things, encouraging you, molding you. Could you have refused him anything?” 

Steve hesitated, not knowing how to answer, but Clint interrupted. “The thing is, you’re not the only one with that kind of… foundation. I was a disaster when I started at SHIELD – I literally ran away from my family to join the circus, where it turned out people were just as awful. I would’ve done just about anything my handler asked. But my handler was Coulson.” He swallowed hard. 

“And then that cycle came all the way around when he brought me in.” Natasha pulled him away from his grief with a nudge of her toes to his thigh. He smiled and wrapped his hand loosely around her ankle. 

"Okay, so we're looking for specific recruiter type connections, not just any kind. With the additional data from you two, plus the junior Carter, we should be able to get a start. Anyone recruited by Agent is probably good.” Tony’s voice softened at the mention of Coulson. 

Steve and Bruce exchanged a look. "Well I'm going to get back to looking over Jane's data. It's fascinating stuff." 

"Hey, Tony, I know you're really busy, but do you think you could help me with something?"

"Sure, Cap. Whatever you need."

Natasha smirked at Steve's request and Tony's answer, seeming to decide that Steve was better equipped to cheer Tony up. "We’ll send the list right over, Stark. See you later." With that, she pulled Clint up behind her and they headed out. 

"Talking to Sharon, I got to learn a lot about Peggy's life. The life she lived after, well, me. SHIELD gave me files that let me know all of the commandos are dead, but I was hoping to find their families, maybe learn a little about their lives."

"Oh that's easy. J, can you compile a list for Cap?"

"Of course, Sir. The majority of their descendants do not live locally. However, one of the grandsons of Private James Morita lives and works in New York. He is a high school principal in Queens. Sir, it may be of interest to you to know that one of the names, Antoine Triplett, matches that of an agent listed in SHIELD's records. He is the grandson of Private Gabriel Jones."

Steve blinked. "Are you telling me that Gabe's grandson is SHIELD?" He grinned over at Tony. "Maybe I should pay him a visit."

"Let me look into him, first, okay? We don't know how involved Jones was in his life. DNA doesn't necessarily determine who you are."

Steve conceded. "You're probably right. Maybe I'll visit the principal. See what I can learn about Jim. Thanks, Tony." Without thinking, he clapped Tony on the shoulder. Tony seemed surprised, but didn't move away from his touch.

"No problemo, Cap."

* * *

One week later, Tony texted Steve and asked him to come by the tower. When Steve arrived, JARVIS directed him down to Tony's lab. As usual, Tony was fiddling, but he stopped when Steve came in. 

"Okay, so I'm going to tell you some things I found, and I want your honest reaction."

"Why, I'm fine, Tony, thanks for asking. How are you doing?" Steve smiled wryly as Tony flapped his hands as if to wave off Steve's questions. 

"Nope, no time for pleasantries. You remember when I said that anyone recruited by Agent was probably good stuff?" Steve nodded. "Well I decided to start my search of SHIELD personnel with people recruited by Coulson."

"Sure, makes sense."

"Well the most recent person listed as recruited by Coulson is Skye – no last name, very 80s – a few months ago."

Steve started, mouth open. "There's got to be some mistake. Could someone else have done it and… put his name on the paperwork? That doesn't make sense either. What the hell?"

"Well, that reaction was pretty reassuring. How much do you know about SHIELD's structure?"

Steve was still trying to work out how this could be right. "Hmm? Oh not much. I've really only interacted with Fury, Phil, Nat, and Clint."

"See there are levels. Higher levels get more info. Fury is 10. Hill and Coulson are 9, you're 8. The superspies are both level 7. You don't get, like, memos on all the stuff you're cleared to know, but you can mostly access it. I hacked up high enough. Coulson surviving is level 7 data."

Steve realized what Tony was asking. "I had no idea. None. Even if I haven't proved that I'll tell you anything you want to know, you have to believe I wouldn't jeopardize our mission to get Hydra out of SHIELD. Coulson would be a huge asset." 

Tony stared at him with narrowed eyes, then sighed. "I believe you. But I'm not so sure about the superspies. How do you want to play this?"

"Do you know where he is?"

"Sure do. Fury gave him his own quinjet. I can track it and we can intercept their next landing."

"Think you and I can break into a quinjet without Nat and Clint's help?"

Tony grinned. “That a serious question, Cap? No problem at all.”

* * *

Phil Coulson trudged up the stairs to his office after what had been a frustrating day for him. He opened the door and walked in, struck by the immediate sense that something was off. He tensed, his hand going to the weapon at his hip. Laying on his desk was a complete set of Captain America training cards, mint condition, all signed. His desk chair spun around. 

“Hey there, Agent.” Tony gave him a wry grin. Phil relaxed a little, then felt someone come up behind him. He didn’t turn, but heard them close the door. 

“Figured it was about time to make good on my promise to sign your cards. Of course, yours were covered in blood, but Tony was nice enough to help me find some new ones.”

“Gentlemen, it’s good to see you both. Here. Together. Fury didn’t tell me he was reading you in.” 

“Yeah, there's a lot of things Fury doesn't tell you,” Tony answered cooly. Steve smirked, immediately flashing back to Tony telling him the same thing. “But this one he didn’t tell us. We were digging into an unrelated SHIELD issue and found you instead. You look pretty good for a dead guy. Not as good as Rogers, granted, but still. Pretty good. How you been?”

“Not bad, all things considered. Better now. I was pretty pissed about the cards. I would’ve picked Barton and Romanoff for a stealth B&E.”

Tony bristled, but Steve smiled and responded first. “Sure, me too. But that’s not what this is. Besides, we wanted to verify that you were, well, really not dead, before we got their hopes up. Your supposed death hit them pretty hard. Clint in particular.” Steve knew Clint had nightmares about the agents whose death had resulted from Loki taking over his brain, and he wasn’t inclined to soften it for Coulson. Tony may have been prepared to go in guns blazing, but Steve, in his more subtle way, was just as angry.

Phil nodded, acknowledging the hit that had been, but decided to go with a redirect instead of a reply. “If it’s not a stealth B&E, what is it?”

Tony, laughed, though it came out a little bit brittle. “You’re not the only one who swoons at Captain America, Agent. And you haven’t even seen him really turn it on. He does that aw-shucks smile at them and they fall all over themselves to do anything he asks. He even broke Romanoff. Your lovely scientist – what was her name? Jemma? – was oh so eager to be helpful when he asked.”

“Now Tony,” Steve protested, blushing, “don’t exaggerate. Besides, Fitz seemed like he would do just about anything _you _asked. He had all sorts of science-y ideas he wanted your thoughts on.”

“I’m sure he did,” Phil sighed. “Okay, so you’ve established that I’m alive and dazzled my science team. Is there anything else?”

“Sure is,” Tony said, “but we’re going to need to chat someplace more secure than this.” 

“More secure than my private office on a SHIELD quinjet?”

“Definitely. Can you get to New York? I know that the rest of the team would be happy to see you, and Stark Tower – ”

“I told you, Cap, it’s Avengers Tower now. Got a big A on it and everything.” 

The corner of Steve’s mouth quirked up, but he continued smoothly, “Avengers Tower is completely secure. This is not a SHIELD discussion. Avengers only. I’d like to consider you part of our team, Phil.” He held his hand out for Phil to shake.

Phil shook it, then smiled over at Tony. “You weren’t kidding about his persuasive skills. My team has a mission. I’ll drop them off and come to New York. I’ll be there tomorrow night.” 

* * *

The next day, the whole team gathered, except Thor, who was still off-world. Steve cleared his throat. "There's not a good way to say this, I don't think, and certainly not any way I can come up with, so I'm going to just say it, and then you can ask whatever questions you like. So as you all know, Tony has been digging into SHIELD's personnel records, following up on what Nat and Clint suggested about recruiting agents. He, uh, decided to start with anyone recruited by Coulson, and he discovered that Coulson's most recent recruit was after New York. After the chitauri. After he was supposedly killed. Tony brought this to me first, because he wasn't sure if it was possible. We went to check it out. Phil Coulson is alive." He paused when Clint dropped the glass he was holding. Natasha immediately put her hand on Clint's thigh, trying to comfort him, but she didn't look any steadier than him. Bruce sank wordlessly onto the chair. "The records were classified at level 7, which means that at least Nat, Clint, and I should have had access. Based on your reactions, I'm guessing you weren't briefed either. Someone decided we weren't need to know. I'm not any happier about that than I'd guess you are. I'm sorry we didn't tell you right away, but I know how much he meant to Nat and Clint, and I didn't want to get your hopes up if this was a mistake. We asked him to come out so we could brief him on the Hydra problem. He should be here in an hour or so."

Natasha was the first to speak. "You're sure it's him?"

"According to JARVIS, DNA matches, and he's got Agent Melinda May on his team. He said that would mean something to you, but I also remember she's one of the people you said you were sure wasn't Hydra," said Steve.

"She and Coulson have been tight for a long time. She was temporarily working a desk job after an op went bad, but she's one of the best field agents in SHIELD. She's also 100% loyal to Coulson. She would know the difference," said Natasha.

"I'd still like us to make our own judgments about it," said Clint. "Why didn't they tell us?"

"I don't know. All I can come up with is that Fury used this to motivate us, to make us a team. He must've known we wouldn't trust him if we found out he lied about this."

"Well he may be an ass, but he's not an idiot," Tony piped in. "My trust in him was shaky at best, and this certainly didn't help. We deserved to know." 

"Agreed. Maybe Coulson can fill in some blanks for us. He’ll be here soon.

* * *

They were all settled in on the various furniture when JARVIS informed them that Phil was requesting entrance.

Tony’s fidgeting increased. “Send him up, J.” While Tony fidgeted, Natasha grew more still. When the elevator finally dinged, Steve swore she wasn’t moving at all. Phil walked in slowly, but Steve wasn’t watching him; he was watching his team. Bruce was probably the calmest one – he wasn’t as close to Phil as the rest. Natasha still didn’t move, but Clint jumped up off the couch. He walked right up into Phil’s space, but couldn’t seem to speak. Steve watched as Natasha’s eyes raced all over Phil, cataloging any differences she could find. He decided to help clarify things before they got into the emotions of it all. “JARVIS, I know that you have more advanced capabilities here in the tower and can see beyond superficial differences. Is this the same Phil Coulson that has been here before?”

“Yes, Captain Rogers. The man who has entered is a match for Philip J. Coulson, Agent of SHIELD.”

“Thank you, JARVIS,” Steve said. Then he turned to Natasha and Clint. “I’d like to bring him in. He’s someone everyone trusts.”

“Trusted,” Clint corrected, voice tighter than Steve had ever heard it. “Past tense. I’m not sure if I’m ready to upgrade it to present.” He narrowed his eyes. “How _could _you? You knew. You _knew _what this would do to me. I hardly slept for months. Everyone else I killed, that was bad enough, but to know I was responsible for your death –” 

“You were _not _responsible,” Natasha interrupted harshly, finally moving to stand behind Clint and putting her hand on his shoulder. “You had no control over that. None. None of the deaths were your fault. You have nothing to feel guilty about.” She turned to Phil. “_You_, on the other hand. He’s right. You did know what this would do to him. You recruited him. You listened to him when he wanted to break orders and recruit me. You’ve been the person we trusted most for _years._ How could you not tell us you were still alive? It’s been almost a year.” 

Phil smiled sadly. “It wasn’t my call. Fury said that you weren’t to know, even though your clearance is high enough. I wanted to tell you. Really, I did.”

“Some things are worth breaking orders for,” Steve interrupted. “I think this was one of them. I’d like to be able to trust you with my team, but something like this can’t happen again. I’ll certainly be having some interesting discussions about it with Fury. Now, it could be that you know more about SHIELD than I do. On the other hand, maybe you don’t.” He put his hand on Clint’s other shoulder. “Tony and I talked about it, and like I said, I’d like to bring Phil in, but it’s your call, Clint.”

For the first time, Clint pulled his gaze away from Phil. “We already talked about this, Cap. Any call you want to make, I’ve got your back. You think we should bring him in, we’ll bring him in.”

Steve squeezed his shoulder gently, then moved back to sit on the couch next to Tony. “Have a seat, Phil. Just after the Battle of New York, I fought someone who looked like me. I thought he was Loki, but as it turned out, he was me from the future. He told me that Bucky – James –” 

“– Buchanan Barnes. I know who Bucky is, Captain.” 

“Alright then. Bucky is alive. He apparently got injected with some version of the super-soldier serum, survived the fall from the train, and was captured and subjected to some form of torture and mind control. He was turned into the Winter Soldier, an assassin who has been active for decades and who Natasha is familiar with. I’d like to find him, but believe it or not, it’s lower priority than what I’m about to tell you. You can’t share this with anyone on your team unless and until they’re cleared by us. Non-negotiable.”

“I recently discovered that I like operating on this team, specifically because I can skip the protocol and clearance levels. If I’m keeping secrets from them, I’d like to have a good reason.”

“I’ll give you one. And when I say your team is not cleared to know, I mean none of them, not just below, but no one above you, including Fury.” Steve added. “You know my history better than most, Phil. You know I’m not one for the hierarchy of command. With the Commandos, I kept no secrets from my team, and the Avengers work the same way. For good reason.” He exchanged a glance with Tony. “So you’ll understand that there if I’m asking you for silence, there’s a good reason.” He looked Phil in the eye and waited. 

“I know you wouldn’t ask without a good reason, but I like having my team in the know. We recently had an incident where some of the SHIELD hierarchy almost burned our team. They’ve bonded pretty intensely. Skye hacked SHIELD to get information on a classified op that Fitz and Ward were on. And you might think Simmons is malleable, but she didn’t have any trouble shooting Agent Sitwell when he almost interrupted.”

“She shot Sitwell? That might be a good sign. Long story short, Hydra is inside SHIELD. Future-me didn’t tell me that. He impersonated Hydra to steal Loki’s scepter from Rumlow and Sitwell, which we found out recently, when Rumlow said ‘Hail Hydra’ to me in the SHIELD locker room. We’re trying to separate loyal SHIELD agents from Hydra double agents.”

Phil looked like he was about to speak, then stopped himself. Natasha said, “What we have to remember is that these aren’t just people operating undercover. They’re sleeper agents. The most effective method is to form genuine bonds with the people you’re deceiving. Play cards, go for a beer, or, in our line of work, risk your own life to save theirs. I know you’ve probably gone through a lot with your team, Phil, but we can’t let our vision here be clouded by emotions. People you directly recruited are probably sound, but they may not be ready for the level of deception required here. As long as Cap agrees, Clint and I are both fine with you telling May, with the understanding that she’ll tell no one. But you should come to terms with the fact that at least one member of your team is probably Hydra.” 

“I know you’re right,” Phil agreed sadly, “but I have a hard time believing that of any of them. And are you telling me that you think Fury might be Hydra?”

“We’re telling you we can’t be sure he’s not,” answered Tony shortly. “No one really knows him. He keeps too much to himself. Case in point.” He gestured to Phil. 

“Fair enough. I think he’s clean, but I’ll wait until you read him in. What do you need from me?” 

“First, I’m fine for you to tell Agent May. If Clint and Natasha sign off, that’s good enough for me. We’ve asked Clint, Natasha, and Sharon Carter – Peggy’s niece – to put together lists of people they trust without question and people they suspect as Hydra. Tony’ll plug the information into whatever fancy model he comes up with and we’ll go from there. Natasha is also going to try to teach me to go undercover.” Steve made a face. “Thanks to future-me, they all think I’m Hydra, so I’m apparently a built-in spy. Right now we’re just at fact-finding, but if my lack of hailing is discovered, we could shift to fight mode pretty quickly. We’d like you to be ready.” 

“Consider it done. How should I contact you with anything I come up with?” 

Tony handed him a tablet of some kind. “You can put it in here. Not hackable remotely and mostly not hackable in person, although from what I read, that Skye of yours could probably do it with access to the tablet. Put it somewhere she won’t be tempted to try. I’ll be able to see anything you do on this tablet, so use a different one to look at porn.”

Bruce, who had remained quiet during the exchange, chuckled, then extended his hand. “I’m glad you’re alright. Thor will be glad too.” 

“Thanks. I hope I’ll see you all again soon. I have to get back to my team.” 

* * *

Steve went into Tony’s lab a couple of hours later with two bottles of water under his arm and two plates of food – Tony had missed dinner. “Hey, Tony. How’s it going?”

Tony took the wrench out of his mouth and wiped his hands on a rag before taking his plate and looking askance at the water. “Fine. Why wouldn’t it be fine?” Steve raised an eyebrow at him. “Okay, it’s not fine, but I don’t wanna talk about it. Talk about something else. I’ll update you on my search for Barnes instead. Or hey! I have an invasive personal question. I’ve been wondering something since I found out you were gay.” Steve choked a little on his water. This was not going where he’d expected. “Was Barnes… I mean were you and Barnes… I mean he seems so important to you.”

Oh. That was actually an easier question than he’d been anticipating. “Oh. No. Bucky was family. We were never like that. He liked men, I think, but he always liked women just fine too, and that was easier then. I think, for him, it would’ve been hard to fall in love with someone he was trying so hard to keep alive. He was always looking out for me, but in the way of a guy dragging his sort of annoying kid brother out of trouble. He would’ve given anything for me to stop picking fights I couldn’t win. I loved him, but I chafed at him taking care of me. I wanted to be his equal. I don’t think I could’ve fallen in love back then. I was too busy trying to fight everyone. Then, after the serum, there just wasn’t that much time. I mean I guess there were offers, but I always wondered if any of them really saw me. Maybe, after the serum, Bucky and I could’ve fallen into something, but then there was the war, and then he was dead. Or so I thought.”

“Yeah, that seems reasonable. I never fell in love with Rhodey. And despite my obvious allure, he never fell in love with me. Although that could be because he’s straight.” 

Steve chuckled. “Might be a factor.” Steve caught himself staring at Tony and realized he was thinking about his obvious allure. He cleared his throat. “Anyway, you said you’ve been searching for him?”

“Sure, facial recognition for one thing. I also got Romanoff to tell me about the Winter Soldier missions she’s familiar with so I could set up an algorithm to detect any similar incidents.” Steve winced. “Sorry, but we’ve got to assume that since they’ve still got him, they’re still using him. They don’t know that we know.”

Steve sat with his head bowed. “You’re right. He was just so good, you know? I was runnin’ around committing felonies trying to join the army, and he was just trying to go to a science expo with a pretty girl. He always took care of me, even after I pulled him out of hell. Smart, too. I looked up some stuff, and do you know how much math you have to do to be a good sniper? Without any of the fancy scopes you have now. He was always good with math.” Steve took a deep, shuddery breath, finally looking up to meet Tony’s eyes. “What must they have done to him to turn him into the Winter Soldier?” 

Tony didn’t have an answer. “We’ll find him, Steve.” 

“Thanks, Tony. I don’t know how I would get through this without your help.” 

Tony, as usual, seemed a little uncomfortable with a genuine compliment, but he managed to reign in his usual need to babble. Instead, he stood, clapped Steve on the shoulder, and went back to his work table. Steve cleared his throat again and searched for an easier topic of conversation. “So you think this Skye is pretty good with computers?”

To Steve’s relief, Tony laughed. “Yeah, she’s pretty good alright. She part of this group that calls themselves hacktivists. Hacker activists. She managed to get into SHIELD a couple of times. With no live connection. Someone that good, there’s not a lot you can’t get into when you have physical access. My read is that she’s pretty loyal to Coulson. According to the video feed I… borrowed, she calls him AC. Coulson’s got a great team – excellent science division, pretty killer field agents. It’ll be a bummer if they turn out to be Hydra.” 

“Yeah, that’ll definitely cut deep. Can you believe Jemma shot Sitwell?” Steve chuckled at the thought.

“Apparently it wasn’t a real gun. It was something she and Fitz invented. They call it a night-night gun. Boy, do they need better names. Anyway, it basically sedates whoever you shoot. Still, it makes me like her.” 

“Me too. Ugh. I’m going to have to start undercover lessons with Natasha.”

“Better you than me.” 

“You’d be better at it, I think, but hopefully she can make me not terrible. Say, you got to ask me an invasive personal question. Can I ask one in return?”

Tony hesitated. “I reserve the right not to answer.”

“That seems reasonable. Why did you offer to let Bruce and Thor move in but not the rest of us?” 

“Oh. Well. I guess I didn’t really figure you guys would want to come. You’ve already got your special SHIELD-sanctioned rooms. I’m sure they’re very… symmetrical.” 

Steve gave a half-smile. “Yes. Extremely symmetrical. I confess, I like my rooms a little better now that Nat and Clint helped me decorate it and it doesn’t resemble a sad retro hole, but still. Nothing there that I can’t move here. If I had to. You know.” 

“Well, it just so happens that I might have some rooms ready that would be appropriate for you and the spy twins. You know. If you wanted.” 

“Do you think you could help me figure out how to get movers?”

“They’ll be at your old place tomorrow at 10.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author’s endnote: Okay, so here’s what you need to know from Agents of SHIELD (this note covers both this chapter and future chapters, so don’t read it if you’re unfamiliar with AoS and don’t want to know). Most of my inspiration/use of them will be from the first couple of seasons, so that’s what I’ll discuss here. 
> 
> Phil is alive. Woo! He did die during the Battle of New York but was brought back to life by some crazy alien shit that Fury did (which he doesn't find out until later; he thinks he was dead for like 9 seconds). He now heads a team of people who make up the “Welcome Wagon” – they seek out new powered people, introduce them to SHIELD, help them adjust. His team is made up of Melinda May (played by Ming-Na Wen, she’s the most amazing bad-ass woman ever), Grant Ward, Jemma Simmons, Leopold Fitz, and Skye, at least in the beginning. May and Ward are the field agents, Simmons is the biochemist/biologist/other life sciences, Fitz is the engineer/weapons specialist, and Skye is a hacker that Phil recruited from outside SHIELD. May and Coulson have worked together for a long time and are really close. She was actually asked to watch Phil by Fury because all the other people who received the crazy alien treatment lost their minds, but she only did it because she and Phil are so close. Fitz and Simmons (collectively referred to as Fitz-Simmons) are extremely tight – they’ve been best friends since the academy, he’s in love with her, and eventually, they end up together. Skye adores Phil. When they meet, she doesn’t know who her parents are, she was bounced around the foster system and has no real family, and she definitely ends up seeing Phil as a father-figure. Ward is Hydra. He was initially recruited as a teenager (after suffering abuse from his parents and older brother for his whole childhood and then trying to kill his brother by lighting their house on fire) by John Garrett, who is also Hydra. Unlike a lot of Hydra members, Ward is not loyal to Hydra; he’s loyal to Garrett. It’s extremely traumatic for the whole team – he tries to kill Fitz and Simmons and ends up giving Fitz brain damage. He falls in love with Skye and tries to convince her to join him in Hydra. She tries to kill him. He continues to love her, and eventually, after Garrett dies during the war between SHIELD and Hydra, he ends up a prisoner of SHIELD; he agrees to give Skye information on Hydra to regain her trust. He doesn’t care about SHIELD or Hydra – just her. After the team loses Ward to Hydra, they gain Antoine “Trip” Triplett, grandson of Gabe Jones. When Trip was first introduced on the show, his commanding officer was John Garrett, but he wasn’t recruited by Garrett, and he’s not Hydra. Eventually, they get some new team members, including Bobbi Morse. In the show/MCU, her relationship to Clint is never mentioned, but they’re married in the comics (616), so I kept that. In AoS, she’s got another ex-husband, Lance Hunter, who also ends up joining the team. He’s a former mercenary but joins SHIELD after the other members of his team die on an op with SHIELD. They also gain Alphonso “Mac” Mackensie, an engineer who takes over/helps after Fitz is injured in the fight with Ward. Phew. I think that’s most of the background, but hopefully, the story stands on its own.


	8. Killer Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Natasha trains Steve for undercover work.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all! Thanks so much to everyone who leaves comments/kudos. It really helps me write when I get discouraged :) As you may have guessed from the title, this will be a Natasha-centric chapter. Let me know if you have suggestions for Queen songs for any of the other Avengers! I have a phrase or two in Russian. I do not speak Russian! I got the words from the internet. I hope they’re right. If you do speak Russian, feel free to correct me. I put the translations in <> right after the phrase. Personal preference – I hate not knowing what’s happening when I read fics, trying to scroll down and get the translation and being confused, so I put it right after. Hopefully that works for you! Anyway, I hope you enjoy! 
> 
> There are a couple of lines here from Winter Soldier, but keep in mind that this is actually about a year before the events of Winter Soldier take place (actually during the time period of Thor: the Dark World). 
> 
> Also, I hope everyone is staying home and staying safe during the pandemic! My day job is an epidemiologist, so public health is near and dear to me. Please please please stay home if you can (I know it's not possible for many). Take comfort in fandom during this difficult time. I hope you're all doing well. <3

_ She's a Killer Queen _ _  
_ _ Gunpowder, gelatine _ _  
_ _ Dynamite with a laser beam _ _  
_ _ Guaranteed to blow your mind _ _  
_ _ Anytime _

_ -Killer Queen, Queen _

“Most liars get caught because they’re inconsistent. If we’re going to send you undercover as Hydra, you’ve got to commit. Future you only had to say one line. You have to have a whole backstory, ideology, identity, plan, everything. We’ve got broad strokes, but if you don’t want to have to improvise, we’ll need the details. For the most part, we’ll want you to stick as close to the truth as possible. Your very handy eidetic memory will allow you to keep track of everything, but it’s easier to convince people you’re telling the truth if you actually are telling the truth. The key is strategically leaving out the right things. You don’t have to necessarily tell people the answer – let them do the math on their own and come to the conclusion you want them to.”

“Come on Nat, what possible truth could I tell about being Hydra?”

“Lots of things. You and Red Skull were alone on that plane. He told you about the promise of Hydra. You didn’t kill him, the tesseract did. You saw something incredible when it killed him. You weren’t sure about joining SHIELD when you first woke up, so you wanted to look into it more. As soon as you saw Zola in the photograph of the early SHIELD, you knew he must have brought Hydra with him. You have enhanced hearing that allows you to listen in on conversations in the next room. The future is overwhelming and you need order. The brass never used to listen to you, and you don’t think Fury is listening to you now. You want more control over your destiny. Hydra is all about control. Any of those statements false?”

Steve blinked at Natasha in amazement. “Okay, wow. No, those are all true. I never even thought about it.”

“Right. So I’ve seen you strategize in real-time. You analyzed everyone’s capabilities and made split-second decisions that allowed six people to fight an entire army of aliens, plus one demi-god with daddy issues. You have the capability to think on your feet. What you lack is confidence. We’re going to practice.”

Steve spent the next few weeks working with Natasha. She gave him scenarios to describe and they talked through how to tell the lie using pieces of truth. Eventually, he started to see it as a sort of strategizing. He practiced several of them with her, and then she set him loose on the rest of the team. “Start with Bruce. Training wheels. Then Tony, and wrap up with Clint.”

“Do they know this is happening?” 

“No, but these are low-stakes. You’re practicing baby lies. I’ll be listening via comm, and when I say you’ve convinced them, I’ll let you know and you can tell them the truth.”

Steve frowned. “I don’t like the idea of lying to them. Clint might be used to the spy training methods, but Tony is sensitive to liars and Bruce is sensitive to spying.” 

Natasha smiled. “See, you read people very well. We just have to tap into that for your lie training. I’ll tell them that at some point over the next few days, you’ll be trying to convince them of something and I’ll be listening. That way, you’ll feel better about it, and they’ll be extra suspicious. Win-win.” 

Over the next several days, he convinced Bruce that he’d never been kissed (“No one paid me any attention before the serum, especially when I was standing next to Bucky. After the serum, there were a lot more important things happening than kissing.”), Tony that he’d never dressed up for Halloween (“We were broke nearly all of the time. Why on earth would I waste money on a costume?”), and Clint that his birthday wasn’t really the fourth of July (“Come on, Clint, what better propaganda is there than a Captain America born on the Fourth?”). Once he got used to it, it was actually a little bit fun trading on the Captain America everyone thought they knew.

* * *

Steve thought he and Natasha were actually making headway as friends. She seemed to like teaching him to lie better than teaching him to fight. “You’re actually better than I thought you’d be,” she admitted after the lying exercises. “As long as you’re telling pieces of the truth, you’re doing well. I think if we come up with enough details for your background and cover, you can fool anyone you come up against.”

With Steve’s lying capabilities solidifying, they changed their priority to fleshing out his backstory. Red Skull had indeed convinced him of the need for Hydra, but he wanted a more ordered Hydra. Red Skull was greedy; you could rule without demanding it – Steve had found leadership natural since the serum, and people followed him willingly. He didn’t like how Fury had lied to him when he was defrosted. He wasn’t sure if Fury was Hydra or not, but he wasn’t about to dance to Fury’s tune without more information – he wanted to be the one pulling all the strings. Still, he recognized that he wasn’t as familiar with the current political landscape. He wanted to work with the true leaders of Hydra. Natasha told him that he should confide in Pierce that his senses were more enhanced than people thought. “Make him feel that you trust him with something you haven’t even mentioned to Fury.” 

A few weeks later, she asked him to get dinner with her. As they sat eating pasta, she decreed that they should skip the shop talk. He raised one eyebrow at her and she smiled in return. “So, tell me about Steve Rogers in the 21st century. You like your StarkPhone? What’s your favorite thing about it?” 

Steve smiled. “I do like my StarkPhone. I’ve always found that Stark tech is the best. Howard was an ass, but he was a brilliant ass. I also like how far things have come in terms of equality. I mean there’s still a long way to go, from what I understand, but there’s been a lot of progress. It’s nice that I wouldn’t have to have a big fight with the brass to lead an integrated unit. And women in the army! I’m sure Peggy loves that. She had a tougher time than she should’ve.” 

“You really loved her, huh?”

“She was the most amazing woman I’d ever met. An absolute force of nature with no fear. The first woman to see me.” 

“It’s been almost a year since you woke up, though. It would be natural to think about dating.” She laughed in delight at the look of absolute panic on his face. “Don’t worry, солнце _ <little sun> _. I don’t mean me. This isn’t a date. What about Kristen from statistics? If you asked her out, she’d probably say yes.” 

“That’s why I don’t ask.”

“Too scared or too shy?”

“Too busy. And she’s not really my type, Nat. Besides, we have no idea if she’s secretly Hydra.”

“Well, that’s a fair point. What about Sharon? We know she’s not Hydra.” He wrinkled his nose instinctively. “No, she’s related to Peggy. That’s a little creepy. But I know lots of women who aren’t SHIELD.” 

“Shouldn’t we be focused on Hydra, not finding me a date?” he said quietly, more than a little desperate now.

“I’m multitasking.”

He sighed. “I’ll think about dating.”

“Great! Then I’ll allow you to change the subject.”

* * *

“So Nat is trying to set me up on dates,” Steve told Clint over a beer and a baseball game a few days later. “With women. I know she said I passed intro lie training, but I doubt that’s enough to fool Black Widow. Do you think she knows I’m gay and is trying to get me to tell her?”

Clint laughed. “Nah, man. That’s just her way of bonding. As far as she knows, the great love of your life is Peggy Carter. That’s how all the stories go. The published ones, anyway. The conspiracy theory stories say that the great love of your life is Bucky Barnes.” He glanced at Steve out of the corner of his eye. “Anyway, it takes a lot to overcome that much prior information about a subject. Plus you’re used to hiding that you’re gay. I wouldn’t have picked it up. You never check anyone out.” 

“That’s true. I didn’t need an extra reason to get decked. Do you think I should tell her?”

“That’s a you decision. I mean it’s safe, obviously. She knows I’m bi. And she’s a vault. At least if you tell her, she’ll be trying to set you up with people you might actually be attracted to.”

“I’m not sure if that’s a pro or a con, honestly. I don’t really want to get set up with anyone. We’ve got a lot going on here.”

“That doesn’t mean you don’t deserve some happiness, Cap. I know you lost a lot, and moving on from that has to be a monumental task. But there are good things about you being here, now, not the least of which is the fact that you could actually make a real life with a man you love. Just think about it. 

* * *

“See, now that I know it was a lie, I want to know what you dressed up as for Halloween.” 

Steve laughed at Tony’s question. “I actually didn’t dress up as a kid. I was Superman at the children’s hospital last Halloween.”

Tony just blinked at him. “I don’t think that counts as a real lie, Rogers. That’s practically the truth. Also how did I not see pictures of this? I can’t believe that it wasn’t all over the news. Oh, Halloween. That’s when I was working on the thing for the update. Yeah, okay. Still. J, throw some pictures of Captain America as Superman up on the wall.” Immediately, photos covered the walls – Steve in glasses with the S peeking out of his button-up shirt, Steve posing with his hands on his hips and cape flared out behind him, Steve flexing with kids hanging off his arms.

Steve blushed and groaned. “Come on, Tony. It wasn’t my idea. I talked to the hospital administrator and she had the kids vote. They thought it was funny.”

“I bet the moms liked it too,” Tony said with a smirk and a side-eyed glance at Steve. 

* * *

Now that the whole team had moved into the tower, Steve felt a lot less alone. He was always running into someone. He still sketched a lot in Tony’s workshop, but he also sketched in common areas when Tony was at the office. As he’d both settled into the tower and done more sketching, he found himself able to lose himself in it and forget his surroundings. He knew all the occupants of the tower; none of them were a threat, so he was able to release some of the hypervigilance he’d held onto in his old apartment. While this was generally a good thing, it did come with the downside that now, Natasha could sneak up on him. 

“Wow, that’s really good,” she said one afternoon, appearing over his shoulder to look at his drawing of Tony in the Iron Man suit.

He jumped but managed to regain his composure pretty quickly. “Oh, thanks. Now that I actually live here, I’ve gotten better at drawing you guys.” No need to mention that there might’ve been a slightly higher proportion of drawings of Tony. 

“You draw all of us?” 

“Sure.” He flipped to the picture he had (luckily) been working on the day before. It showed the six of them on movie night: Nat and Clint intertwined on the loveseat, Bruce tucked into an armchair, Thor sprawled across one couch with a huge bowl of popcorn in his lap, Tony and Steve on the other couch looking at each other and laughing. 

“You’re not half bad, Rogers,” she said with a little grin. “You got any flaws? I’d like to be able to present a balanced case to potential dates.”

He sighed. “I can’t sing. Or dance. Or walk away from a fight. It has occasionally been pointed out to me that I’m stubborn. I get a little tunnel vision about things that are important to me. I expect that would sometimes include my work instead of whoever I was dating at the time. I tend to see things in black and white. You want me to keep going, or can you come up with some yourself?” 

“Eh, I’ll make some up. Now, what do you like in a woman?”

Steve sighed again and decided that since he usually couldn’t walk away from a fight, it was about time he started this one. “Being a man.”

Natasha blinked at him. “Well now I have a whole new pool of possibilities. I’ll come up with some good ones, I promise. Unless you’re not ready to be out yet?”

“No, I think I may actually be. Clint and Tony already know. Might as well add in Bruce, and Thor when he comes back. Do we have any idea where Hydra stands on gay rights? I might have to suck it up and stay in the closet if I’m going to pull off my undercover mission.”

“Damn, that’s probably true. Well, that just means I have time to come up with the perfect date.” Though her words were brisk, she rubbed one hand over his shoulders in comfort. 

* * *

The whole team met in the common room a couple of days later when Tony asked for them. He didn’t wait for them to get settled before he started talking. “So Fury called. He’d like to call in the consultant. And by that I mean me. He wants me to build him stuff.” 

“Did he say what?” Steve asked.

“Wait, consultant?” Bruce interrupted. “Like you’re a part-time Avenger they pay by the hour so they don’t have to give you benefits?”

Steve frowned, confused. “They do that? Pay people part-time so they don’t have to give them benefits? And that’s what SHIELD is doing to Tony?” 

Natasha, clearly sensing that Bruce was about to pull Steve up onto a soapbox in defense of both Tony and abused workers everywhere, attempted to get the discussion back on track. “SHIELD wanted Tony as an engineering consultant. He’s developed some things for us over the last few years.”

“Why do they have to call him a consultant if he’s an Avenger?” Steve asked, not letting it drop. “I mean yeah, it’s not like he needs to live in the shitty apartments, but still. It’s the principle. Don’t the unions put a stop to that sort of thing?”

“Well there’s not that many unions, to be honest. And I’m not an Avenger. Iron Man yes. Tony Stark no.” Tony didn’t glance at Natasha as he said it, but Steve rounded on her anyway. 

“_T__hat _was your assessment? I knew you went in undercover, but this? You blacklisted him, and then you and Fury said he can’t be an Avenger. Is he still not an Avenger? Did I get that right?” 

Natasha didn’t look surprised at his ire, but Tony did. “Look, it was a bad week for me, dying and all. I possibly made some, shall we say, less than ideal choices. Maybe, for that moment in time, she was right. Doesn’t have to be a big deal, Cap. We’re a team now, right?”

“Of course we are, Tony. But for this to work, we – _all of us – _need to be on the same side. We fight _for _each other. From here on out, this team comes first. And Bruce, at some later point in time, I’d appreciate it if you could fill me in on these companies who try to cheat honest workers out of benefits.” Clint snickered, but Steve ignored him. “Now, Tony, what did Fury want you to make?” 

“Arc reactor-powered helicarriers with continuous sub-orbital flight that sync to a network of targeting satellites.”

“I’ve been listening to you talk tech for over a year and I still have no idea what that means,” Clint complained. 

“Helicarriers that go up and never come down and can easily kill a whole lot of people really fast,” Tony replied.

“You said no, right?” Bruce asked, fidgeting nervously. “I mean it would’ve been bad enough having SHIELD with that kind of tech, but now that we know they’re Hydra?”

“He has to do it,” Natasha argued. “They can’t know that we know they’re Hydra. If he would’ve done it for SHIELD, he has to do it now.” 

“I’ll build in a backdoor, no big deal. Don’t worry, big guy.” Tony clapped Bruce on the shoulder. “There’s no way they could change _my _tech into something I can’t hack into. I would’ve done it even if it _was _just SHIELD. J and I will just be a little more thorough now that it’s secretly for Hydra.” 

Bruce and Natasha both started to argue with him, but Steve’s tactical mind was turning all this over rapidly and he wasn’t really listening. “What if, instead of an obstacle, this was an opportunity?” Everyone stopped and looked at him. “We know Fury is requesting this, and whether or not he’s Hydra, this has got to be something Hydra wants. It might’ve even come down from Pierce. Let’s say you refuse.” Tony’s mouth opened to interrupt, but Steve cut him off. “At first.” Tony closed his mouth. “You refuse at first, and I convince you to build it.” 

Tony considered him for a moment. “You know, that’s not a bad idea, actually.”

In contrast to Tony’s quiet agreement, Natasha looked delighted. “Well, well, well. You surprise me, солнце _ <little sun> _. It’s an excellent idea. Stark will refuse, Pierce will be frustrated, and you can use that as your entry. We’d better move up your chat with Rumlow. You need to practice with him before we unleash you on Pierce, and if they want this as badly as I suspect, he’ll want it solved quickly. You sure you can build that backdoor, Stark?”

“Wounded. I’m wounded. Did anyone else see that knife embed itself in my chest? I can’t believe you’d doubt me. Do I question your spy skills, Mata Hari? No. Leave the tech to me.” He shifted his gaze over to Steve. “Come by the lab later. I’ll let you… convince me.” With that, he swept off.

Steve blinked. That had sounded almost… flirty? No, that couldn’t be right. He was just kidding. Right? He shook his head and turned to Natasha, who was giving him an assessing look. “I’ll see if I can bump into Rumlow in the gym this week. See if he wants to meet for a beer.” He wrinkled his nose. 

* * *

Steve went down to Tony’s lab the next day with breakfast after learning from JARVIS that Tony hadn’t eaten since lunch the day before. He looked somehow both tired and wired. His hair was sticking up everywhere and he had bags under his eyes, but his movement never slowed. Tony didn’t seem surprised to see him, and instead of talking, just dragged him over to a stool. 

“Is there something I can do for you, Tony?” Steve asked with a wry grin, trying to push the breakfast plate at Tony.

“No, it’s what I can do for you.” He pulled out a watch. “This is a monitoring system that will not trip any alarms and is cleverly disguised as a designer watch. You wear it whenever you’re undercover. We’ll be able to hear anything you hear. It’s not a great angle for a camera, so that you’re going to have to wear in the form of a sticker. Pins are passé. You’ll have to reapply it to whatever you’re wearing. I’ll be monitoring you from here.” Tony waved at a screen where Steve could see the video feed from the cameras. 

Steve turned the tech over in his hands. “This is incredible. Is this why you’ve been down here all night?”

“I thought I had more time, but with your schedule moved up, I had to get it done. You shouldn’t be undercover with no way to call for backup.” 

“Thanks, Tony. It’s amazing.” Tony started to wave his hand, clearly dismissing all he had done. Steve wasn’t about to stand for that. He touched Tony’s wrist gently, stilling his hand. “Tony,” he said, softer than before. “Really. Thank you. You’re a good man.” 

Tony looked up at Steve, wide brown eyes curious and confused. Steve couldn’t look away; he felt his breath hitch as warmth flooded his whole body. He hadn’t realized how close they were. Then Tony cleared his throat and the spell was broken. Steve managed to pull himself together and stepped back as Tony started to babble. 

“So it should be both super soldier and old man proof, but let me know if you have any trouble figuring out how to put it on or anything.” Tony was a whirl of movement now, picking up and putting down various tools and projects. Steve decided that maybe both he and Tony could use a break from the intensity. 

* * *

Steve spent the next few days working out excessively in the SHIELD gym, hoping to catch Rumlow. If he was thinking about the last time he’d seen Tony, well, no one else had to know that. On day three, he got lucky. 

“Hey there, Cap. Gettin’ in a little workout?”

Steve continued hitting the heavy bag. “Little one, yeah. What about you? Got time for a beer after your workout?” He and Natasha had discussed this. Keep working out. Make it casual. Use the exertion to hide any tells there might be. Steve could see Rumlow smirk out of the corner of his eye. 

“Sure, Cap. I was gonna keep it light today anyway. Meet you in the locker room in an hour.”

Steve breathed an internal sigh of relief. He’d taken the first step. 

After they’d both cleaned up (and Steve had put on his watch and applied the camera to his shirt), Steve and Rumlow headed out to a dingy bar (“I know a place, Cap. You’ll love it.”). Steve was mildly surprised when Rumlow knocked and said, “Hail Hydra,” to get them in. Steve thanked his lucky stars for Tony. Everywhere he turned was being recorded – they would be able to identify a lot of Hydra agents this way. Steve noticed that more than one of them paled as they realized who was walking through. He grinned, attempting to infuse some of how menacing Natasha always seemed when she smiled. He couldn’t tell if it worked or if they were just afraid of Captain America. 

Someone Steve didn’t recognize came up to Rumlow and grabbed him by the elbow. Steve knew he wasn’t supposed to hear the whispered, “Are you crazy? What the fuck are you thinking bringing him here?” 

Rumlow just laughed and shoved the guy off. “My orders come from higher up than you, Kaminsky. Captain America is welcome here. He’s our oldest living member. Well, top five anyway.” Steve watched as Kaminsky’s eyes widened and filed that away to analyze later with the team. What living members of Hydra could be older than _him_? “Make yourself useful and get us a couple’a beers.” Kaminsky nervously darted off to do as he was told. Rumlow settled them at a table with the other members of the STRIKE team. “So Cap, we’re curious. How’d you end up as Hydra?”

“I was recruited by the original Hydra. I just happened to die before I could do anything about it. What about you?” 

“I was recruited by my original SO,” Rumlow said, “and I brought Rollins in later. Together, we turned most of STRIKE. The ones who weren’t a good fit were… reassigned.”

“Growth is good. Is that how we get most people?”

“Mostly, yeah, but some come in through the Hydra Prep Academy. Sitwell did. Mostly legacy kids whose parents were Hydra back in the day.” 

“Good way to keep things in the family. The world I grew up in was a mess. Way I see it, not that much has changed. Order isn’t a bad idea, Schmidt was just too loud about it. I don’t seem to have too much trouble getting people to do exactly what I want them to.” Steve used one thumb to pop the top off a beer that Kaminsky had placed in front of him and took a long drink, never breaking eye contact with Rumlow. 

“Yeah, I bet you don’t. Speaking of, what’d you do with the scepter?”

Steve chuckled, silently thanking Natasha for preparing him for this. “It’s with Stark, for the moment. I’m letting him and Banner do a little investigation for me. Besides, I figured taking it from you would get your leader’s attention. Feel free to tell Pierce I’m open to a chat.”

“You trust Stark?” Rollins asked.

“I don’t have to. Much more to the point, he trusts me. And he can’t resist a mystery. You guys have big plans for the scepter?”

“I don’t know, man, I just work here,” Rumlow said with a laugh. “All I know is that we were supposed to take it to Dr. List. I’m sure he’s got all kinds’a shit planned for it. Weapons and experiments.”

“Hmm. Well if he has big plans, maybe I can be convinced to obtain the scepter for him.”

“I’ve never been disappointed by the plans from up top. I’m sure there’s something that’ll pique your interest. Hey, cheers. To the future!” 

“Now that’s something I’ll drink to.” 

* * *

Several hours later, Steve breathed a sigh of relief as he rode up the elevator of the tower. “JARVIS, could you please tell the team I’m back? Ask if they’ll meet me in the common room?”

“Certainly, Captain.” There was a brief pause. “They are all located there already, presumably awaiting your return. Shall I take you there now?”

“Yes, please, JARVIS. Thanks.”

“You are most welcome, Captain.” 

Steve leaned against the wall of the elevator. When he arrived on the common floor, he allowed himself to follow his instincts and just face plant on the couch. 

“Rough day, Champ?” asked Tony. “J told us you activated your tech. We’ve been watching the feed. Want some popcorn?”

Steve turned his head enough that he could talk. “You were eating popcorn?”

“Well, Birdbrain and I were eating popcorn. Natasha was eating popcorn and silently judging your performance. Bruce was in his lab because he’s all mature.” 

“Well, Nat, what’s the verdict? How did I do? And can I please never do it again?”

Natasha laughed. “You’re not me, but you did okay. Mission accomplished, soldier. We learned a lot.”

“Yeah, we’ve ID’d everyone at the bar. We’re going to look into Rumlow’s SO, see who else they recruited, as well as that Hydra Prep school. And then we were trying to figure out what living Hydra members are older than you.” Tony leaned over to pat Steve’s shoulder as he spoke. 

“You guys caught that too, huh? I can’t figure it out. Zola is the only one that I recognized from the pictures, and he died decades ago.” 

“Steve,” Natasha said slowly. “I was thinking. We’ve been treating Hydra and Bucky as two separate issues. What if they’re not? What if Zola didn’t just have the serum, but an actual test subject? What if Hydra has control of the Winter Soldier?” 

Steve immediately pushed himself to a seated position. “He’s a year older than me,” he whispered. “Oh my God, they have Bucky!”

“Hold up, we don’t know that,” Clint interrupted.

“But we could find out,” Natasha returned. “Pierce would know. You have to push forward.” 

Steve found himself looking for Tony, who was watching him. “I’ll take care of the behind the scenes. We’ll find him.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hydra Preparatory Academy is a real thing! At least according to the Agents of SHIELD show. And Sitwell actually went there.


	9. Great King Rat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team learns more about who is Hydra - and who isn't. Steve makes a new friend and figures out some things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the actual lyrics for this song aren’t really representative of this chapter, but I love the idea of Pierce being the Great King Rat. Since we’re meeting a new garbage character in this chapter, we’re also going to meet a new awesome character! Thank you so much to everyone who has commented. I appreciate the love more than I can tell you <3 I hope everyone is staying safe inside during this difficult time and that you’re all doing okay.

“We’ve got a problem.” 

“Hello to you too, Tony,” Bruce smiled.

“Yeah, no time for pleasantries. I looked into the info Cap got from Rumlow. His original SO is someone named John Garrett. Garrett has recruited a lot of agents. Some are already dead, some had pretty stable upbringings with no other red flags, and I’ve tagged several that are still active and should be considered as likely Hydra. One of those is on Coulson’s team.” 

Clint shot up from where he was lounging on the couch and Natasha was immediately behind him. Bruce looked alarmed, but said nothing.

“Everyone sit back down. We need details before we can do anything about this. Tony, tell us what you know.”

“Sure thing, Cap. Grant Ward was recruited to SHIELD by Garrett. He excelled at the operations branch of SHIELD academy, proved himself on several missions, and was a specialist at SHIELD before he got put on Coulson’s team. That’s all in his personnel record. What isn’t in his record is that he broke out of military school, stole a car, drove home, and lit his house on fire with his older brother inside. Garrett broke him out of prison. In several of his early psych evaluations, he stated that all he really wanted was to be worthy of the faith Garrett had shown in him. He’s definitely Hydra.” 

“Grant Ward?” Natasha looked about as upset as she ever did. “He’s a talented agent. Also an ass.”

“Yeah, apparently Hill evaluated him for Coulson’s team. She gave him top marks for combat and the best espionage score since Romanoff.” He paused to raise an eyebrow at Natasha. “Apparently he doesn’t have great social skills though, because she drew… something spiky next to his personality profile.” 

“Okay, so he’s one of the best and he’s on Coulson’s team. Clint, I’d like you to pay Coulson a little visit. Tell him what we know. Tell him we’re sure. Ward is Hydra. He can tell May but no one else. He could’ve spent his time on Coulson’s team recruiting. I want you there in case something goes down when I visit Pierce. Tony, if you could keep going through people that Garrett has recruited, keep building your web, that would be great. Nat, I’d like you to head down to DC now, settle in at SHIELD, keep an eye on things.”

“Excuse me, Captain, if I may?”

No matter how many times Tony told him not to, Steve still looked up at the ceiling whenever he spoke to JARVIS. “Yes, JARVIS?”

“It may be of interest to you to know that the individual you previously inquired about, Agent Triplett, grandson of Private Gabriel Jones, is currently serving with Agent Garrett.” 

Steve’s eyes shot to Tony’s. “Shit. Where are they stationed?” 

“They are currently on a mission, Captain. It appears that Agent Triplett is planning to take a brief leave to visit his mother when it is completed. If you like, I can alert you when that occurs.” 

“I suppose that’s about all we can do,” Steve sighed. 

“Maybe you should call his mother,” Bruce suggested. “You can get a feel for the family, see how close she was to her father and how close this Agent Triplett was to his grandfather. Maybe pay a visit that coincidentally overlaps with his.” 

“Excellent idea, Brucie-bear!” Steve could feel his insides freeze at Tony’s nickname for Bruce, but Tony didn’t seem to notice, because he continued without pause. “J, get her number for Cap.” 

“I’ll give her a call and then we wait for Pierce. We have to know more before we make our move.”

* * *

A couple of weeks after his chat with Rumlow, Steve was drawing in Tony’s lab (and if he was drawing Tony again, well no one needed to know) when he got a text from Natasha. _ Fury wants you to come down to DC SHIELD. He seems frustrated by the fact that I won’t give him your number. _ A moment later, he got another text, this time from Clint. _ I think it’s making Tash’s little spy heart happy to know things Fury doesn’t. Let her keep your number a secret. _

Steve chuckled and Tony looked up from where he was working. He didn’t speak, but raised one eyebrow at Steve, who relayed the text messages. “Well, it’s nice that the spy twins are having fun. When will you leave for DC?” 

“I’ll probably head down tonight and put Fury out of his misery tomorrow morning. Rumlow mentioned that he and the rest of STRIKE were being relocated to DC, so hopefully they’ve had plenty of time to relay my interest in a meeting with Pierce.” He saw Tony frown. 

“Maybe Bruce or I should go with you.” 

This was a conversation the team had already had. “Don’t worry. I’ve got all the stealth gear you gave me, Natasha is already there, ostensibly on other SHIELD business, and I’ll let Sharon know that I’m in town for an undercover meeting with Pierce. Nothing is going to go wrong, and even if it does, I’ll have local backup until you guys can get there. Natasha said – and I agree – that one of you going with me would look suspicious. Pierce has to think I’m alone here.”

“Do you think they’ll ask you to recruit any of us?”

“I think it’ll depend on whether or not Fury is dirty. If he’s clean, they probably won’t want Natasha or Clint. I’m guessing they think Bruce and Thor are too anti-government for Hydra. You… I’m not sure. I think they’ll probably think that recruiting you would be too big a risk, given how publicly you’ve gone after terrorists.” He shot Tony a wry grin as he recalled Tony calling out a terrorist on live television.

Tony gave a little half-smile, but it didn’t hold. Tony seemed to hesitate. “Recruiting me wouldn’t be the smart move. At least not overtly. Look, we haven’t talked about my life before Iron Man – and this isn’t an invitation to start – but I’ve been thinking about what Romanoff said about Hydra recruiting vulnerable baby agents. It’s possible that I might’ve been what could appear to be vulnerable to the casual observer.” Steve was confused by the new avenue of conversation, but he just waited for him to continue. He knew he could outlast Tony. He wasn’t always patient, but sometimes stubborn substituted for patient pretty well. “Howard was, let’s just say not father of the year. I was a little kid who desperately wanted daddy to love him, and when Howard didn’t fill the void, Stane stepped in. Until he literally tried to kill me, I pretty much did whatever he asked me to. I designed lots of weapons because I bought into Stane’s lie that I was keeping US soldiers safe, but what they actually did was kill US soldiers. I was too busy drinking and fucking to pay that much attention. If Stane had been Hydra and hadn’t gotten tired of living in the shadows, he could’ve gotten a lot of mileage out of me.”

Steve didn’t miss how down on himself Tony seemed. “So you’re telling me that Hydra shouldn’t recruit you because if you know what’s going on, you want to do the right thing.”

Tony shot him an annoyed look. “I’m telling you that the smart money is manipulating me from the background. Letting me do the dirty work and take the fall if things get bad. It would be a lot harder now, because I’m a lot more paranoid and cynical post-Stane, but they probably don’t know that. You should tell them it’s a mistake to recruit me.” 

Steve could tell Tony was getting agitated, so instead of arguing, he just said “Okay, Tony. I trust your judgment. Tell me what you’re working on.”

Tony could obviously tell Steve was changing the subject, but he seemed amenable, because he answered. “I’m working on the Trojan Horse that’s going to go in the new SHIELD helicarriers. It’s a baby AI called the Stealth Nanobot to End A Killer. He’ll be mostly inactive on the helicarrier, because too much activity would open him up for detection. He’ll do some passive surveillance and can be activated remotely if we need him.” 

As he listened to Tony talk, Steve couldn’t help the grin that came over his face. “Tony,” he said very seriously. “Are you telling me that you’re creating a stealth AI that you have named SNEAK?” 

“Can you think of a better name?”

It’s perfect,” Steve said. 

* * *

Steve woke up the next morning with energy to burn, so he went for a run. He’d liked the Washington Monument when he was last in DC, so he decided to head back. The sun was just coming up when he saw another runner. 

“On your left,” he said as he approached, so as not to startle the man. He loved the freedom of running in his new body. Despite the years he’d lived in it, he could remember what it was like to struggle for nearly every breath, and it never seemed to get old. 

Steve continued to run around the monument, and shortly found himself approaching the same man. Again he said, "On your left." 

He heard the man mutter "Yeah, on my left, I got it." He chuckled at the man's frustration and, when he passed him again, let himself call out, "On your left," a third time. This time the man's frustration hit boiling point and he started to sprint instead of jogging. He was no match for Steve's speed, and fell back to his usual pace a few seconds later. 

Eventually, Steve spotted him recovering against a tree. "Need a medic?"

The man chuckled. "I need a new set of lungs. Dude. You just ran like 13 miles in 30 minutes."

"Yeah, well. I got a late start. What unit you with?"

"58th pararescue. Now I'm working down at the VA. Sam Wilson."

"Steve Rogers."

"Yeah, I kinda put that together." Sam eyed him up and down a little suspiciously, Steve thought.

"Well it was nice to meet you, Sam."

"It's your bed, right?"

"What?"

"Your bed is too soft. When I was over there, I was sleeping on the ground. Using rocks for pillows like a caveman. Then I come back, I'm home, lying in my bed and it's like…"

"Lying on a marshmallow. Like I'm gonna sink right through to the ground. Yeah. How long were you in?"

"Two tours. Some things you leave there, some things you bring home with you." He shrugged. "How's it going in the modern world?"

"Well, you know. I'm loving the lack of polio. And the food. The team has undertaken my food and movie education with gusto. We used to boil everything. Got myself a fancy new StarkPhone. A lot of things are better." He paused as he looked at Sam. "Some not better enough. Look this is probably weird, but do you wanna grab a beer with Natasha and me tonight? I don't have a lot of soldier friends. Well. Not a lot of friends period I guess. Natasha says I should make more."

Just then a sleek black car pulled up and the window rolled down. "Hey fellas. Either of you know where the Smithsonian is? I'm here to pick up a fossil."

"That Natasha?" Sam asked. Steve nodded. "I'd do what she said, too. Damn. Give me your phone. I'll put my number in. And hey, if you ever wanna come down to the VA, make me look cool in front of the girl at the front desk, I'd be up for that." He handed Steve his phone back, then winked and smiled at Natasha, who gave a feline smile back. 

* * *

Steve entered SHIELD, wearing all the stealth and recording gear that Tony had made for him, prepared to see Director Fury, but hoping that he’d have the opportunity to see Pierce first. Luck was with him. Pierce was standing outside the elevator as Steve got off. “Captain, I know you’re very busy, but might I have a word with you?”

“Of course, Mr. Secretary. I’d be delighted.” Steve let himself smile. 

“Excellent. My office is right this way.”

Steve followed him in, remembering everything Natasha had taught him about body language undercover. In the SHIELD halls, he maintained his usual posture, but when Pierce told him to take a seat, he let his body relax, slouching a little into the chair and crossing one leg up over the other knee. “I’ve been hoping to get to speak with you,” Steve said. 

“Yes, so I’ve heard. I must say, I never dreamed when we recovered you that you’d be on our side.” 

Steve tried to emulate Rumlow’s off-putting grin. “That’s the best part, Mr. Secretary. Captain America tends to get a lot of… leeway.”

“Yes, I’d imagine he does. So what exactly are you looking for?”

“I’d like to be involved in your illustrious organization. Learn a little more about your plans. Who your assets are. That sort of thing. I’ve gotta tell you, I’ve found that a lot about the future is… let’s say in need of reorganization.” Pierce didn’t have to know that Steve really meant the government who let people be homeless and go without healthcare or decent working conditions or basic human rights. He heard Natasha’s voice in his head. _ The truth is a matter of circumstance. It isn’t all things to all people all the time. _

“Well, Captain, you certainly seem like you’ll fit right in with us. The first thing I’d like you to do is recruit Tony Stark. He’d be a huge asset and we need him.” 

Boy did Tony call it. “With all due respect, sir, I think that would be a huge mistake.” He watched as Pierce’s brows shot to the top of his forehead. Even though the whole bit had been Tony’s idea, Steve felt nauseous being the one to lay it all out for Pierce. “I’m not sure how much you know about Stark’s past, but he has a deep-seated need to think he’s a hero, and he wouldn’t recognize that Hydra makes the cut. He’s all about doing whatever he wants, consequences be damned. Order isn’t exactly his style. But that doesn’t mean we can’t get what we need from him. Do you know what Obadiah Stane’s biggest mistake was? He tried to kill Stark. Before that, Stark did pretty much whatever Stane asked him to. He designed weapons and led the company to huge profits, because Stane convinced him he was helping American soldiers. Saving them. As soon as Stane decided that he wanted Stark out of the picture, Stane ended up dead. You can’t back Tony Stark into a corner. I heard that he got a request from Fury for some arc-reactor-powered helicarriers. He turned it down, mostly because he likes to annoy Fury. I’m going to take a wild guess that that was really for Hydra? Give me, say 24 hours to work on Stark. Convince him to build the helicarriers.”

“Very good, Captain. It’s good to see that your mind works the right way. If you’re right, bringing Stark in would be a risk, and it’s not time for the world to know about us yet. Get me the helicarriers and I’ll bring you in. Do you think any of your other little Avengers would be welcoming to our ideas?”

“That depends. Is Fury Hydra?” 

Pierce laughed. “No. I can see why you’d be uncertain, though. It’s so helpful to have him swooping about like an overgrown bat. Draws suspicion off of me and mine. Speaking of which, how did you find out I was Hydra? I like to think that I play my part well.”

“Your facade is secure, sir. What I’m about to share with you isn’t widely known. At least not among anyone alive. I certainly haven’t mentioned it to Fury. It’s not just my muscles and healing that are enhanced. My senses are too. I can hear people whispering two or three rooms away, depending on background noise. Some of your agents are chatty when they’re alone.” 

“Ah, of course. I can see why you wouldn’t want to share that with Fury. He’s hard enough to get information out of as it is. So why does the Avengers’ susceptibility depend on Fury?” 

“Barton and Romanoff are loyal to him. They won’t switch sides, even for me. If Fury were in, they would almost certainly follow. I told you about Stark already. Banner is even less likely. He has less than zero trust in government authority. He’s only willing to stay with Stark because he believes that Stark can and will protect him from the government. Thor is off-world and probably won’t care much for the politics of earth. I’m afraid I’ll be your only powered person for a while.”

“Actually, you’re not. As a show of good faith, I’m going to introduce you to the Asset. Not in person of course. Via video feed.” 

Steve watched in hidden horror as Pierce pulled up a video of a man strapped to a table with a guard in his mouth. “Meet the Asset. The Winter Soldier. He is the fist of Hydra. For decades he has shaped the world.”

Steve worked hard to steel himself before Pierce turned back around._ What would Tony say? He was a master of deflection. _ “Wow. Winter Soldier. Fist of Hydra. Sounds like I gotta get myself a new PR person. Captain America seems a little plain next to that.” He tried a wry grin and felt himself relax a little when Pierce laughed. 

Pierce glanced at his watch. “This has been lovely, Captain, but I’m afraid I have other engagements to attend to. I have time for a quick toast to our new partnership, but then I really must run.” When Pierce turned to pour drinks, Steve seized the opportunity to plant one of Tony’s bugs under the desk and slip Tony’s (what seemed like magical) transmitter into a slot in the computer under the desk. He was thankful for all the times Tony had drilled him on the move, because he was able to finish it despite the fact that he couldn’t hear much beyond the pounding in his ears. When Pierce turned back, Steve was standing and ready to accept the whiskey. “What shall we drink to, Captain?”

“To successful partnerships. Hail Hydra.”

“Hail Hydra.”

* * *

“Hello, Director. I hear you’re looking for me.”

“Captain. It’s about time. It would be nice if I could reach you directly.” 

“You can reach me at the Tower at any time. I’m sure JARVIS will be happy to put you through. You reached Stark that way, as I understand it.”

“And?”

“I’d like to talk to you about your treatment of Stark.”

“I don’t need your permission to talk to my contractors, Captain. I think you’ll find that I don’t need your permission for much of anything.”

“And I think you’ll find Stark is no longer your contractor. He’s an Avenger. The Avengers do not answer to you. They, by their own choice, answer to me. I know that Romanoff and Barton still run missions for you, but in order to effectively run my team, I need to know when they’re available and when they’re on missions. I need to know what you’re asking Stark to do for you that’s going to take away from the time he has to work on gear for the team, including his Iron Man upgrades, not to mention the company he’s busy running. And I’m only going to say this once. You don’t get to talk to Banner at all. Anything you need from him, you go through me. I know you’re used to being in charge, but you need to learn to delegate. Consider everything involving the Avengers delegated to me.” 

“Shall I take that to mean that you’re not going to help me convince Stark to build the new helicarriers?”

“I’ll think about it.” Before he left, Steve leaned forward and slapped both hands on the desk. “You should trust me, Fury.” When he pulled back, he’d left a tiny slip of paper with an address. He knew Natasha would text Fury a meeting time later. He made eye contact, then flicked them down to the paper without moving his head so much as a millimeter, just as he’d practiced dozens of times with Natasha until she assured him that no recording device would pick up any tells from him. Then he turned and walked out of the office, careful not to look back. 

* * *

He sagged into the passenger seat of the car where Natasha was waiting for him. “I texted Fury a meetup time from my burner phone along with a code so he knows it’s me. And I talked to Tony. He said you did well and not to feel guilty about what you said about him.” 

“I’m not – ” 

“Shut up, we both know that’s a lie. You had to say some things – things Tony told you to say, by the way – and now you feel guilty. Don’t be such a martyr, Rogers.” She gave a tiny half-smile as she paused. “He also said to tell you that he’s going to use the transmitter you planted to get everything they have on Bucky. We’ll get him back. He told me specifically to tell you that he promises. By the way, does your type include brunets? Asking for a friend.” Steve sputtered, but she ignored him. “Now text your new friend. Get his address and tell him we’ll swing by to pick him up. He has 20 minutes to get pretty.” 

* * *

Getting beer with Sam was about as far as it could be from getting beer with Rumlow. Sam talked about his former wingman, Riley, who had died in combat. It made Steve comfortable enough to talk about Bucky, or at least what it had been like watching him die. They talked and laughed for a couple of hours before Natasha disappeared to “take care of some things.” Steve didn’t know what those things were, but he figured he was probably better off not knowing. She left him the keys, saying she had her own ride. 

As soon as she left, Sam took a pull of his third beer and said “So. What’s the deal with Natasha?” 

“Deal? She’s an Avenger. And a friend. Mostly. I think. Why?”

Sam grinned. “Nothing going on there?”

Steve just stared at him. “Going on? Where?” His brain finally clicked through modern vernacular, more slowly than he thought it should, considering the beer didn’t affect him. “OH. No. There is no there, there. We’re not together.” He paused, filtering the evening through a new lens. “Why, you gonna make a move?” 

“Well if you’re not interested, I just might. I’ve always liked my women a little dangerous.” 

Steve laughed. “They don’t come much more dangerous than Nat. You could be good for her.” 

“You’re not going to threaten me as her friend? No shovel talk?” 

“Nah, Nat can handle herself. Besides, if anyone’s licensed to give talks on her behalf, it’s not me. It’s Clint. You might have a slight disadvantage, though, seeing as how we’ll all be back in New York this time tomorrow.” 

“Amazing as she is, I don’t think I’m prepared to move to New York for a girl I just met,” Sam laughed.

“Yeah, that’s fair enough. How about for a job?” 

Sam turned and looked behind him. “You can’t seriously be talking to me, right? What kind of job?” 

“So this is going to sound a little crazy, but that’s apparently the kind of people I hang out with now. Natasha looked into you today. She wanted to make sure you weren’t a plant to lure me into some kind of trap.” Sam opened his mouth, but Steve shook his head and interrupted. “I did not think you were a plant. It would have been a stupid trick anyway. You are the first non-SHIELD person I’ve actually asked to hang out with, so the odds that I’d just talk to a random guy I met running were slim. But then she went and got Tony involved – ”

“Tony Stark?”

“Yeah, Tony Stark, and he doesn’t exactly observe personal boundaries, so they looked into a bunch of your sealed military records, and I thought you said you were a pilot.” 

“Hey, man, I never said pilot. You assumed.” 

“You manned the EXO-7 Falcon. The Khalid Khandil mission.”

“Even so, why in the hell would you recruit me? Don’t you have a whole agency behind you?”

“Have you ever seen _ The Untouchables _?” 

“Sure, great movie.” 

“‘If you're afraid of getting a rotten apple, don't go to the barrel. Get it off the tree.’ I need people I can trust, Sam.” 

“And you trust me? Man, no wonder your friends had to go all superspy on me. You need a keeper. Say I agree to this. What happens then? I just quit my job, move to New York, sit around and wait for the world to explode?” 

“If you agree to this, you quit your job, move to New York, and we stop the next explosion. I can’t say any more about it here, but I want you to think about it carefully. You got out for a reason.”

“Dude. Captain America needs my help. There’s no better reason to get back in.”

* * *

Steve and Natasha were waiting at a hotel room the next morning when Fury knocked. 

“Considering the fact that you were both in my office yesterday, I’m a little confused as to what we’re doing here.” 

Natasha wasted no time. “SHIELD is compromised. We’ve known for a while now. We weren’t sure if we could trust you until yesterday.”

Fury’s face betrayed no emotion. “And what exactly happened yesterday that makes me suddenly trustworthy?” 

“Alexander Pierce, in addition to being the Secretary of the World Security Council, is also the highest-ranking member of Hydra. Based on a visit from Steve and Tony from the future, we got a heads up. Steve is now undercover as Hydra. Pierce confirmed that you are not Hydra. That puts you squarely on our side.”

“I’m going to ignore your talk of the future and assume you have actual proof for accusing a man who turned down a Nobel Peace Prize and ask why it took the word of someone who is apparently our enemy for you to trust me.”

“You keep too many secrets, Nick,” Steve said, speaking for the first time. “It makes it hard for anyone to trust you. Although, to be fair, Phil thought you were clean from the beginning.” He locked eyes with Fury, not blinking and waiting for him to crack. 

Fury sighed. “I’m sorry about how it had to be done. Bringing him back was… complicated. I didn’t know if it would work for a long time. Then once he was back…” 

“You didn’t want to backtrack on how you motivated us to be a team. Well, guess what. You got what you wanted. We’re a team now. So here’s how it’s going to go. Pierce thinks I’m Hydra. Natasha is going to stay here for a couple of weeks before she comes back to New York. She’ll fill you in on all the details of what we know and how we learned it, and she has the means to communicate with us privately. You’re going to work with her to identify agents you’re sure of.”

“The list is short, but Maria Hill is on it.”

“Yes, she’s on our list as well. You’re currently cleared to tell her and no one else.”

“Now wait just a minute, you can’t just come in here and – ” 

“I can just. Peggy built SHIELD and the rest of you mucked it up. You let Hydra grow inside it right under your nose and you didn’t even notice. Getting rid of Hydra is my job. Now, as I was saying, we need you to help develop a list of agents you’re sure of. We’ve got a few, some of whom we’ve read in. We’ve let Coulson know, he’s been cleared to tell Agent May. Grant Ward on his crew is Hydra. We’re sure. Clint is spending some time with his plane. Sharon Carter knows. Everyone agreed we can include Bobbi Morse. I’m going to be meeting up with an agent who happens to be the grandson of Gabe Jones. Depending on what we find, he could be a useful ally. Your whole STRIKE team – you know, the one you so desperately wanted me to work with – is Hydra. So is Sitwell and John Garrett. We’ll keep you posted on the list as we come up with it. We’re also working on recruiting some help from outside SHIELD. You may be the director, but, as Tony would tell you, I’m Captain fucking America. This is how we’re going to play it. And when people get identified as Hydra, they’re out. This isn’t going to be like your goddamned operation paperclip, where you get to keep people if you think they can be useful to you. They all go. Oh, and you can tell Pierce that I somehow managed to talk Tony into working on those helicarriers you need. You should know he’s not doing it as your contractor. He’s doing it as part of our op.”

“Well then, Captain. I guess you’re in charge.”

* * *

Steve felt a huge wave of relief wash over him when he stepped back into the tower. Since Nat was staying in DC for a couple of weeks and Sam had to clear up his life in DC before moving, he was coming back alone. He asked JARVIS to take him to the common floor. When he arrived, Tony was on the phone.

“Look, Honeybear, I know it’s hard to get leave, but I’ve got some stuff I need to talk to you about. Tell the stupid airforce I have armor upgrades.” Steve’s stomach had tightened at the pet name, but he relaxed a little when he figured out it was directed at Rhodey.

“Don’t you mean the chairforce?” 

Tony froze as soon as Steve spoke. Then he slowly turned to face him. “Jeez, don’t sneak up on me like that. I’ve got a heart condition, you know. Shut up Rhodey, I do not just use it as an excuse to make people feel bad. How long have you been standing there?”

“Not long. Long enough to hear what sounded like you trying to recruit Jim. It’s a great idea. Even if he can’t be here full-time, it’s never bad having someone high up in the military complex in the know.”

“I’ll call you back, Rhodey. Come visit. Like tomorrow.” Tony hung up the phone. “So how are you? Where’s your new friend? He seems solid, no previous ties to SHIELD or anyone we’ve ID’d as Hydra. Works at the VA supporting other vets, which I guess seems like a worthwhile endeavor, even if that much talking about emotions would give me hives. Natasha said she likes him, and I didn’t think she really liked anyone. Except maybe the Birdbrain. Oh maybe it’s a bird thing. She only likes people named after birds. We agreed that his codename should be Falcon. Did she tell you?” 

Tony was babbling. Steve wondered how much sleep he’d gotten, but knew he wouldn’t get a straight answer. “Well I hope Natasha really likes him. He’s gonna make a move, and I’d hate for her to kill my first non-Avenger friend.” Steve smiled, wondering if he could convince Tony to eat dinner with him. He was starving and also desperate for non-Hydra company. 

“He’s going to make a move on Natasha?” Tony seemed a lot more confused than the situation warranted. 

“Yeah. I mean she’s terrifying, but I guess she’s beautiful, if you’re into that kind of thing.” Steve smirked. 

“Yeah, no I get that. I mean I like my balls attached, but if that does it for you, whatever. But doesn’t it bother you?”

“Why would it bother me? I don’t have a problem with two of my friends dating. Say, you hungry? I could go for some Chinese food.”

“What? Sure, Chinese food is fine, J, order something. But why aren’t you upset? Didn’t you ask this guy out? I feel like I would be disappointed if I asked someone out only for them to hit on my friend.”

Steve choked slightly on the orange juice he was drinking. “Ask him out? Like on a date?”

“Natasha said you asked him out for a drink!”

“I asked him to grab a beer with Natasha and me!”

Tony’s mouth slammed closed and he took a deep breath in through his nose, as if trying to compose himself. “She neglected to mention that she’d gone for drinks with you.”

“Jesus, is that all it takes to ask someone out on a date? And oh my god, is that why Natasha left early? Was she trying to matchmake me with _Sam_? Okay, let’s just get this straightened out before the poor guy moves in. I am not interested in Sam. He seems like a really good guy and I like being able to talk to another soldier. He doesn’t even know I like men. And he definitely likes Natasha.” Steve frowned. “I’m going to matchmake her right back. Damnit. I don’t need her to find me someone.” He was grumbling now, he knew, but he couldn’t seem to help it. Inexplicably, the thing that bothered him the most was that Tony thought he wanted to date Sam. He looked up. “Seriously. Not wounded. Now. What do you want to watch with our Chinese food?”

Tony smiled wider than he had since Steve had been home. “Well I’m glad you won’t be pining away. Let’s watch something fun. _ The Birdcage_? 

Steve felt all his tension uncoil. Tony had a way of doing that for him. _ Oh, _ he thought suddenly, finally piecing together everything that had happened over the last few weeks. _ I’m in love with him. Shit. _


	10. Feelings, Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve works on coming to grips with his realization, and in the meantime, goes on another undercover mission and finds out things he never wanted to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To make up for my ever-so-cruel love realization cliffhanger from last chapter, I have a special treat for you! There will be a brief interlude in this chapter from Tony’s point of view. Also, I had a sort of realization that Pierce would know Bucky’s relationship with Steve, and that makes it unlikely that he’d just show off the Winter Soldier to Steve on a video feed, so we’re doing a handwave-y thing where Pierce doesn’t know who Bucky is. He just knows that he got this asset from the Russians. Instead, no one really knows what Bucky looks like. We’ll pretend that the Smithsonian exhibit doesn’t exist. Everyone’s image of Bucky just comes from the comics done about Captain America. Vague resemblance, but could sort of be any handsome brunet. Also, as the title implies, get ready for lots of feelings in this chapter!

_ Gotta get rid of this feeling, I'm feeling done _ _   
_ _ Yes, I've gotta get rid of this feeling that's under my tongue _ _   
_ _ I've been waiting so long, I've got to be all fingers and thumbs _

_ -Feelings, Feelings, Queen _

Two days later, Steve was in the kitchen on the common floor, still reeling from the realization that he was in love with Tony. Talk about out of his league. Literally the only thing he seemed to have on his side was that Tony did, in fact, like men. But then, according to Clint, he hadn’t been with a man, at least publicly, since he was a teenager. Tony seemed to tolerate him, mostly. At least he seemed to trust him. But he got none of the glowing nicknames of Tony’s obvious favorites. While they were gifted with names like Platypus and light of my life, he was pretty much relegated to Cap. 

He was trying to behave normally, but he wasn’t sure it was going all that well. Luckily, Tony was busy in the lab and didn’t seem to notice much of anything. Aside from a few quizzical brows, he seemed to take Steves odd behavior in stride. The worst part was that Steve didn’t have anyone he could talk to about it. Natasha and Sam were still in DC, Clint was with Phil, and Thor was still off-world. He considered Bruce, but decided that Bruce was more Tony’s friend than his. Hell, with the nicknames like Brucie-Bear, maybe they were even drifting toward something more romantic. Steve shook himself. He needed to get over himself. Tony was definitely his friend, but there had been no indication that he was interested in anything more. And besides, he had more important things to worry about right now. Hydra was in SHIELD and they had Bucky. Fury was clean, but who knew how many Hydra agents they were going to have to take down. As he talked himself down, he realized that he’d somehow managed to prep two plates for dinner from the leftovers Bruce had made last night, as well as coffee that he didn’t even drink. Steve sighed. Apparently his subconscious had decided he was going to visit Tony in the lab. 

Steve entered the lab a few moments later to eardrum-shattering music. He watched silently as Tony paused, sniffed the air, and turned around. “Coffee!” He shouted. “J turn down the music.” Tony made grabby hands at the mug and took a deep swallow, ignoring the plate of food entirely. He beamed up at Steve. “It’s perfect. Just how I always take it. Thanks. How did you know I wanted coffee?”

“Don’t you always?”

Tony chuckled. “Yeah, fair enough. Is some of that food for me, or are you just hungry enough to eat two plates? I mean you’re a super-soldier, with the metabolism that entails, so I guess it’s not outside the realm of possibility. Although you’re probably too nice to come here and rub it in my face that you’re eating two plates of food while I watch, slowly starving to death.” He looked up at Steve hopefully.

Steve laughed. “Yes, one of them is for you. You know, you wouldn’t always be starving to death when I got down here if you occasionally came up for air and ate other meals.” 

“Yes, but if you knew I was eating regularly, how would I entice you to my lab?” 

Steve looked Tony in the eye as he said, “I’m sure I’d find something to come down for.” He couldn’t maintain eye contact without blushing, so he looked over at Tony’s worktable. “Come eat and tell me what you’re working on.”

“I’m working on tracking the video feed back to Bucky. I would’ve had it done already, but apparently, stealth is of the essence, and that slows things down. Plus, Pierce is apparently smart enough not to keep all his Hydra files on the SHIELD servers. Here’s the thing though. When we find him, you can’t go in guns blazing and rescue fair maiden from the tower. If you do, your cover is blown, and all of Hydra turns on SHIELD, who is woefully unprepared.” Steve opened his mouth, but Tony cut him off, grabbing him by both arms. “I mean it, Romeo. I know he’s your long lost platonic soulmate and whatever, and god knows he’s been through hell, but if you do this, a lot of good people are going to die. Maybe even including him. I can’t believe it’s me saying this, but we have to have a plan.”

He knew he should be focusing on Tony’s words, but he was more focused on the hands gently rubbing his biceps. That, more than anything helped calm him. “I thought your plan was usually just ‘attack’,” Steve said with a wry grin and a shaky breath. Tony laughed. "So where do you think we should start?"

"I'm going to start with info. I figure the great Winter Soldier has to be in their most highly-guarded area, right? He's their favorite shiny toy? So I'm working on backtracing the video feed to where they keep their main computer storage. I want lists of agents, assets, weaponry, missions, you name it. Then my part ends and I let you strategists take over and figure out what the fuck we're going to do about it.”

“Seems like a sound plan. Did you get anything from your little magic thingamabob that I left on Pierce’s computer for you?”

Tony’s demeanor shifted immediately. “Okay first of all, science, not magic. Magic is stupid. Science is amazing. And yeah, he does apparently have his hard drive disconnected from the rest of SHIELD and he keeps what he would consider less sensitive information on there. Not like names of Hydra agents or anything.”

Steve waited for Tony to continue. When he didn’t, Steve prompted, “Okay, so what kind of less sensitive information then? Golfing buddies? A list of his favorite restaurants?”

“He’s got records on the Winter Soldier. Not missions or locations or anything like that. Just…” 

“Tony, come on.” Tony was looking at his shoes. For the first time, Steve noticed he wasn’t even fidgeting. He was still, as though waiting for a blow. “Oh. Records on what they did to him.” He sank heavily onto the closest chair, his legs no longer strong enough to support him. 

Tony rushed over. He couldn’t seem to figure out what to do with his hands, but finally settled on putting one hand on Steve’s shoulder. “You don’t have to read them. I’ll go through everything with Bruce so we can figure out how best to help him, but you do not need to put yourself through this. Do you hear me?”

Steve was already shaking his head. “I owe it to him. I left him to suffer that. The least I can do is actually read through what they did to him.”

“Hey, no, look at me.” Tony crouched in front of him. “This was not your fault. Did you know he’d gotten a knock-off version of the serum?”

“No, but –"

“Stick with no. If you had known, would you have gone back for him?”

“Of course, but –"

“Nope, that’s it, you’ve lost your talking privileges being stupid. When you thought there was even the slightest possibility of him being alive at Azzano, you went back for him. You knew he was almost certainly dead, but you let an idiot fly you into enemy territory with no weapons on the slimmest of chances. The only reason you didn’t go back for him was that you thought there was zero possibility of him surviving the fall. What happened to him isn’t your fault. What happened after that isn’t your fault. Listen, was Bucky a smart guy? A good judge of character? Would he blame you for this? Better question, if the situation were reversed, would you blame him? Of course not.”

Steve took a shaky breath. Would he blame Bucky? No, Tony was right. He covered Tony’s hand where it was still on his shoulder with one of his own. “Thanks, Tony. Really.”

“You’re still going to read it, aren’t you?”

“Yeah. But I’ll try to feel less responsible for it.”

Tony’s response was cut off by both Rhodey entering the lab and a ringing from the burner phone Pierce had given Steve so they could remain in contact. Both Steve and Tony jolted back, Steve leaning further against the chair and Tony leaping upright. Rhodey’s eyes darted between them. “You gonna get that, Steve?” 

“Shit, yeah.” He answered. “Rogers.” Although Tony and Rhodey couldn’t hear, he knew JARVIS was recording for the team to parse later. 

“Cap, it’s Rumlow. Secretary Pierce asked me to pass on his thanks for your quick work with Stark. Seems you were right about him. You asked him to jump and he asked how high.”

“Damn straight,” Steve said, falling into his undercover personality with effort. “Stark is an extremely effective tool if you know how to use him.” Rhodey’s eyebrows shot to his hairline and he stepped toward Steve. Tony just put a hand on his chest. Rhodey, seeming to understand the need for silence, just gestured at Steve. 

“Seems like it. I know you were just in DC, but I was wondering if you might want to come to New Jersey for a couple of days. I’ve got a piece of Hydra I’d like to show you.”

“That sounds great. I can be there tomorrow.”

“Sure thing, Cap. I’ll meet you at the airport.”

Steve hung up the phone and slumped back into the chair, head in hands. “Where are you going tomorrow?”

“Hold on, what the hell was that? We just gonna ignore that? I know you’re Captain America, but I got a War Machine suit, I could take you.” 

“I’m not a damsel in distress, Sourpatch. He’s undercover.” 

“That’s actually why Tony asked you to come, Jim.” With his head still in his hands, Steve missed the suspicious look that Rhodey shot Tony. “Hydra infiltrated SHIELD. We found out from a future version of me who came back in time to steal Loki’s scepter from STRIKE team, which he did by impersonating Hydra. So now they all think that I’m Hydra and I’m undercover. That was Brock Rumlow, calling on behalf of Secretary Pierce, who is apparently Hydra’s top guy. SHIELD asked Tony to design a new helicarrier a few days ago. Since we knew the request was likely coming from Hydra, we decided to have Tony refuse and let me convince him on Pierce’s behalf. Now, Rumlow has invited to New Jersey,” his nose wrinkled, “tomorrow to Hydra’s facilities there. What if Bucky is there, Tony? My best friend in the world, who they tortured so much that he’s forgotten everything about who he was. They turned him into one of the most deadly assassins of the last century.” He finally lifted his head from his hands and shot Tony an anguished look. “How am I going to look at Bucky, see what they’ve done to him, and then walk away and leave him there?”

Tony sat on the arm of Steve’s chair and put his arm around his shoulders. “First of all, he might not even be there. They’ve got to have dozens of facilities. If he’s not there, you’re going to plant the tech that tells us where to find him. And if he is there, you’re going to remember that we’ll be back for him. This is so much sooner than we thought Pierce would give you any access at all. You can get all the information we need tomorrow and we’ll be able to put together a plan. You can do this, Steve.” Steve let himself relax into Tony, his head actually resting against Tony’s thigh until he realized what he was doing. Then he abruptly cleared his throat and leaned away slightly, looking back up at Rhodey. 

Rhodey looked stunned. “That is a lot of information to get in 30 seconds. So you all asked me to come here,” he sent an annoyed look Tony’s way, “to help you with Hydra?” 

Steve was still internally panicking. He’d known he was in love with Tony for all of about two days and he was already slipping up around him. “Well I mean it was Tony’s idea. I walked in on the tail-end of his phone call with you the other day. I think it’s pretty brilliant. Can’t hurt to have people on our side who have pull with the top brass. Especially people we trust absolutely. Gotta say, we don’t have too many of those. I know I don’t know you that well, but if Tony trusts you, you’ve got my vote. We’re not asking you to become an official Avenger or anything. Unless you want to, of course. Tony thinks you’d be an asset to the team, and I trust his judgment. I think it’s just good to know we’ve got some back-up firepower in case things go badly. Anyway, I’ve got to go get ready for Jersey. Tony, let me know if you have any other tech you think I should bring. I’ve got the recording stuff, plus a couple of bugs and the magic transmitter things to put in any computer I can, but I’d be happy to take anything else you think is a good idea. They’ll probably check me for weapons, and I can’t exactly bring the shield, so anything you have that’s undetectable might be helpful. Anyway, enjoy your time with Jim!” With that, Steve darted for the exit without looking at either one of them. 

* * *

**BRIEF INTERLUDE FROM TONY’S POINT OF VIEW**

Rhodey and Tony watched as Steve scurried out of the lab. “Holy shit, Tones.” 

“Yeah, Hydra inside of SHIELD is pretty mind-blowing. I feel like I’d have more of a reaction, but I’ve known for a while.” When it looked like Rhodey was going to respond, Tony put his hand up to stop further speech. “J, where’s Cap?”

“The Captain has reached his room, sir.”

“Sorry, he’s enhanced. You have to be careful. Now that he’s out of range, say whatever you want.”

“Okay, let’s talk about the real reason you called me.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“Uh-huh. So you’re not in love with Steve Rogers.” 

“Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Well then you better let the poor boy down easy, because he has got it  _ bad _ for you.”

“You take that back.”

Rhodey adopted a breathy voice. “Tony’s so brilliant. Tony makes such amazing tech. Tony has such good judgment. I’m just going to rest my head on Tony while he comforts me.” He let out an exaggerated, fluttery sigh. Returning to his regular voice, Rhodey continued, “Come on, man. He might as well have little hearts circling over his head. And when you called me to get here immediately, you did not sound like you were talking about Hydra. You sounded like you did back at MIT when you met Ty Stone for the first time. Luckily, your taste has improved. Steve doesn’t seem the type to sell you out to the tabloids.” 

“Shut up. He does not sound like that. How do you even know if he likes men? He’s from the 40s,” Tony bluffed.

“Our generation didn’t invent gay people, Tony. I saw how he was looking at you. He didn’t look at you like a friend or like someone realizing he was attracted to a man for the first time. Besides, at least half the history books have him secretly in love with Barnes.”

“He wasn’t in love with Bucky,” Tony replied, before he could help himself. 

Rhodey grinned. “Decided it might be important to find that out, huh?”

“Rhodey, be serious. It’s not going to happen. He’s Captain Fucking America. Paragon of virtue. Even if I did have feelings for him, which I am in no way admitting, he and I have to co-lead a team of misfit toys against a semi-ancient Nazi-sect. It’s not exactly the right time for a romance.”

“I’m going to skip over your complete lack of self-worth for the moment and tell you there’s never a right time for romance. It’s always work. With the right person, the work is just worth it.” Tony hesitated, and Rhodey pushed his advantage. “You deserve to be happy, Tones. And even if I can’t make you believe that, don’t you at least think that Steve deserves to be happy?” 

Tony sighed. “I guess he does. I’m not convinced that I could actually make him happy, but we might as well see. Because I know you’ll sic Pepper on me otherwise, I’ll do the mature thing and talk to him when he gets back from Jersey.”

* * *

**BACK TO STEVE’S POINT OF VIEW**

As Steve dashed out of the room, he heard Rhodey say, “Holy shit, Tones.” Steve smiled slightly. Boy was that an understatement. Steve took a deep breath, regaining some of his equilibrium now that he wasn’t actually in the same room as Tony. He found the presence of mind to text Natasha, Sam, and Sharon. It would be easier for Tony to get to Jersey, but if things went wrong in Jersey, they could go wrong in DC, too. He also texted Clint to be on guard. He finished packing, wishing once again that he could have the shield with him. 

* * *

“Hey there, Cap. Smooth ride?” Steve felt all his nerves slide right to the edge upon hearing Rumlow’s voice. 

“Like butter. Tell me a little about where we’re going.”

“And spoil the surprise? Trust me, Cap, you’re gonna love it.” 

As they drove off in the black SUV, Steve ran through his plans in his head. His phone obviously had GPS, he was already wearing both the watch and the camera sticker Tony had designed on the t-shirt he was wearing under his leather jacket (already unzipped), the transmitter he was supposed to plug in was attached to it in one of Tony’s clever ideas. He needed to stop thinking about Tony. Damn it. 

Rumlow interrupted his thoughts. “So what’s it like living in the ivory tower?” He spoke with obvious disdain and Steve struggled to match it in his response. 

“Well the wifi is great, but that’s about where it ends. I could get enough of the Avengers pretty fast.”

Rumlow laughed. “And here I would’ve thought the main perk would be Stark’s booze. I bet his shit is top-shelf. Unless you’re getting up close and personal with Romanoff. Can’t say I’d mind doing a little undercover work with her.” 

Steve swallowed the bile in his throat and pictured exactly what Natasha would do to this asshole to make himself laugh. “I prefer not to have to check my dates for knives.” 

“Fair enough. Something to be said for sweet little things.” Steve managed to fill the next 20 minutes with chatter without blowing his cover, but he hated every second. He also looked out the window and realized that the surroundings were starting to look familiar. They were headed to Camp Lehigh. Steve let the recognition dawn on his face and saw Rumlow smirk out of the corner of his eye. “See something familiar?”

“Can’t say I expected a Hydra facility at Camp Lehigh, but I guess that makes it the perfect place.” Rumlow parked the car and they headed towards the munitions building. Steve looked around, memories of training here flashing through his mind. He could almost hear the drill sergeant yelling at him to pick up the pace. They went down into a bunker, where SHIELD symbols and pictures of Peggy, Howard, and Colonel Phillips decorated the wall. 

“This is where SHIELD started.” Rumlow slid aside a bookshelf and revealed an elevator. They went down. “And this,” he said when the doors opened, “is where Hydra started.” 

The room was a mix of old and new technology. “I’d like you to meet our oldest Hydra member, Cap. This computer is what is left of Arnim Zola. When he figured out he was gonna die, he put his whole brain into a computer. Pretty freaky, but I can’t deny he was a genius. He taught us that when you try to take people’s freedom, they’ll put up a fight.” 

It hit Steve all at once. “You have to trick them into giving it up willingly,” he finished, thinking of Fury’s pleas for the ability to stop crimes before they start and what people will give up for security. 

Rumlow grinned. “Exactly. So while SHIELD grew upstairs, Hydra grew down here. The world tends toward chaos. And when it didn’t, we helped it out a little.” He hit a button, and a video started to play, showcasing some of Hydra’s triumphs over the years. 

Assassinations, coups, terrors, all flashing across the screen, but one caught Steve’s eye.  _ Howard and Maria Stark Die in Car Accident _ . The next image on the screen was one of the Winter Soldier. Well, he guessed that would be what had driven Tony and him apart in the other timeline. He knew that his first instinct would have been to protect Bucky, even if it meant keeping such an important secret from Tony.

“The Winter Soldier did all that?” Steve asked, forcing his voice to remain steady, needing to hear the confirmation. 

“You better believe it. The fist of Hydra. He killed fucking JFK.” While Rumlow stared at the screen, Steve looked around for the newest-looking piece of tech. Most of it was older, presumably housing Zola, but there was a set-up for use by regular agents. Steve managed to plant Tony’s transmitter before clapping Rumlow on the back. 

“This place is unbelievable. How come there’s no one else here?” 

“Not many people get to come here, but I thought you’d get a kick out of the fact that you and Hydra got your start at the same place.” 

Steve got the distinct impression that Rumlow was trying to impress him. He recalled Natasha joking about Rumlow’s “little man-crush” on him. “Yeah, guess there’s something in the water here. We only make the best.” 

“Besides, you already know about the helicarriers. Zola is the one that developed the algorithm to decide who gets scratched off the list, millions at a time.” 

“Efficient,” Steve replied. 

Eventually, Steve made it through Rumlow’s terrible tour and they ended up at a bar. Steve struggled to maintain his undercover persona, but he knew he needed to get out soon or he’d crack. He finally made excuses about turning in and getting back to New York first thing, when Rumlow stopped him. “We’ve been working our way up, Cap, but Pierce doesn’t see us as serious. STRIKE team is the best wetworks team Hydra’s got. You’ve already got Pierce’s ear. I know that you’re going to shoot right to the top, and I’d like you to keep us in mind when you get there. It’s fine working with the Winter Soldier, but he’s basically a robot. If they put together a team under you, we’d like to be it.”

Steve held out his hand for Rumlow to shake. “Don’t you worry about a thing. I’m always going to pick the team I know. You’ve gotten me caught up with a lot, and I appreciate that. I always show my gratitude, and I respect loyalty. I’ll take care of everything.”

Rumlow smiled, showing genuine emotion for the first time that Steve had seen. “Thanks, Cap. We’ll call you if we need you. You do the same.”

* * *

Everything that Steve had learned was racing through his head as he made his way back to New York. He wished he’d given in to the temptation to ride his motorcycle down. A ride would clear his head. He wondered if Tony had been watching the recording or if he’d be hearing it for the first time when he got home. Jesus. How was Tony supposed to deal with this? How could he ask for Tony’s help with Bucky now? And he could clearly kiss any romantic relationship with Tony goodbye, as if he’d ever had a chance there. He’d be lucky if Tony could even look him in the eye. Damn it all. The closer he got to the tower, the more his stomach twisted into knots. Even if they hadn’t been recording, Steve knew he had to tell Tony the truth. That was what his future self had said. Trust Tony and earn his trust in return. This moment must be what he was talking about. 

By the time Steve entered the tower, he was wound tighter than a spring. He walked into the elevator and took a deep breath. “Excuse me, JARVIS? Could you please stop the elevator for a minute?” The elevator stopped immediately. “Do you know if Tony has seen the recorded footage from my time undercover today?” 

“He has not.” 

Steve thought he detected judgment in JARVIS’s tone, so he rushed to reassure him. “No, no, I’m going to tell him, I just wanted to know what I’m walking into. If he has no idea, I want to be able to break it to him gently.” He paused. “Do you have any advice?”

“Mr. Stark appreciates honesty. I would advise you to tell him quickly.” 

Steve didn’t think he was imagining the threat in JARVIS’s tone. “Can you take me to him now? Also, is Jim still in the building?”

The elevator began moving again as JARVIS replied. “Colonel Rhodes is in the penthouse with Mr. Stark.”

“Great. I think it might help to have Jim there. Tony’s going to need support through this, and he probably won’t want it from me. God, that’s depressing. Shit. Focus on Tony. Head in the game, Rogers.” 

“Indeed, Captain.” He felt like JARVIS was definitely judging him, but he didn’t have time to handle that as the elevator opened to the penthouse. 

“Hey, Steve, I was just on my way out,” Rhodey said as soon as Steve stepped off the elevator. 

“Actually, Jim, I was hoping you could stay for a minute.” Despite the fact that he was talking to Rhodey, he couldn’t take his eyes off of Tony, who looked uncharacteristically nervous. 

“Oh, uh –" 

“I was hoping I could talk to you,” Tony interrupted Rhodey.

“I have to talk to you, too, and I really think I should go first.” 

Rhodey looked back and forth between the two of them, rolled his eyes, and said “Fine, sure, I got nowhere better to be.”

“Could we sit? I think we should sit.” Tony raised an eyebrow at Steve, but gestured them all toward the couches. Steve sat next to Tony, while Rhodey sat on the armchair. “So I’ve got some really hard stuff to tell you, and I’m not sure of the best way to do it. I think it’s going to hurt you, and I’m sorrier about that than I can say, but I have to tell you. I think future me didn’t tell you, and that’s what he was trying to warn me about.”

Tony, apparently realizing this was a serious situation, put a hand on Steve’s knee and said, “So just tell me.”

Steve took a deep breath, then another. “I need you to know that if you need to take this out on me, it’s okay. I’m tough, I can take it. Rumlow took me to where Hydra got started, told me about some of Hydra’s history. They’ve been using the Winter Soldier – Bucky – to shape history. Not just the occasional mission, but whenever they wanted something big done. Coups, assassinations, whatever. Apparently, he killed JFK.” He heard Rhodey mutter, “Shit,” but knew he couldn’t stop talking. “But that’s not what I need to tell you. Your parents.” He swallowed. “They didn’t die in a car accident. It wasn’t an accident at all.” Tony was already shaking his head, and Rhodey had stood up, ready to comfort him, but Steve knew he’d need to say it all the way through. “Hydra ordered the Winter Soldier to kill them. He didn’t have a choice, Tony. He –"

Tony held up a hand, and Steve immediately stopped talking. “Shut up. Just shut up. Are you seriously sitting here and telling me that your best friend killed my parents?” 

Rhodey came up behind Tony and put a hand on his shoulder. “Take a breath, Tones. This is a lot to take in.” 

“Get out. Get out right now.” 

“Look, I know this is a lot, and I’m so sorry that it happened. I’m sorry for Bucky’s part in it. You have to know that he would never have hurt them if he’d had a choice, but I understand if you need some space from me. I’d planned to fly out and meet with Gabe’s daughter and her son tomorrow. I’ll head out early, give you some space. But if you need anything from me – I mean it, Tony, anything, even just to yell at me – you call me and I’ll come back. Anything you need, I’ll do it.” He rose and headed for the elevator, heart breaking as Tony held his chest and gasped for breath while Rhodey tried to calm him down. 

* * *

Natasha was waiting for him in his room. Typical. “I take it you saw the footage?” he asked her, closing the door behind him. 

“Yes.” In a rare gesture of affection, she brushed her hand over his shoulder. “JARVIS said you were in the penthouse. How’d he take it?” 

“He told me to get out. Rhodey is with him. I’m going to visit Gabe’s daughter. I’ll be available if he needs me. Or if you do. But he needs some space from me right now. He’s got a lot to process.” 

“Yeah, it’s tough when you find out that your parents, who you hated, but whose deaths you mostly came to terms with already, didn’t die in a car accident like you thought, but were actually killed by the presumed dead best friend – who you’re secretly a little jealous of – of the man you’re in love with.” She said all this with almost no inflection and only the raise of a single eyebrow. 

“Give me a break, Nat. First of all, he’s not in love with me. Even if he was before – which he wasn’t – he’s certainly not now. And why would he be jealous of Bucky?”

“You give me a break, Steve. He’s absolutely in love with you. And that’s why he’s jealous of Bucky. He’ll have a piece of you that Tony never can.”

He decided not to argue with her obvious assumption that he was in love with Tony. “Look, I think you’re wrong, but either way, it doesn’t matter now. What matters is that Tony’s hurt, and I still have to figure out how to get Bucky out, and I can’t ask him to help me with that. He shouldn’t have to help the man who killed his parents, even if Bucky didn’t have a choice.”

“If I may, Captain,” JARVIS interrupted, “I have begun processing the data available in Hydra’s servers. They keep meticulous records. I have a detailed list of known Hydra members and am currently in the process of decrypting the locations of all of Hydra’s assets.”

“Does Tony know you’re telling me this?”

“Mr. Stark has requested that I help you in any way I can.” 

Steve’s heart clenched painfully in his chest. “God, his generosity really is boundless, isn’t it?” He collapsed onto his bed, trying to think. 

“JARVIS, are any of the members of Coulson’s team on the list?” Natasha asked. 

“Only Grant Ward, Miss Romanoff. In addition, Agent Triplett is not on the list.” 

“Thanks, JARVIS,” Steve said, pulling himself together. “Okay, let’s bring Clint home. From what you’ve said, May and Coulson can handle Ward if he doesn’t have help.”

“They definitely can. You go see Triplett. He’s going to be returning to a job where he’s one on one with a Hydra member. He deserves to be warned. Clint and I will work on a plan to send the information out to the rest of SHIELD without alerting Hydra. We’ll loop in Sharon and Fury if we need help.” 

“Thanks, Nat. I owe you one.”

“I seem to remember you saying that’s not how a team works.”


	11. Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Steve figure out what to do next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much to everyone who has read and commented. I appreciate it more than I can say :) 
> 
> This chapter starts out in Tony's POV, then shifts back to Steve's for the duration. I hope you enjoy it! <3

_ Hey boy where do you get it from_

_Hey boy where did you go?_

_ I learned my passion in the good old fashioned school of loverboys _

_ -Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy, Queen _

**TONY’S POINT OF VIEW**

Tony was fiddling in his workshop when suddenly a bag of Doritos and a box of Pop-Tarts plopped down in front of his face, startling him out of his trance. He looked up to see Clint standing there. “What the hell is this?”

“Just because Steve isn’t here to mother-hen you, doesn’t mean you don’t need to eat. But I don’t cook, so you get Doritos and Pop-Tarts. Take your pick.” 

Tony tried not to crack a smile, automatically imagining Steve’s response to Doritos and Pop-Tarts as a meal. Then he remembered everything he’d learned from Steve three days ago and the urge to smile fell away. “Where’s the coffee, Legolas? I can smell it.” 

Clint laughed and pulled a mug out from behind his back. “Here you go.” He took a deep breath. “So I was wondering when you want me out of the tower.”

Tony’s eyes shot up to meet Clint’s. “What are you talking about? Why would you have to leave?”

“I figured you wouldn’t be comfortable having me here, what with all the SHIELD agents I killed.”

“I’m gonna need a couple more vowels, Vanna. I still have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“You’re understandably uncomfortable with brainwashed killers, and I definitely meet that criteria, so I assumed you’d want me out.”

“Fuck off, Clint. You know I don’t hold you responsible for what happened on the helicarrier. That was Loki’s fault.”

“And Bucky’s not responsible for your parents. That was Hydra’s fault.”

“Damn it, that’s not the same thing.” 

“You’re right. I got hit with a mystical glow stick and suddenly had no will of my own. I saw the files you pulled. Bucky got tortured for decades, got his mind wiped over and over again, and the notes say he still had to be told he was doing this for the greater good.”

“He killed my parents.” Tony could feel himself crumbling.

“I know he did,” Clint said, softer than before. “I also know a thing or two about crappy parents and wondering if things could’ve been different. You’ve taken a hard hit, here, man. I get that. I also get that it might seem easier to take it out on Steve and Bucky, but I don’t think it’ll help you, and it sure as hell won’t help Bucky, who is still the prisoner of the batshit people who made him do it. You want some catharsis? Take their fucking Fist of Hydra and shove it up their ass.” Clint paused, and Tony couldn’t help it. He burst out laughing. “Damn it, I didn’t mean it to come out like that,” Clint said, but he was laughing, too. “Look, I know that maybe you think things have to be different now, but they don’t. You can still take this, and move forward, and be a goddamn Avenger, and use all that hate to burn Hydra to the ground.”

“Not one to pull your punches, huh?”

“Tough love, man. Besides, you should consider yourself lucky. Me coming down here stopped Natasha from doing it.”

“Well thanks for the save, then.” Tony sighed. “I know that Bucky Barnes was a good guy. I know that he wouldn’t have killed them if given a choice. And I know that we still have to get him out. I read the files, too. But it’s not just that he killed my parents. Honestly, you’re right, they were crappy parents, and things would probably never have been different. It’s also something Cap said when he was telling me. He said he thought his future self didn’t tell the me in that timeline, and that’s what he was trying to warn us about. So does that mean that Steve wouldn’t have told me without the warning? Would he have kept something that big a secret? Would he have picked Bucky over us?”

“You mean would he have picked Bucky over _you. _ You know, Steve and I have actually talked a lot about alternate timeline him. He said that without the push, he wouldn’t have been able to reach out to any of us. He lost his whole world, man. Everything he ever knew, poof, gone. Then he wakes up, has no one and nothing, and gets shoved right back into a fight. He said that without the hope of Bucky being alive to light a fire in him, he would’ve gone right back to that depressing pit of an apartment that SHIELD set him up with. If you ask me, he would’ve stayed there until some other terrible thing happened, running missions for SHIELD, probably with fucking Rumlow and STRIKE team, becoming less and less Steve and more and more Captain America. Hell, considering the fact that alternate Steve’s ‘evidence’ was that he was gay, I doubt he ever came out to his team. Steve told us really soon. I don’t think it’s fair to compare what alternate Steve might or might not have done. This Steve, _ our _ Steve told you, and he did it while making sure that your best friend was there to support you, and then left his only home in this century to give you the space you need. And speaking of your best friend, what would you do if Rhodes had been the one compromised? Would you just hand his well-being over someone else? Steve was in a tough spot. Cut him some slack.”

Tony slumped. “I hate logic. This is why I wouldn’t take Pepper’s calls. Fine. Tell him he can come back.”

“Oh no. He won’t believe it unless he hears it from you. Suck it up, Buttercup. Text him. And get some sleep.”

Clint walked out, leaving Tony to ponder what he’d said. 

Tony continued to fiddle with his projects, then sighed and scrapped everything he’d done in the last hour. He wasn’t sure when it had happened, but he’d gotten used to Steve sitting in his workshop and sketching. He’d spent three days in his workshop, stewing in his own anger and misery. His parents had died more than 20 years ago. He’d come to terms with it. He had enough reason to hate his father without blaming him for the car accident. Maybe more of this than he wanted to admit was about Steve choosing Bucky over him. Damn Clint for being right. 

“J, how are you coming on the decryption I know you’re working on for Steve?” 

“I finished identifying the locations of all the known Hydra assets, Sir. Two days ago.” 

“You always did process faster than I did, buddy. Thanks. Send him a text from me. ‘Come home. We found Rapunzel’s hidden tower.’ It’s a good thing Clint made us watch Tangled last week. He’ll get that reference.” 

* * *

**BACK TO STEVE’S POINT OF VIEW**

Steve laughed his way through another story about Gabe. This trip had been a good idea. He’d taken his bike down to North Carolina, hoping the drive would do him some good. He’d spent the first two days of his visit talking about Gabe during the war and hearing stories of his life after. It had been healing in a way he hadn’t expected. Gabe had led a full and wonderful life and was survived by the love of his life, a wonderful daughter, and a grandson who was on the track to living up to his legacy. Now, though, it was time to tell Trip (he’d been informed that only grandma got to call him Antoine) the other reason for his visit. “Ma’am, I appreciate your hospitality more than I can say, and I can’t tell you how much I’ve enjoyed talking to you, but would it be possible for me to speak with your son alone?” 

“Gonna talk shop, hm? You go right ahead, honey. I’ll go make dinner. You boys can talk out back. Captain? I’m really glad you came. You brought my daddy back with you.” With that, she kissed his cheek and walked into the kitchen.

Trip led the way out to the back porch. “Gotta say, I’m a little nervous about what kind of shop Captain America wants to talk with me. Is this the real reason you came?”

“No. Maybe the reason I came now. Believe it or not, I was a little nervous to visit. I wasn’t sure how it would really feel to see the lives that my friends lived while I was in the ice. Seeing Peggy how she is now is tough. A very in-your-face reminder of exactly what I missed. But I came because I wanted to know. This just moved up my timeline. It couldn’t wait. You should probably sit.” Steve cleared his throat. “How much do you know about Hydra?” 

Trip looked surprised. “You mean besides the fact that it was the Nazi science division that captured my grandfather and that he spent his time in the war trying to dismantle? Plenty, actually. Why?”

“Because they didn’t cease to exist when the Red Skull did. Zola brought them over when SHIELD recruited him. He worked for SHIELD because they thought he could help them with the serum. Instead, he rebuilt Hydra within SHIELD. There are thousands of SHIELD agents. Hundreds of them are actually Hydra. Including John Garrett.” 

Dozens of emotions passed over Trip’s face, too quickly for Steve to decipher. “Garrett? Are you sure?” 

There was pain there. “Yes. I’m sorry, but we’re sure. He’s Hydra, and he’s recruited several members.”

“But how can you be sure?”

“Believe it or not, I’m undercover. And they keep membership records.” 

“I’m sorry, Captain America is undercover as Hydra? And they believed that?” 

Steve shrugged. “So far.” 

“Son of a bitch. God damn Garrett. I trusted him. Fuck.” He took a deep breath and Steve could see as he changed from Trip to Agent Triplett. “Okay, so why are you telling me? Are you going door-to-door to every real SHIELD agent’s mother’s house? Like a tall Girl Scout selling horrifying news?”

Steve laughed. “No. We’re working on how to figure out how to send the information out without tipping off Hydra, but we haven’t got a handle on it yet. I’m here for two reasons. First, because I wanted you to be on guard when you go back on duty. You’ll be working one-on-one with a high-up Hydra operative. I’m giving you this tablet developed by Tony Stark to communicate with us if you get any idea about what he or Hydra might be planning.”

“Who else has one of these?” 

“Phil Coulson. Yeah,” Steve said tiredly, seeing Trip’s mouth open to interrupt. “He’s not dead. Helluva shock for me too. Probably above your clearance level, so maybe keep quiet about it, although I can’t say I really care much. Also Sharon Carter. Peggy’s great-niece.” 

“Shar-Bear is SHIELD? Why didn’t I know that?” 

Steve did a double-take. “Shar-Bear? Nevermind. Probably the same reason she didn’t mention knowing you were SHIELD. She didn’t want to trade on Peggy’s name any more than you wanted to trade on Gabe’s. Anyway, the second reason is that I wanted to tell you about something that won’t be public knowledge immediately. Bucky Barnes is not dead. When they experimented on him at Azzano, they injected him with some form of the serum, and he survived the fall from the train. He was captured and brainwashed by Soviet Hydra scientists. He’s been in and out of a cryo containment unit for decades. They’ve used him to commit dozens – maybe even hundreds – of ops. Assassinations, mostly, I think. We’re going to get him back. Anyway, Bucky and Gabe – all of the Commandos, really – were close. I wanted you to know.” 

“Holy shit. It was crazy enough to hear that you’d come back from the dead, but Bucky Barnes too? Grandpa talked a lot about the two of you. He said Sarge saved his ass in Azzano. He could hold his own, but five on one odds aren’t great. I guess some of the guys weren’t too thrilled sharing the cell with a black man. Speaking of which, how exactly did you manage an integrated unit?”

Steve chuckled. “I was Captain Fucking America. I pretty much did what I wanted, and Gabe was one of the best men I knew. To tell you the truth, I pretty much did what I wanted before I was Captain America, I just got beat up for it a lot more.” 

Trip laughed. “Yeah, I can see that. Look, this is all pretty heavy, but we’ll get through it. I’ll let you know if I get anything on Garrett. And let me know what I can do.” He raised an eyebrow when Steve’s phone played a snippet of the song _ Iron Man, _and Steve rushed to pull it out of his pocket. “I take it that’s the actual Iron Man?” Steve read the incoming text. _ Come home. We found Rapunzel’s hidden tower. _ Tony. Home. He only realized he’d been staring at his phone, filled with emotion when Trip cleared his throat. “Everything okay, man?”

“Sorry, yeah. Everything’s fine. Tony just finished decrypting some Hydra files. I’ll keep you posted on the plan. Thanks for everything over the last few days. I don’t think I knew how much this would mean to me.” Steve stood and held out his hand for Trip to shake. 

Trip took his hand, eying him a little suspiciously. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but has anyone hugged you this century? Because you look like you could seriously use a hug.”

Steve could feel his throat tighten. “You know, they haven’t. And you’re the first person to ask.” 

Almost before he finished talking, Trip pulled him in. “Thank you. Thank you for my grandfather’s life. Thank you for coming here and for bringing him back to us. Thank you for warning me about Hydra, probably saving my life.” He clapped Steve on the back and pulled away. “Come on in and say goodbye to my mama. I do what I can, but there’s nothing quite like a mom hug to set you right.” 

He was right.

* * *

Steve pulled into the garage at the tower and got off his bike. “Hello, JARVIS.”

“Welcome back, Captain. I’ve alerted the rest of the Avengers to your return, which coincides with that of Thor. They are on the common floor and have asked that I update you on Thor’s story while you make your way there. They believe it will be faster.”

“Of course, JARVIS. Thank you.”

“Dr. Foster was apparently infected by the Aether, which is an infinity stone, like the Tesseract. The Aether is the ultimate weapon of the Dark Elves, who were once at war with Asgard. The leader of the Dark Elves kidnapped Jane and killed Thor’s mother. When word of her murder got out, Loki came to Asgard. Although he hates Odin, he loved Frigga more than anything. He has apparently been using the stolen Tesseract to travel through time and space. The Dark Elves removed the Aether from Dr. Foster, and with Loki’s help, Thor was able to defeat them. However, with his revenge complete, Loki vanished shortly thereafter.” 

“Wow. And I thought I had problems. Is Jane alright?”

“Yes, Captain. She was on the common floor as well, but has returned to her room to rest.”

“Fair enough. Thanks for the update, JARVIS.” Steve stepped off the elevator and everyone stopped talking. 

Tony looked around at everyone; they were all staring at him, except for Rhodey, who was staring at Steve. Tony rolled his eyes. “Oh my god. Stop with the dramatics. We’re fine. It’s fine. The Manchurian Candidate didn’t know what he was doing and Capsicle didn’t do anything wrong. I needed to process. I’ve processed and we’re all good here.”

With his enhanced hearing, Steve heard Clint mutter, “Seriously? He’s calling us dramatic?” 

Steve cleared his throat. “Thank you, Tony. Really.”

“There will be no discussions of emotions, Rogers.” He softened his words with a hand on Steve’s shoulder. “We have a lot of work to do. I know that you want to rescue Rapunzel, but we have to have a coordinated strike.” 

“Stark is right,” Natasha chimed in. 

“Who heard that? Did I black out? Did Romanoff just agree with me?” 

“Ugh, now I wanna take it back. Anyway, if you rescue Barnes, they’ll know you’re not Hydra and the game is up. We have to coordinate his rescue with the elimination of all the Hydra threats. We can pretty easily get the information on a coordinated attack to the main SHIELD locations – HQ, the Triskelion, the Hub, the Academy, the Fridge, the embassy locations we have in all active countries. The problem will be the little teams – ones like Coulson’s – where one or two of their trusted teammates is secretly Hydra.”

“We’ll have to get a list of teams and missions from Fury,” Clint said. “Some of it will depend on who is in charge of the group. If the team leader is loyal to SHIELD, we can have Fury issue encrypted orders for their eyes only. For teams that are led by Hydra, we’ll have to come up with something else.”

“We don’t need anything from Fury,” Tony corrected. “I’ve tapped into all of SHIELD’s records. Figured it would be faster. JARVIS, put together a list of teams that are not currently at a major SHIELD facility and are also led by Hydra.”

There was a short pause and then, “Compiled, Sir.”

“Now we just have to figure out how to get messages to the non-Hydra members of those teams,” Rhodey said. He turned to Natasha and Clint. “Who would you always believe if they sent you a message?”

“No one,” Natasha said.

“My sister Laura,” Clint said at the same time. 

“Could we use their emergency contacts?” Bruce asked. 

“I think this is going to require Captain America,” Natasha said. 

“Okay, how’s this. We bring their emergency contacts to the tower for an all-expense-paid ‘grand prize tour’ with the Avengers. No one would turn that down. Then we – and by we I mean Cap – talk to them. They can record messages of themselves talking with Cap, list the Hydra and non-Hydra members in each group, plus the planned time of attack, and then we have them all send them at once, and boom, we’re ready to go.” Tony threw his arms out in a mimed explosion.

“How will you keep them from sending them immediately?” Clint asked.

“J will put out a dampener that will jam outgoing signals.”

“Oh. Well then. I guess I’m talking to a bunch of family members. That’s a great plan, Tony. I mean that’s basically what I did for Trip, just more… efficient.” Steve sat down heavily on the sofa, a little stunned at how quickly the planning had gone while he had just stood there absorbing the feeling of Tony’s hand on his shoulder. He took a deep breath. “We also have to plan our own attack on the facility where they’re keeping Bucky.” He chanced a glance at Tony, who, surprisingly, didn’t visibly tighten at his words. He looked instead at Rhodey, who was still watching him. Rhodey didn’t smile, but he gave Steve the tiniest of nods.

“I took an initial look at the schematics,” Natasha said, interrupting Steve’s train of thought. “Shouldn’t be a problem.” 

“I hate to complicate things,” said Rhodey, “but do we know if they have any other prisoners?”

Bruce frowned. “They don’t have anyone on record as being a prisoner, but to be honest, I’d be willing to bet at least some of the scientists are there against their will. They might’ve gotten in too deep before knowing what exactly they were getting into.”

“That’s going to have to be something we sort out after everyone is contained. People who surrender will be locked up until things can be sorted. People who fight back are probably in for the long haul. Feel free to kill them,” Natasha said. 

“Agreed,” Steve said. “Natasha and Clint, I’d like you to work with Sharon, Fury, and Hill to do assessments of all the small teams. I don’t want to have situations where the SHIELD agents are overwhelmed by Hydra.”

“On it,” Clint said immediately. 

“J, scan social media for any mentions of big events – weddings, funerals, etc. – that our targeted family members have in the upcoming two weeks. Let’s pick a date that they can all come to. Once you get a hold of everyone, make travel arrangements. Rent out the Plaza for two days. No other guests. Set up drivers to pick everyone up from the airport. You know the drill.”

“Indeed, Sir.” 

They spent the next hour planning both the Hydra takedown and their infiltration of the Hydra base where Bucky was being kept. Eventually, Thor left to check on Jane, Rhodey went to pack, since he was leaving the next day, and Bruce went to check on an experiment he’d left running. 

Clint glanced at Nat. “We’d better get started on team assessments. We’ll keep you posted on any teams where we think that Hydra outguns the SHIELD agents. Good to have you back, Cap.” They melted away. 

“You’d think spies would be more subtle,” Tony commented dryly. 

“They have to account for their audience. They know I’m a little dense,” Steve replied, standing to face Tony. Tony laughed. “Tony, I know you said no emotions, but I really want to thank you for this. I know I’m asking a lot, and you’ve already given me so much. If at any point you need some extra space from me, I hope you’ll tell me. I can go to DC for a few days, hang with Sam while he wraps up his life there.”

The one expression Steve did not expect was confusion. “Okay, we’ll get to the ‘asking a lot’ thing in a second, but what the hell do you mean I’ve given you so much already?”

“You gave me a home in the century, Tony. Not just the tower, although it’s amazing. You let me invade your whole life. You took up the fight for Bucky like it was your own with no questions asked. You spent a whole bunch of time teaching me about modern tech. Hell, you let me sit in your workshop and sketch while you work. I’ve been literally invading your sacred space. I was surviving at SHIELD. Here, I get to actually _ live_.” Steve realized he was gushing and started to blush. “Anyway, I realized that I never really even thanked you for that. I just sort of let you do it.”

Tony blinked at him. “Seriously? I’m sorry, _ seriously_? You’re standing there, after I kicked you out of your home for three days, thanking me for being your friend?” 

Now Steve was really confused. “What?” 

“Look, Steve, air clearing. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was hurt and took it out on you.” 

“You had every right to be hurt. They were your parents. Even if things weren’t always great, you had every right to be mad.”

“It wasn’t that. Or not just that. Look, Barton came and talked to me. Asked me when I wanted him to leave, because clearly I have issues with people who were brainwashed into murder.”

“Well that seems unnecessarily harsh.”

“He’s right. You were right. Barnes – Bucky – didn’t do this. Hydra did this. And I realized that that was only part of it. You said that you thought that future you didn’t tell future me. It just… it felt an awful lot like that other Steve picked Bucky over me, and I took that pretty personally. Which is crazy. The other thing Barton oh-so-helpfully pointed out was that if it was Rhodey, I would probably be pretty… let’s call it intense. Bucky is your best friend, and I should have been more understanding of that. We’re going to get him back, and we’re going to get Hydra out of his brain. I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for. Really, Tony. I, uh, just… I want you to know that I’m not picking Bucky over you. I’m not. And if other me did, he was an idiot.” Steve realized abruptly that he and Tony were standing really close. His whole body felt electrified. He swore he could feel the heat from Tony’s body. He swallowed hard, opening his mouth to continue talking before realizing he couldn’t think of a single thing to say. He closed his mouth, licked his lips, and watched Tony’s eyes track the movement. 

Tony’s eyes shot back up to Steve’s as he took a tiny step closer. “An idiot, huh?” His voice was quieter than before, almost husky. 

He could feel his heart pounding, wondered how Tony couldn’t hear it. Steve nodded. “Yeah. I just can’t imagine keeping anything from you. Can’t imagine a universe where I don’t have you on my side. Where I’m not on yours. Bucky means a lot to me, yeah, but it’s not like…” 

“Like what, Steve?” 

Tony’s voice was breathy now, and Steve hadn’t done this in a long time – since before the serum, really – but he didn’t think he was misreading the signals. He stared at Tony’s mouth for a moment, then reached one hand up to Tony’s face, cupping his cheek gently, ever mindful of his own strength. He heard Tony’s breath catch, decided to take that as a good sign, and leaned in slowly. Finally, his mouth touched Tony’s, softly, not wanting to push too hard. Tony seemed to have other ideas. As soon as their lips met, he pushed up on his toes, leaning more fully into Steve and putting one hand on Steve’s neck and the other on his hip. He tilted his head and let his lips part, inviting Steve in. It wasn’t an invitation Steve could resist. He dove into the kiss and brought his other hand to the small of Tony’s back, pulling him in gently, his heart pounding so loudly in his ears now that he almost couldn’t hear Tony’s soft moan of pleasure. 

They kissed for several more minutes until the door banged open. They sprang apart and looked over to see Rhodey staring at them. “Okay, seriously man? I did not need to see that. I just came back down to make sure you were okay, and this is the thanks I get. Also, I told you so.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Tony said with a smile. “You’re always right. I’ll get you a gold sticker later. Could you go away now please?”

“It would be my pleasure. I would really love to be absolutely anywhere else.”

He left and Tony made a noise that could only be described as a giggle. “Where were we?” 

Steve blushed. “Do you think maybe we should… talk about this?” 

“Oh. Was this… did you not…”

Steve could see Tony starting to panic and withdraw. “No, hey, I didn’t mean it in a bad way. Just, I haven’t done this in more than 70 years. I’m a little rusty.” He smiled and stepped back towards the couch, pulling Tony with him. “I’ve never been able to be with someone and have it not be a secret. I’ve also never been with someone in this body. And I don’t really know how things work now. Is it… was this just kissing for you?” Steve hunched his shoulders, trying to make himself smaller. 

“No!” Tony rushed to respond. “This is definitely not just kissing. I would definitely like more than kissing. That sounded not how I meant it. More than just physical stuff. But also physical stuff. Not gonna lie, really want that too.” 

“That’s good. I want that too. I’ve wanted that for a while, if I’m being honest.” Steve looked at Tony from under his lashes.

“So you really haven’t been with anyone since you got the serum? Any particular reason why?”

Steve managed to overcome his shyness enough to look Tony in the eye. “I think I was waiting for the right partner.”


	12. The Hitman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The team is finally ready to get Bucky back and oust Hydra for good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m so so sorry it’s been so long. Thank you so much to everyone who commented on the last chapter. It’s the only way I could manage to bring myself back. I developed such a weird block after finishing up the last chapter and couldn’t write anything for weeks. Instead, I played a lot of Animal Crossing lol. And then I got laid off, and I spent the next couple of weeks too overwhelmed to do anything constructive that wasn’t absolutely necessary for life. Good news is that I found a new job!! I won’t be starting until the end of July, so hopefully that means plenty of time to write! Anyway, here it FINALLY is :) As you may have guessed from the title, this chapter is largely about Bucky! I hope you enjoy it!! <3 Stay safe and healthy!

Steve woke up the next morning full of giddy energy. Unfortunately, there wasn’t all that much for Steve to do to prepare for the upcoming mission, so he wasn’t sure where to put it. Mostly, it was Tony and JARVIS putting together their gear and organizing the family visits and Clint and Natasha working with Fury to figure out if any of the SHIELD teams would need assistance. He’d already worked with Natasha to finalize their plans for taking down the facility where Bucky was being kept. With nothing else to occupy his brain, he vacillated between worrying about what state Bucky would be in when they got to him and floating on air thinking about Tony. He still couldn’t believe he’d gone from thinking that Tony would never forgive him to kissing him. Deciding he might as well put all this energy to good use, he got up and headed for the kitchen. “JARVIS, is Tony awake?”

“He never went to bed, Captain. He is currently in the workshop.”

“Has he eaten anything?”

“Not since lunch yesterday.”

“Damn. Okay, I’ll take care of it.”

“Thank you, Captain.” Steve smiled, deciding it was nice to imagine him and JARVIS as a team whose goal was taking care of Tony. 

Steve set about making waffles. He hadn’t had them before the ice, but they’d become a favorite of his since waking up – enough that he’d gone to the trouble of learning to make them. He piled waffles, butter, syrup, powdered sugar, whip cream, and coffee onto a tray and took it all down to the workshop. The door whooshed open for him as he approached, but Tony didn’t seem to notice, caught up in whatever he was working on. Steve put the tray on the table by the couch and came up behind Tony, sliding his arms around Tony’s waist. 

Tony startled a little, but sank back into Steve’s chest as soon as he realized who it was. “Well, isn’t this nice? What are you doing down here?” 

“I thought I’d see if I could talk you into breakfast. I made waffles.” 

“You can make waffles? Why didn’t I know that?”

“Because I don’t usually share them. Waffles are my favorite.”

Tony spun on his stool so that Steve was standing between his knees. He reached up and put his arms around Steve’s neck, smirking. “So not only do I get you, but I somehow also get waffles out of the deal? Boy did I do something good in a past life.”

“More importantly, you do good things in this life,” Steve said, giving in to his urge to kiss Tony. Tony hummed into his mouth, pulling Steve in closer. He settled his hands on Tony’s hips, tracing tiny circles over his hip bones, thinking to himself that this was just about perfect. After a too-short moment, he pulled back. Tony groaned, so Steve smiled and kissed him on the nose. “Your waffles are going to get cold. Come eat with me.” 

“Only because you brought whip cream. And you have to promise that we can resume kissing after.”

“Square deal.” 

“I love that you’re already starting to talk like me.”

They spent the next half-hour chatting and eating sweet, syrupy waffles. When Steve finally finished eating, Tony took the plate out of his hand, then slid onto his lap and wound his arms around his neck. “I believe I was promised kissing.” 

“Well it’s very important to keep my promises,” Steve said breathlessly, tugging Tony closer. Tony groaned, pressing himself up against Steve, sweeping his tongue into Steve’s mouth, stealing what little breath he had left. When Tony scraped his teeth over Steve’s bottom lip, he instinctively tightened his grip on Tony’s hips, dragging him even closer and mindlessly grinding up against him. Tony’s responding moan penetrated the haze surrounding him, and he pulled back, releasing Tony immediately. “Oh my gosh, are you alright?” He traced his finger delicately over Tony’s hips. “Did I hurt you? Damn.” 

“Whoa, hey, no. I’m fine. That was a good sound.”

“No, I grabbed too hard, you’re going to bruise. Shit, I’m so sorry.” Steve could feel his breath coming faster and faster, not sure what to do about it. “Please, Tony, I didn’t –” 

Tony put one finger over Steve’s mouth. “I really need you to take a breath. Come on, breathe with me. In-two-three-four and hold-two-three-four and out-two-three-four. Good job, sugarplum. Again now.” Tony continued to breathe slowly in time with Steve until he seemed calmer. “Okay, now, talk to me. You’re upset because you think you hurt me?”

“I did hurt you. You’re going to have bruises in the shape of my hands on both hips.” 

Tony shivered. “That’s not actually the negative you seem to think it is. There is absolutely nothing involved in this encounter that I haven’t loved. It’s all been perfect. I love how responsive you are when I kiss you. I love the way your mouth feels on mine. I love that I can drive you crazy to the point of losing control with one move, without even taking my clothes off. I drove you crazy enough that for one moment, you couldn’t think of anything but me, not even how strong you are. That’s amazing. And sexy. And later, when I’m all alone, I can touch those bruises and think of you.” 

Steve could feel himself blush. Surely Tony didn’t mean… “Really? You’re not upset?” 

“I am the opposite of upset.” Tony slid his arms back around Steve’s shoulders. Instead of kissing him again, he just tucked his face into Steve’s neck and wrapped his arms as tight as he could. 

As Tony hugged him, Steve could feel the tension seep out of him. He took another deep breath, then blew it out. “My mother had bruises sometimes.”

“Oh honey. Those bruises are nothing like these bruises. I promise you.”

“You know, I’ve been in this body for a few years now, so I’ve mostly gotten used to it, but the first few weeks, I was constantly breaking things. I took up more space than before, so I was constantly banging my elbows into things, and the force I used to need to do things like open doors and pull out chairs was much too easy.”

“Not gonna lie, I might’ve broken a door or two the first time I opened them in the suit,” Tony grinned, “But you’re not going to break me.” He guided Steve’s hands back to his hips. “Come on, I want to feel you tomorrow.”

Steve groaned in response and surged back up to kiss Tony. He lost track of everything that wasn’t the feel of Tony – the slide of his mouth, the warmth of his hands, the softness of his skin. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when they were interrupted.

“Wow, that’s new. JARVIS, why did you let me walk into this?” Bruce asked dryly.

“My Apologies, Doctor Banner. You did not ask.” 

“I’m not sure what exactly I did to deserve you conspiring against me, JARVIS. I apologize for whatever it was. In the future, please consider it a standing request. Could you guys stop kissing now?” 

Steve started to pull back, but Tony followed him. “No. Go away.”

“Come on, Tony. We’ve identified a Hydra base with specialized energy fields surrounding parts of the buildings, and I figure those have got to be hiding something we don’t want anyone else getting their hands on. I’d like your help figuring out how to get through the shielding and what’s on the other side. Please?”

Tony groaned, gave Steve one last kiss, and levered himself out of Steve’s lap. “Alright, I suppose if anyone would understand that duty calls, it’s you. Lead on Big Guy.”

With that, Tony and Bruce vanished through the door, leaving Steve behind astonished and fully hard, unsure what to do about either.

* * *

A few days later, Steve was sparring with Natasha, trying to get rid of some of his excess energy, when Tony walked in with Bruce. Steve was immediately distracted, allowing Natasha to get the upper hand and take him to the mat. “Head in the game, Rogers,” she said, kicking him lightly in the shin as she walked over to get her water bottle. “You can’t get distracted by pretty faces in battle. People know I trained you. You’re not allowed to embarrass me.”

Tony, overhearing her lecture, grinned and winked. Steve blushed and looked back at the floor. Clint, who was watching the sparring match from the sidelines with Rhodey and Thor, flicked his eyes back and forth. “Holy shit!” Natasha casually pushed him off the ledge where he was sitting, but he was coordinated enough to turn it into a flip. “You can’t shut me up that easy, Tash. They’re together! Like  _ together- _ together! That totally warrants a holy shit!” He looked around the gym. “Hey, how come no one else is surprised?”

“I already walked in on them making out.” Rhodey replied tonelessly. 

“Yeah, me too,” Bruce chimed in. 

Thor shrugged. “When you’ve lived as long as I, you notice these sorts of things about people.” 

Steve’s eyes flitted around the room. “And everyone is… okay with that?” 

“I mean I don’t really get the romantic appeal of Tony, but whatever floats your boat, man,” Rhodey said with a smile. 

“Ditto,” Bruce agreed.

Natasha just smirked and said, “I told you so.”

“Only if I get details later,” Clint said.

“Actually, I’d like to change my answer to that.” Natasha’s eyes danced with amusement. 

Tony rolled his eyes. “Don’t look at me. You three can paint each other’s toenails and eat ice cream, but leave me out of it. Anyway, now that that’s all settled, maybe you’re all actually curious why we came up here.” 

“Sure, what’s the deal?” asked Clint. 

“We’re good to move on Hydra. JARVIS has worked out all the details with the families, I know the spy twins have finished their assessments of the SHIELD teams, and Bruce and I have figured out how to get past their weird energy fields. Tell Fury that go-day is Saturday.” 

“That’s perfect. Sam’s wrapped things up in DC and will be here tomorrow. We’ll have plenty of time to prepare as a team.”

* * *

Sam’s arrival the next day gave Steve something to focus on. “Welcome to bedlam!” He grinned and hugged Sam when he stepped out of the elevator. 

“I don’t know, it seems pretty normal to me. Aside from the voice in the elevator, anyway.”

“That’s because no one is here right now. Except JARVIS, who is not just in the elevator.” 

“Indeed not, Captain.”

“Okay, noted. So tell me some crazy stuff that’s happened here.”

“Clint challenged Thor to a pie-eating contest. Let’s just say it didn’t end well for Clint, and if Natasha hadn’t saved him, he’d probably have drowned in the blueberry. We keep having to remind Thor that he cannot take off from inside. Do not expect to be able to keep any secrets from Nat. Seriously. I have no idea how, but she knows everything. Bruce does yoga every morning. You will regularly hear loud sounds from the lab because Tony enjoys doing things that occasionally result in explosions. Oh, and after he cooled down about the whole Bucky thing, he and I started dating.” Steve said it all in a rush, sneaking a peek over at Sam.

“Wow, do you know how to bury a lead. You’re dating Tony Stark? That… is not what I pictured for you, but you’re happy?”

“Yeah, really happy. What about you? Ready to make a move on Nat?”

“I feel like it should wait until after the mission. That’s better. We’ll all be more relaxed. That is better, right?”

“How the hell would I know? I’m almost 100 years old and in my first real relationship.”

“Way to be absolutely no help at all.”

“That’s what I’m here for.”

* * *

Friday night, Steve and Tony sat entwined on the couch pretending to watch a movie. “I wish we were going to be in the same place tomorrow,” Steve said with a sigh. “I don’t like not being able to watch your back when Hydra is involved.”

“Me too, but you know it has to be this way. You, Thor, Natasha, and Sam won’t have any trouble getting Bucky out, and Bruce, Clint, and I will be able to deal with the other high-priority base. You need to be there when we find Bucky, and I need to be there to deal with the energy fields. We’ll meet back here tomorrow night. I promise to let you thoroughly inspect my body for damage,” he finished with a leer.

Steve laughed and pulled Tony closer. “Maybe I should do an inspection now for comparison.” 

“That would be the scientific way to do it. They’d make me turn in my PhD if I didn’t encourage appropriate scientific methods.” 

“Can’t have that.”

* * *

Steve paced outside medical, still in his full uniform, waiting for their assessment. Sam, Clint, Thor, and Natasha sat in chairs around him, while Tony leaned against the doorframe. Everyone besides him had changed back into their regular clothes. “Seriously, you’re gonna wear a hole in the floor. I know you’re worried, but Bruce is in there, and we have the best medical staff in the world, and I’ve already got JARVIS working on the data we collected from Hydra. We’ll get him back. Today was a win, Steve. Hydra’s dead. Bucky’s out. Minimal casualties. You’ve got to take a breath. Maybe a shower. Put on some sweatpants. Sleep, even.”

“I have to be here when they wake him up, Tony.”

“I know you do, darling. But he’s going to be in cryo for a while. We have to figure out a way to bring him out of it safely, not to mention how we’re going to get Hydra out of his brain. Everything that needs doing is being done. What you need to do is take care of yourself. Trust me, I get how ironic it is that this is coming from me, but taking care of yourself is important, and of all of us, you got hit the worst in today’s fight.”

“It’ll heal by itself.”

“Do you mean the gunshot wound that is currently bleeding all over my floor or the four broken ribs you think you’re hiding? 

“We can take shifts,” Clint suggested. 

Sensing that Steve was weakening, Sam said, “They’re right. This is a marathon, not a sprint. I’ve seen a lot of recovery. Done some of my own. He isn’t going to be fine overnight. You need to let the rest of us help you.”

Steve sighed and gave in. “Fine. Shower. Breath. Sweatpants.” He turned to Clint. “You’ll stay for now?” 

“And get to guard  _ the _ Bucky Barnes? Count me in. Seriously, Steve, I got this.”

“Okay. Thanks, Clint.” 

* * *

Steve managed to get a couple fitful hours of sleep before he couldn’t keep himself away from medical anymore. When he got there, the doctors had left and Clint had settled himself in the chair next to Bucky’s bed. Clint looked up at him when he entered and smiled. “Hey man. How’re you feeling?”

“Eh, I’m fine. Wound’s closed. Ribs are sore, but not too bad. How are things here?”

“All quiet. They said that physically, he’s in pretty good shape, aside from the arm. Apparently, the way it’s currently attached and wired to his brain, it probably causes him pain pretty much all the time. Seeing as how it’s Hydra, that’s probably on purpose. They’re going to figure out how to rewire it and I’m sure Stark already has blueprints in his brain for a new one.” 

“Thanks, Clint. I appreciate it. Did they say anything about when they can wake him up?” 

“No. I’m guessing they’re going to wait for whatever fancy experts Stark called in to figure that part out. Above my paygrade. But Steve? Speaking as a formerly brainwashed guy, he’s going to need some time. After everything he went through, he may never be the same guy you knew. I’m probably not the same guy I was before, and I actually remember my life before Loki. There’s no guarantee that he will. I just want you to be prepared.” 

Steve sighed. “I don’t know if I can really be prepared for that, but I’ll try. I know it’s a lot to ask, but will you try to… I don’t know, be his friend? If he doesn’t want to deal with me, I mean. That sounds dumb. I just don’t want him to be alone.”

“Hey, neither of you are or will ever be alone again. We’re like glitter. You’ll never be free of us.”

Steve laughed through the lump in his throat. “You know, the idea of that is a little weird for me. I was mostly alone, except for Bucky. I mean sure, I had the commandos, but it was war. It’s safer never to think in absolutes.”

“Yeah, I get that. Not so much the war part, but being mostly alone. My parents were shit. So was my older brother Barney. For a long time, it was just me and my sister Laura. Eventually she managed to be stable enough to fall in love and get married and have a bunch of kids, although he turned out to be kind of a loser who has since peaced the fuck out. Anyway, I was still out here all fucked up. Then I fell into SHIELD and met Coulson. Then Nat. Now this. It’s pretty wild. I mean not wake up 70 years in the future and get beat up by my future self wild, but. You know. Wild for a regular human.”

Steve laughed again. “Yeah, it’s not really a great idea to measure your level of normal against me.”

* * *

A week later, they were ready to wake Bucky up. The best neurologists, psychiatrists, and therapists had weighed in and decided they were as ready as they could be without actually speaking with Bucky to assess his state of mind. Steve was a nervous wreck the whole week. Tony jumped between putting the finishing touches on the new arm he was working on, talking to Bruce and the doctors, and trying to con Steve into sleeping. The former was going significantly better than the latter, despite the combined efforts of the team. They’d set up shifts to keep an eye on Bucky, despite the doctors’ assurance that he would not wake up on his own. Unbeknownst to Steve, they’d also set up shifts to keep an eye on him. He didn’t pick up on this until the fourth time Bruce had coincidentally made an extra cup of tea that happened to be ready right when Steve appeared in the kitchen shortly before the planned wake-up. 

“Tony asked you to watch me, didn’t he?” Steve asked, though the accusation lacked heat.

“Well, technically, Sam set up the rotation schedule, but yeah,” Bruce responded with a wry smile. “We’re just worried about you, Steve.” 

“I know. I appreciate it, really.”

Tony came in then, immediately wrapping an arm around Steve’s waist. “It’s time, Caro. Medical team is ready for us.” He began gently steering Steve toward the elevator. “We’ll all be right there, you know. I figure maybe you want to be in there alone at first, in which case we’ll be waiting in the hall, but if not, I’ll come in with you. Whatever you want. You know. It’s going to be –”

“Tony,” Steve interrupted. “Thank you. I know you’ve been worried about me, but it’s going to be okay. I know he’s not going to be Bucky right now, but the important thing is that he’s safe and he never has to go back to Hydra. We’re going to get him back.  _ I’m _ going to get him back. And it’s all because of you. So thank you.”

Tony actually seemed to be startled speechless, because he didn’t reply as they went to the medical floor. Steve could feel the tension ratcheting tighter as they got closer. He left the others in the hallway, squeezing Tony’s hand before he let go, letting both Clint and Sam clap him on the shoulder. Steve settled himself in the char next to Bucky and nodded at the doctors who were waiting there with him. He knew that despite their concern for him, they were all ready to restrain Bucky if the need arose. For himself, the shield was tucked away in his room. He would see Bucky as Steve, not Captain America. As the doctors woke Bucky up, Steve felt the tension coil in his stomach. Finally, Bucky opened his eyes. 

Steve watched his eyes dart around the obviously unfamiliar space, but he made no other move. At last, his eyes landed on Steve. “Ready to comply. What is the mission?”

Steve’s throat felt like he’d swallowed a gallon of sand. “Bucky?”

This got an actual reaction out of him – he visibly tightened, clenching his fists. “Who the hell is Bucky?”

“Your name is James Buchanan Barnes. I always called you Bucky.”

Bucky seemed confused, but there was still no sign of violence in him. “What is the mission?”

“There is no mission. The people you were with, Hydra, they made you complete missions. They used you. They hurt you, right?” Bucky’s eyes narrowed. “No one here will hurt you. We want to help you.” 

Bucky was silent for a long time. “What is the price?”

Steve spluttered. “What? No, there is no price.”

“There is always a price.”

Steve knew it would be futile to argue about that now. “You may not remember me, but I remember you. You saved my life over and over and over again. It’s about time I could return the favor. I want to help you because you are my best friend, even if you don’t remember it.”

“Payment,” Bucky said flatly. “For something I don’t remember doing.” 

“Look, I know my word doesn’t mean much, but I promise that we’re going to help you and expect nothing in return. I get it. You don’t trust us. That’s okay. We’ll start small. Are you hungry?” This seemed to confuse Bucky even more, but he nodded anyway. “Okay, great! We’ll take care of that.” He stuck his head out into the hall. “Tony, can you get us some pizza? Pepperoni for him, mushrooms, peppers, and onions for me.” He came back in and sat down, noting that Bucky still hadn’t moved, still propped up in the cryo unit they’d brought him in. “Would you like maybe come sit down? You might be more comfortable in a chair.” 

Bucky complied easily, settling into the chair, although Steve noticed that he turned it the slightest bit so that he could see the door. 

They sat quietly for a while, Steve trying so hard not to overwhelm him. Eventually, he couldn’t hold back the question anymore. “Do you hurt anywhere? Have any pain?” When Bucky remained silent and unmoving, he tentatively asked, “Your arm, maybe?”

Bucky looked up at him sharply. “You want my arm?” 

“What? No, no, of course I –”

“What he’s trying to say is that I could get you a new one. A better one. One that doesn’t hurt all the time.” Steve’s head whipped around when Tony entered, but Bucky wasn’t at all surprised by his appearance. “Pizza delivery.” Tony flashed a grin. “I also brought coffee – the good stuff, mind you, so you better appreciate it – and some coke. The drink, not cocaine. I feel like neither of you should do cocaine. Who knows how that would interact with the serum. There’d be a super-soldier-shaped hole in the wall. Yikes.”

Bucky looked utterly bemused. He turned to Steve. “Does he alway talk like that?”

Steve let out a startled laugh. “You know, he really does. Great, huh?” Bucky wrinkled his nose in a face so familiar, Steve felt his stomach clench. “So, food. Here.” He grabbed the pizza boxes from Tony, who gave him a smile and a wink as he left. 

Steve could feel Bucky watching him whenever he did something, copying him a little – putting parmesan on the pizza, picking it up and folding it to eat it, blowing on it to cool it. The pizza was clearly unfamiliar to him, but he let out a tiny pleased sound when he took his first bite. “Good, right?”

Bucky nodded, still watching Steve closely. “Are you getting tired? Do you want to get some sleep?” Buck frowned a little but moved toward the cryo tube. Steve’s heart broke, but he just cleared his throat. “You know, we have a room for you. You don’t have to stay down here. I always hated hospital rooms. Real bed and everything. No cryo, just sleeping.” 

Bucky was clearly still confused, but moved to follow Steve out of the room. “Come on, you can sleep in the second bedroom on my floor. I’ll be close by if you need anything.” 

He got Bucky all settled in his room, heart aching a little at how confused he seemed to be by simple tasks like brushing his teeth. He turned to leave the room, feeling almost like he was tucking in a child, when suddenly Bucky spoke for the first time since they’d left medical. “Your name is Steve.”

He froze. “That’s right. My name is Steve. And I’m with you to the end of the line.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You will notice I just skipped over the fight scenes. This is because I realized I can't write fight scenes. I'm terrible at them. This is largely what drove my initial writer's block for this chapter - I knew there had to be fighting and yet I couldn't write the fighting. Anyway, in future chapters we'll get more info about the specifics of the fight.


End file.
